


resting places

by thefullergirl



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Co-workers, Fake Marriage, Fluff, Kid Fic, M/M, Office, Strangers to Lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:14:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 73,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24307240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thefullergirl/pseuds/thefullergirl
Summary: “Do I want to know what video it’s going to be?”The smile on the producer’s face is already a warning in itself.“You’ve watched the Married For a Week series, yeah?”Where Jaemin and Jeno have to be fake married for a week, living the married life, all with a bundle of joy.
Relationships: Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin
Comments: 207
Kudos: 713





	1. firsts

**Author's Note:**

> my very first nomin! i actually wrote a fic very similar to this for another fandom, and I can't quite get the concept out of my mind, so i'm doing it for nomin too~
> 
> hopefully you enjoy! ♡

**『** **_You were "you"_ ** **_  
_** **_I was "I"_ ** **_  
_** **_We've been living without_ ** **_  
_** **_Knowing each other_ ** **_  
_** **_With a "Hi"_ ** **_  
_** **_Now, it's you and me_ ** **_  
_** **_It's "us" now_ ** **』**

♡

**DAY 0**

Jaemin isn’t sure he wants to look up and meet Renjun’s gaze. “I feel like I should run away before you rope me into some weird video.”

That earns him a slap on the arm from the folder the video producer is holding. “You haven’t even heard what video it is yet.”

Taking a deep breath, Jaemin finishes reading the fifth report of the day. He sticks it in the growing pile before he finally gives Renjun his full attention.

“Do I want to know what video it’s going to be?”

The smile on the producer’s face is already a warning in itself.

“You’ve watched the _Married For a Week series_ , yeah?”

Jaemin’s cup of iced coffee almost crumples in his hand. “No. I am _not_ doing that.”

Renjun curls into himself, pouting. If anyone in his department would see what he’s doing right now, they’ll never let him live it down. “Come on, Jaem,” he whines. “You of all people should know that that series really helped boost our engagement and our subscriber counts.”

“Of course I know it. Doesn’t mean I should suddenly be part of it.”

The series was steadily growing to become a viewer favorite. It had all started when the same people that came up with the _Handcuffing People Together for 24 Hours_ series were brainstorming for something new, but something along those same lines. People liked the idea of starting some sort of relationship or rekindling an old one by living with someone for at least a whole day, spending time with them and learning their habits. 

With the steady stream of comments saying “I ship it” and “they’re so cute”, the producers decided they could take it a bit further. The first pair for the _Married for a Week_ series were understandably awkward, dancing around each other in a tiny apartment, but at the end of it they became rather good friends. Jaemin sees them still sitting together at lunch. They might not have been the type that people would want to root for, but they worked in a way that’s still admirable.

The second pair was what really catapulted the series into becoming one of their most popular on the channel. After reading the reports the morning after the video was posted, Jaemin wasted no time in watching it. Jungwoo and Lucas, a marketing director and a communications coordinator. At first, they didn’t seem to be all that compatible, with them seeming shy around each other and their differences looking very obvious. Jaemin knew Lucas, knew that Jungwoo wasn’t the type that he could easily get along with.

But that week showed a surprising change in the both of them. Halfway through day three and they dared to become bolder, openly flirting to fluster each other. Often, the originally quiet Jungwoo looked pleased as Lucas was caught completely off guard by his attempts. That was the start of something that looked close enough to be a friendship, while continually toeing the line into a territory that made many viewers, including Jaemin, raise their eyebrows.

From then on, viewers had been constantly asking for another installment in the series, hungry for that sort of content. Jaemin saw the appeal of it, but he knew that the pairings mattered more than most anything else. It couldn’t just be luck. They had to pair two people that would give the viewers something to watch. A horribly mismatched pairing will be about 10 times as worse as setting someone up on a blind date.

In a swift motion, the producer perches on Jaemin’s desk, looking straight into Jaemin’s eyes. “It’s not gonna hurt you, you know. It’s just a fun little thing to do.”

Sighing, Jaemin laces his fingers together, placing them on his lap. His eyes dart to a frame on his desk. “Renjun, you know I can’t just do stuff like that.”

Renjun follows his gaze. “I know. But you must also know of what viewers have suddenly been craving.”

Jaemin knew the answer. Of course he did. It was his entire job. “And that is?”

“Family domesticity.” The producer’s smile is too bright, too much of a bad idea.

Rubbing at his temples, Jaemin huffs out a breath. There isn’t really any winning against the producer, not when Jaemin himself has informed him of the trends in the first place.

And of course, Renjun, ever-knowing, knows exactly who to pull for that type of concept. He was good at this, always was. Sometimes, Jaemin thinks, far too good.

“Can I at least meet them first?” Jaemin asks, sipping more of his coffee. He really hasn’t had enough caffeine for this.

Grinning, Renjun jumps off the desk. “Of course! I’ll call you in to a quick meeting later.”

Jaemin only nods, waving Renjun away. He’s gonna need to get a good amount of his work done before that meeting, as he feels like he might not be up to it after.

It’s… not exactly the best idea out there. Not a bad one, really, but not that great either. He sure wasn’t ready for any of it, especially letting an almost-complete stranger into his home and his life. It was all for the cameras and YouTube, yes, but it still was more than Jaemin has allowed in a while.

He drains his coffee cup. No use overthinking it now. One way or another, it was going to happen, and there wasn’t much he could do about it. Once Renjun scouts you for a video that was it.

Jaemin silently wishes that he could just end the day already.

♡

Blinking slowly, Jeno tries to process what he’s just been told. “Can you run that by me again?”

“You’re gonna be married to someone for a week,” Donghyuck says brightly, handing him a printout. “It’s for the YouTube series. You’re just gonna vlog your week with the person you’re ‘married’ to and then we’re gonna make it into a video for our dear viewers.”

Jeno skims over the printout. All he understands are the words _domesticity_ and _family_. “And why me?”

Donghyuck pulls an empty chair to sit down next to him. “Because Jeno, you’re hot and single and you look like you have a mundane enough life for the video to be relatable. Plus, it looks like you’re not ready for marriage at all, so you’re perfect, basically!”

“Uh. Thanks?”

Scooting closer, Donghyuck leans in. “Listen. It’s just a week. You just have to put up with this person for a week and then you don’t have to acknowledge their existence after.”

He’s about to say something when the producer speaks up again. “Or, well, you can do as some of the others have done.” There’s a glint in his eyes that Jeno knows all too well.

“And that is?”

“You can actually start dating them.” Donghyuck looks pleased, his lip curling. A bit like a predator about to latch onto its prey. “Admittedly, that doesn’t _always_ happen, but it can happen with you, who knows? Just think of it as a _really_ long blind date.”

“Hyuck…”

“Okay, I know, you’ve had this thing where you prefer finding a love life outside of your job. I’m not gonna force you to fall in love with him. Maybe you will, maybe you won’t. The point of the video is just to see how well two relative strangers can handle being around each other for a week.”

Jeno resists the urge to rub a hand across his face. “You make it seem like it’s an easy thing to do.”

Donghyuck purses his lips. “We’ve had six pairs so far. It wasn’t a completely life-changing experience by any means for them, but they had fun. The first couple of days might be difficult, what with the adjusting and all, but it’s just a slightly different sleepover honestly. Nothing too complicated, I promise.”

Biting the inside of his cheek, Jeno looks straight at his friend. “And what do I get from it?”

The producer shrugs. “A learning experience? A new friend, certainly. God knows you need that.”

“Again, thanks.”

A pen is pointed at him. “You can meet the guy later. See if you’re comfortable.” Donghyuck stands up from the chair. “I’ll email you the links of the previous videos. Watch them if you can. You’ll see that it’s pretty fun.”

Jeno watches him leave. “I haven’t agreed yet!” he calls out.

Donghyuck doesn’t even turn when he replies “I know.”

Later, at one of the smaller meeting rooms, Jeno finds that he’s the first one there. He checks his email again to make sure he’s in the right room, then finding a seat for himself some distance away from the board. There’s coffee and snacks on one table, and after a moment of consideration, he wheels his chair over to grab a muffin. Belatedly, he realizes he hasn’t eaten lunch.

The door opens, and in comes Renjun, one of the video producers he’s met for some projects before. Renjun smiles at him, taking his place near the board and opening his laptop. They don’t say a word to each other, so Jeno fills the silence with soft tapping against the table.

Donghyuck comes in a few minutes later, with his own laptop in hand and his “this might be whiskey” mug. Trailing behind him is Taeyong, who Jeno knows is most likely directing this whole shoot. They set up, getting ready for the meeting when someone else comes in.

Jeno tries not to raise his eyebrows in surprise at the newcomer. It feels like he’s holding his breath the entire time as the guy takes a seat right across him, scrolling through his phone and sipping at his iced coffee.

For a quick moment, Jeno stares at Donghyuck, trying to get him to look. When the producer does and Jeno widens his eyes, he watches as Donghyuck gives him the slightest of smirks.

Oh, curse Donghyuck for knowing too much.

So that he won’t stare at the man across from him, Jeno busies himself with looking through his emails. Surely there’s going to be a few he hasn’t answered yet, so he might as well get to them as they wait for the meeting to start.

It begins with Renjun saying, “Good afternoon!” in a voice that is more alive than any of them probably feel. “We’ll just run through the general flow of it, and then we’ll leave you to get to know each other.”

Jeno feels his stomach twist a bit at the words. He chances a glance at the man he’s apparently going to be married to for a week, and is met with a dazzling smile.

He’s gonna need to strangle Donghyuck a bit after this.

“As the both of you know, the _Married For a Week_ series is immensely popular.” Donghyuck is looking at the two of them, his hands clasped in front of him. “It makes people excited to see the possible outcome of pairing strangers, especially seemingly incompatible ones, while also giving them a peek into habits and everyday situations that will change ever so slightly with the addition of another person in their life.”

Over his lunch break, Jeno did watch a couple of videos. A good amount of it was obviously fake, or edited in a way to make it look more appealing to the audience. Of course, that’s what the goal was, this idealized compilation of little moments that satisfy a particular fantasy.

None of it was perfect, of course. That was the charm in it. It all seemed absolutely human, with their slightly messy apartments to little pleasures like sharing ice cream. They wanted to replicate the way that relationships were, not exactly too idealistic, but still a tiny bit exaggerated.

Jeno appreciates the work that was put in it to make it look convincing, to make people want to see more. It was fun, yes, but it was primarily made to look romantic, as if the pairs had actual chemistry.

Now, Jeno hasn’t met any of the pairs. He doesn’t know if they were pretending the whole time or not. But he knows that with the cameras, not everything was as genuine as it could be. That’s just how it was.

The subtlest of acting to make it look real enough, but not too real. Jeno knew it well.

“Recently, the response has been better if the pair seems to be opposites of each other, yet they slowly learn that they have more in common than originally thought. Works best that way.” Renjun’s smile feels the same way that Donghyuck’s does. Kind, of course, but also scarily smart. “It’s the buildup that counts. It’s them getting to know each other.”

Another glance right in front of him and Jeno can see him tilt his head, as if mulling the words over. He wonders how he was told about the whole thing, how he could have reacted, what his thoughts are now. Is he really okay with this? 

“Following the releases of our previous Mother’s Day and Father’s Day videos, we’ve noticed that our viewers also eat up the whole idea of taking care of kids, be it robot ones or real ones. This time, we’ve thought of incorporating that concept with an already successful series.”

At this, Jeno furrows his brows. They’re going to take care of a kid too? It’s not just this whole marriage thing, they’re going to be married with a kid?

He looks at the man across from him now, fully, trying to see his reaction. He seems unfazed, like he already knows this, or expected it.

Jaemin. Jeno knows the name well. Jaemin has always been cool and collected, like there was nothing in the world that bothered him, at least in the times that Jeno has seen him. Jeno hasn’t had much of an opportunity to really interact with him. 

“This video will be released as part of our Father’s Day celebration on the channel. We wanted to show different aspects of fatherhood from different individuals that are either not actual dads or are new ones. It’s a way to explore fatherhood, all of its ups and downs, from all these varying perspectives.”

Jeno raises a hand, and everyone turns to him. “Just wanted to ask.” He draws in a breath. “Are we going to be handling an actual kid? Is that okay for us to do? That’s going to need a lot of prior preparation, since the kid won’t be familiar with us…”

Before either Donghyuck or Renjun can answer, Jaemin pipes up. “It’s okay. It’s my son.” He sips at his coffee, still no discernible reaction on his face. 

When he turns to face Jeno, Jeno holds back his surprise. It’s the first time they’ve directly looked at each other. “We’re going to take care of my son,” Jaemin says, the faintest of smiles on his face.

Oh.

Apparently, Jeno knows next to nothing about Na Jaemin.

♡

Wiping his hands on his apron, Jaemin picks up his phone. He had gotten a text notification some time ago, and is now only answering when his dinner is at a simmer.

 **[SOON-TO-BE HUBBY]** **  
****Are u sure it’s ok?**

Jaemin bites his lip. Momentarily, he looks over the baby currently on the playmat in the living room, knocking two wooden cars together.

 **[COOL DAD]** **  
****Yeah, it’s ok with me** **  
****Jisung’s used to having people over anyways** **  
****Is it ok with u tho?**

He pockets his phone, going to check on his stew. Stirring, he tries to clear his mind. The shoot for the video will start tomorrow, and with that, they’re going to start living together as well. They both technically agreed to the arrangement, but Jaemin knew that they were both hesitant. After all, it was going to be new ground for both of them.

Truthfully, his son was used to _specific_ people, like his brother and brother-in-law, his parents, some friends. Jisung didn’t warm up quickly to people, and would often cry and hide in Jaemin’s shoulder. Having Jeno over would prove to be a challenge.

The whole thing, really. It was discussed that they will be sleeping in the same bed, and basically coexisting as any married couple would. Jaemin thinks of his bed, big enough for himself and the baby with some space to spare. He thinks of how no one else has really been in it for a while now. 

With the weight of the phone in his pocket, he considers telling his brother. After all, Jaehyun always came by during weekends for dinner, bringing his husband and bonding with Jisung until the baby fell asleep. It was tradition now, even bringing their parents if possible. 

Sooner or later, he’s going to have to calmly explain the whole situation, so Jaehyun won’t be taken aback at the presence of a stranger he hadn’t bothered to introduce to them. Jaehyun was always at least made aware that Jaemin had been dating, if the person wasn’t already introduced to him one way or another. It’s how it always has been.

Deeming the stew done, he turns off the stove and goes to check on the rice. Just a few minutes more, he decides when he opens the rice cooker. In the meantime, he gets out two bowls, one smaller with a suction cup base, and sets them down on the countertop. He glances over at Jisung, who is now very engrossed in putting his Mickey Mouse plushie into a tiny chair meant for a different toy.

Things were going to change very soon, even if it’s going to go back to normal after a week. How will Jeno’s presence change the home that was only ever for the two of them? Will it ever truly go back to the way it was after he leaves?

Jaemin goes into the living room, gently telling his son that it’s time for dinner. Jisung readily drops his toys, all except for the little plastic pony he always brings to dinner. Hoisting him up into his arms, Jaemin carries him over to peer at the stew first, making sounds that Jisung repeats.

“Is that yum yum, Jisung?” he asks, letting his son inhale the steam from the stew.

“Yum yum,” Jisung repeats, shaking his fist excitedly. Jaemin takes that fist and presses it to his mouth, smooching the tiny fingers.

He sets his baby down into his high chair, fastening his belt securely and handing him his sippy cup of water. Jisung throws his head back as he drinks, the pony in his hand held high so he can look at it. 

Two bowls of rice are scooped out soon after. Jaemin takes out a few pieces of mushroom and zucchini, cutting them into small pieces to put on Jisung’s bowl of rice. He does the same with the pork, talking to his son to keep him occupied while he slices. Ladling the _doenjang jjigae_ over the rice, he mixes it all together before pressing the bowl down onto Jisung’s high chair table and handing him his spoon.

Once he’s gotten a serving for himself, Jaemin sits at the kitchen countertop. He watches as Jisung spoons the food into his mouth, sometimes missing by a bit. The rice grains are all over his mouth and cheeks, but of course, Jisung doesn’t care one bit. 

“Jisung,” he coos, reaching out to touch his baby’s head. “We’re going to have a visitor starting tomorrow.”

His son only looks up at him, tilting his head to the side. He’s pouting, something he might have gotten from Jaemin. “Uncle Jae?”

Jaemin shakes his head. Jisung tries again. “Uncle Junie?”

“No, Jisung,” Jaemin says, smiling. “You haven’t met him before.”

Jisung pouts again, looking down at his bowl. It seems like he’s trying to either find the answer in his bowl of rice or he’s trying to think of who else it could possibly be. “Appa.”

“Hmm?” Jaemin hums, tilting his head to see his son’s expression.

Looking up at him with wide eyes, Jisung asks, “Stay here?”

Jaemin takes a drink from his cup of water. “Yes, he’ll stay here.”

The baby seems pleased at this, scooping up more rice into his mouth. “New friend?” He says it with so much hope that Jaemin feels his chest constrict a bit.

“New friend, yeah.” He strokes the little head of hair again. “Hopefully you’ll like him.”

Jisung doesn’t answer this time, just keeps eating, and Jaemin doesn’t bring it up anymore.

When he’s finished with his bowl and about to get another serving, he feels his phone vibrate in his pocket.

 **[SOON-TO-BE HUBBY]** **  
****Yes** **  
****It won’t be too bad, right?** **  
****It’s just a week**

 **[COOL DAD]** ****  
**Yeah, just a week** **  
****We can do this!**

Jaemin thought, for a lot of different reasons, that they’d have a hard time doing this. Of course, they were going to try, because they didn’t really have a choice now. They had to try. But it wasn’t going to be easy.

Jeno had been quiet for most of the meeting. Jaemin felt like it was just how the guy was, the initial awkwardness aside. That was fine. Lord knows Jaemin needs some quiet in his life.

There was a lot to learn, that’s for sure. He never quite thought he’d be learning all about a person and his habits and how he lived and how to get along with him for a video, but well. It was about to be his life.

Doing all of this also meant he’d let someone learn about him too. Jaemin doesn’t quite remember the last time that’s happened. There isn’t much to learn, he thinks, as he has probably the most normal life outside of his job.

That was supposedly one of the points of the video. Just normal, everyday life, just with someone else in it. He’s already thinking about how much of his normal life he should really film without boring the viewers.

Later, when he and Jisung are both washed up and in their pajamas, he cradles the baby to him as he reads one of his favorite storybooks. It was always like this, their quiet winding down after about an hour of playtime after dinner. Things have always just been the two of them. 

He savors it for one more night.

♡

**DAY 1**

“If only I were allowed to strangle you.”

Donghyuck laughs at him, not even looking up from his iPad. “I’m brilliant, aren’t I? Going to get you married to the guy you’ve been crushing on for years. I’m so great, honestly.”

“Fake married.”

“Whatever.”

Jeno frowns at his reflection in the mirror. The stylist had put some makeup on him so he wouldn’t look so much like death for the cameras, and he’s not quite used to the feeling of it on his skin. “This scheme of yours is not going to work out the way you want it to.”

The producer looks up at him then, pursing his lips. “You don’t know that yet. Have faith, Jen.”

Sighing, Jeno toys with the cuffs of his denim jacket. In a few minutes, he’ll be asked to come onto the set, and he’d have to talk about his initial thoughts of the whole thing before they formally started. Within a half hour or so, he’ll be married.

It’s all so weird, really. Donghyuck had given him another printout, with an outline of what he was supposed to talk about in his individual shoot. Even with it though, Jeno isn’t quite sure he’s confident in what he’s about to say.

Everyone was saying that it’s just going to be a relaxed first segment. Not a lot to say, and he’d be prompted anyways. It’s all just for intro purposes. 

Jeno really isn’t sure what he’s supposed to feel. That morning, he’d already packed enough for the week, the duffel bag in his trunk feeling a little heavy as he went to work. The whole thing wasn’t something he knew how to prepare for. He only took his valuables and an extra pillow and locked his apartment behind him.

He hasn’t even seen Jaemin today yet. Not that it’s going to stop the steady twisting of his guts, but he at least wanted to joke around a little about their situation before it really, truly started. Maybe it could help. Maybe.

Soon enough, he’s called to the studio. Donghyuck gives him an encouraging pat on the back, that hand staying as a way to push him into the room. The producer goes to Johnny’s side, discussing something as Jeno is guided to the middle of the set, in front of an orange background.

He settles in, taking some breaths to calm himself. Renjun is right beside the camera, ready to prompt him for what he has to say. His smile is reassuring today, soft, even as he gulps down whatever’s in his tumbler. 

“Ready when you are,” Renjun tells him. Jeno watches as everyone goes to their places, careful not to stare at him or make him feel pressured. _That’s nice_ , he thinks. He can do this.

Giving a nod, Jeno licks his lips and prepares to begin.

The first thing they have him do is a very enthusiastic “We’re getting married!” which, embarrassingly, takes Jeno about 5 takes. It sounds so weird to say it, and with such a bright tone that suggests he’s actually excited about it? Just no.

Oh, he definitely caught Donghyuck losing it at every attempt. This is most definitely going to be blackmail material for the next few months or so. He’s going to have to try and nab Donghyuck’s phone to erase the clips of his voice breaking as he tries to say the words.

They’re assuring him that everybody is going to do that part, so he shouldn't be worried. He still is. 

The next part is his initial thoughts, which he knows is at least going to be less embarrassing, so he quietly lets out a relieved sigh.

**_How do you know Jaemin?_ **

He’s run this question through his mind a couple times now. Jeno knew that he needed to have a nonchalant answer, even if he also knew that Donghyuck was well aware of the real answer and is most likely to laugh at him again.

Jeno schools his face into a calm expression. “I see him around work. We don’t really talk or anything.”

Renjun makes a gesture with his hands to tell him to continue.

“Don’t get me wrong, I feel like he’d be a great person to be friends with. It’s just that I haven’t gotten the chance to really get to know him, y’know?”

He allows himself a little chuckle. “I guess with this week, I’ll finally get that chance to talk to him more, learn about who he is. Honestly? I don’t know what to feel about it, but we’ll just have to see.”

Giving the camera a shrug, Jeno waits for the next prompt.

**_Do you think you’ll fall in love after this week?_ **

Jeno avoids Donghyuck’s gaze. He laughs, clasping his hands in front of himself.

“I don’t think so,” he says, and is relieved that his voice doesn’t waver in the slightest. “A week?” He shakes his head, as if in disbelief. “I don’t think I’ll fall in love after a week.”

He can’t, however, avoid Renjun’s raised eyebrows. Jeno bites the inside of his cheek.

“I know people want to see it happen,” he says straight to the camera. “I’m just here to prepare you for disappointment.”

Truthfully, though, he wasn’t sure. He was already treading dangerous waters with being fake married to someone he has a stupid crush on, and he doesn’t think being in the same quarters as he is will help in any way. It almost made him scared, but he pushes the feeling down.

Maybe, after this week, they’ll replay that clip of him saying that he doesn’t think he’ll be falling in love to mock him. Maybe.

Done for his individual shoot, he’s ushered back into the dressing room. Jaemin is there already, smiling at him brilliantly through the mirror. Jeno returns the smile, settling into the sofa in the room.

He knows he’s going to be in trouble soon.

♡

“You ready?” Jeno asks.

Jaemin takes a deep breath, pushing the sleeves of his oversized sweater over his hands. “As ready as I’ll ever be.”

They’re sitting on stools at the side as the staff prepared for the next segment. A different backdrop is put into place, pale pink and pretty. A stylist is beside them, with flower crowns and the rings they’re supposed to put on each other. Jaemin is relieved that they didn’t pull out the fake flower archway that they had for one of the other videos, and that they aren’t going to have a whole entourage either.

His individual shoot went pretty well. He’d answered the questions best as he could, and he played along with the quotes they had him say for the intro. Renjun was pleased at the outcome, and expressed his excitement about the upcoming segment.

It was going to be kind of a wedding ceremony, in the simplest way possible. Admittedly, the idea was pretty cute. Just them together in the middle, saying quick vows and slipping the ring on. There were some flower petals that were going to be thrown onto them for that perfect shot. Jeno seemed to be more relaxed now too, compared to the meeting the day before, and Jaemin is glad.

They’re called to go to the middle of the set, made to face each other. Jaemin can’t help but giggle a little at the situation, and it makes Jeno smile too. He decides that he likes Jeno’s smile.

Together, they bow their heads to have the flower crowns placed on top. The crowns are a bit snug, and the ribbon attached to them are being blown about by the fan that’s facing them. Neither of them know whether or not the cameras are filming already, but Jaemin doesn’t quite care.

Renjun has them hold hands, and that makes Jeno giggle. Jaemin decides he likes that too.

Somebody stands to their side, holding the rings on a tiny pillow. Jaemin feels like if he keeps staring at Jeno he’s going to start laughing and ruin the whole thing. He swallows it down, willing a calm expression to stay on his face.

After a while of just looking at each other, they turn to the crew, already unable to stifle their laughter. “Wait, where we supposed to say the vows already?”

Everyone erupts into laughter, Jeno included. It makes Jaemin squeeze his hands unconsciously.

Once everyone has mostly settled down, they face each other again, smiles wide and traces of their laugh still there. Jaemin takes a breath to calm himself, pushing away the feeling of cameras on them.

“Today, I give myself to you in marriage,” he begins, trying to be unfazed by Jeno having to stifle his giggling. “You have me from this day until Monday next week.”

Jeno is starting to go red from holding it in, but Jaemin continues. He vaguely thinks of how his words aren’t exactly to the script, but he doesn’t care. “I promise to encourage you in your work, to drive you everyday, to make your coffee the way you like it. I promise you access to all the herbal stuff Renjun has been giving me, for sickness and for health.”

There’s a laugh bubbling in Jaemin’s chest again, and he lets it out. “I promise to cherish you, and let you win against me in games.”

“Oh, I will.”

Jaemin pretends to roll his eyes. “These things I give you today, and all days of this coming week.”

He slides the ring onto Jeno’s finger, choking back a giggle when it barely goes past the second joint. Jeno can’t hold back anymore, laughing openly at the sight. “God, how am I supposed to go up against his vows?” Jeno asks the crew.

Facing him, Jeno takes a deep breath. He’s slightly squirming under Jaemin’s gaze, which is cute.

“Today, I give myself to you in marriage, from now until Monday,” he begins, and his thumbs are subconsciously running over the backs of Jaemin’s hands. “I promise to wake you up in the mornings, to shove money for gas into your hands even if you refuse, to try to cook something edible for the both of us.”

“Don’t worry, I can cook.” Jaemin grins at him, watches as he tries not to react to it.

“Oh, that’s great!” He slumps a little, as if relieved. Jeno looks into his eyes, the smile still there. “I promise to lend you all my jackets and let you hog the covers, in sickness and in health.”

Something about this whole thing makes Jaemin want to laugh until his sides hurt. It’s too much.

“I promise to hold you in the highest regard, and let you use my Netflix and Spotify Premium.”

Jaemin finds himself grinning again, wider than before.

“These things I give you today, and all days of this coming week.”

The ring for him fits, just so, and it’s cold against his skin. For a moment, Jaemin watches as it catches light.

Renjun waits a beat before shouting, “I declare you man and husband! You can hug or whatever.”

Jaemin notes the slightest pink dusting Jeno’s cheeks and ears as he goes in for a hug. They break away a few moments later, just in time for the petals to be showered over them. Some confetti canons go off as well and Jaemin watches as pieces of confetti catch in Jeno’s platinum hair. Donghyuck has them press closer together for the commemorative photo, and Jaemin easily slings his arm over Jeno’s shoulders. 

It’s weird, all of it, but Jaemin thinks it might not be that bad. 

♡

“Hey, I just need to drop by the daycare center real quick.”

Jeno immediately nods, folding his hands in his lap. “Of course.” He pauses. “I’ll meet him, then?”

The smile on Jaemin’s face is still bright as ever even in the darkening car. “Yes, you’ll meet him in like, 15 minutes.”

Settling into the passenger seat, Jeno looks straight ahead. “Do you think he’ll like me?”

Even without looking, he can hear Jaemin huff out a laugh. “Are you nervous?”

“A bit.”

The song playing on the radio fills in the momentary silence. There is a light rain now, making Jaemin’s windshield look like it has thousands of stars.

“He’s not always okay with strangers,” Jaemin admits, and Jeno feels his stomach drop. “But, for the record, I think you’ll be okay. Just give him some time.”

Jeno nods, looking out the window. He hasn’t really been around babies too much, other than babysitting his sister’s toddler every now and then. It was unfamiliar territory, but then again, all of this was.

The rest of the car ride to the daycare is silent, the only sounds being the rain lazily hitting the windows and the soft song playing. Jeno almost falls asleep, the motion of the car and the scent of rain lulling him. It had been quite the day.

When the car comes to a gentle stop, Jeno looks around, slightly disoriented. Maybe he _did_ fall asleep. Jaemin is already moving to unbuckle his seatbelt, and Jeno somehow finds words.

“I’ll come with you.”

Jaemin looks up at him then, hesitating. Then, he nods, unbuckling his seatbelt and reaching into the backseat for an umbrella. Jeno retrieves his own from his bag, stepping out of the car at the same time Jaemin does.

The soft _pitter-patter_ of the raindrops on his umbrella is calming, and he’s grateful for how the night is cooler than the morning had been. Together, they walk towards the daycare center, all brightly lit with colorful murals on the walls.

Pushing the door open, they’re greeted by a soft, tinkling bell. Jeno inhales the scent of lavender, silently noting that there were very few kids on the playmats playing. Jaemin doesn’t need to go to the counter to inquire, as a woman with the nametag saying “Joy” approaches him, already smiling.

He’s lead to a room, while Jeno is asked to wait. Jeno takes a seat on one of the red plastic chairs lined up against a wall, biting his lip and fiddling his thumbs. Nursery rhymes are being played over the speakers, and one of the screens playing a kid’s show has some of the kids watching intently. There are two dozen drawings of various animals posted onto the walls, as well as little laminated names under them. One of the daycare nurses offers him water and cookies, but he politely declines.

A few minutes later, Jaemin emerges from the room, a two-year-old dressed in a bear hoodie on his hip. He seems to have an animated conversation with his son as he follows Nurse Joy to the counter to sign the logbook. The kid hasn’t seemed to notice Jeno yet.

The conversation continues even as the pair approach Jeno, who is already standing up from his seat.

“Big sun." 

"Oh, you saw a big sun?" Jaemin's voice is different as he talks to his son, even brighter than usual, a pleasing lilt to it. "How big was it?" 

The boy stretches out his arms as far as they can go, pride on his face. "This big, appa!" 

And there, when he smiles at his son, Jaemin looks like he glows with the force of a thousand suns. Jeno feels like that alone can power the world for centuries to come. 

It's a little unfair, especially when his son shares the same smile. 

Finally, they come up to where Jeno's waiting, Jaemin switching his son to his other side. Jeno approaches them cautiously, not wanting to scare the baby. He lowers the camera he had been using to film a few clips of them.

He sees Jisung register his presence, promptly hiding his face into Jaemin's neck. The smile on his father's face softens, a hand placed on his back. 

“It’s alright, Jisung,” he coos, rubbing soothing circles with his hand. “This is the visitor we’ll be having.”

Jeno stays put, unmoving until Jaemin gestures with a slight tilt of his head. Coming forward carefully, Jeno tries to peek at the boy’s face.

“Hi,” he gets out, softer than he originally intended. “Hi. I’m Jeno.”

Jisung peeks out one eye, looking at him like he’s trying to decide whether to trust him or not. Jeno lets an easy smile spread across his face.

“I’ll be staying over, if that’s okay with you?” he says, drawing closer. He sees the baby’s spine tense just a bit, but Jisung doesn’t make a move to hide his whole face again.

“Jisung-ah.” Jaemin’s voice is like smooth honey. “You’ll be okay with that, right, honey?”

There’s the slightest of nods, and Jeno breathes a sigh of relief. Stretching out one of his hands, he lets Jisung hold onto two of his fingers. He wriggles them in greeting.

“Hello, Jisung,” he says, as gentle as possible. “How old are you?”

Letting go of his fingers, Jisung holds up two of his own. 

“Two? That’s great!” Jeno has no idea if what he’s saying is what he should say, but Jaemin nods at least.

“Do you want to have Uncle Jeno carry you?” Jaemin asks, starting to shift the baby’s weight. Jisung responds by shaking his head, wrapping both arms tightly over his dad’s neck.

“Okay, okay,” Jaemin says, rubbing his back again. “Too much for today. We’ll try again tomorrow.”

It has at least stopped raining for the meantime, and both of them carefully walk to the car. Jaemin puts Jisung into the baby seat after a bit of a struggle, since the baby doesn’t want to let go of Jaemin yet. He’s soothed with words, Jaemin pressing little kisses on his hands as he promises that they’ll be home soon.

Jeno doesn’t mind it when Jaemin starts playing nursery rhymes for Jisung, happy that the baby seems to be distracted by them. At a stoplight, Jaemin has Jeno reaching over to the back to hand Jisung a little plush toy that squeaks, and the baby seems enamored with it for the rest of the ride home.

The Na residence is a cozy one-storey home tucked in a relatively quiet part of town. There’s the beginnings of a garden, mismatched pots with plants of different heights. The steel gate closes behind them a little loudly, jolting a drowsy Jisung from his father’s shoulder. Jeno opens the front door for them, letting them enter before him and his duffel bag.

For someone who’s living with a two-year-old, the space is relatively clean. There’s a playmat and some toys in the living room in lieu of an actual coffee table, and a laundry basket full of plushies and colorful onesies in one corner, but other than that, it wasn’t what he expected it would be. Jaemin gives him a little tour first, showing him the bedroom, the bathroom, a laundry area, and a home-office-slash-guest-bedroom. It’s all quaint, but neat and homey. He films everything, but mostly Jaemin’s form as he goes from room to room.

After the tour, Jaemin sets Jisung down on the playmat, handing him some of his toys. “Would you mind watching over him for a bit? I’ll just cook a quick dinner.”

Jeno nods, settling into an armchair near the playmat. He decides to put away the camera for a bit, not wanting to invade Jisung’s space too much on the first day. Jisung has his own world, not even minding him as he tinkers with his wooden food set. There’s a little knife as well, and he cuts through the velcro holding the pieces together.

To Jeno’s surprise, Jisung puts some random slices of the wooden vegetables into a tiny plate and stands up to give it to him, expression shy.

“Is this for me?” Jeno tries to replicate the way that Jaemin talks to him, but ultimately fails. Jisung only nods, going back to sitting on his mat and putting together another plate of toy food.

“You have to pretend to eat it,” Jaemin calls out from the kitchen, and Jeno hears him open and close the fridge.

When Jisung returns with another plate, still shy, Jeno makes eating sounds, holding up the pieces to his mouth. The baby seems to be pleased, holding out half a wooden carrot to him. Jeno takes it, saying a small thank you as he pretends to eat it. It makes Jisung smile, just the slightest bit.

“He likes you,” Jaemin says, looking up from where he’s chopping something rather quickly. “He even fed you.”

Jeno laughs, training his eyes back on the little bear engrossed in another one of his toys. This time, it’s a set of big building blocks, brightly colored and standing in a tall tower.

“It’s an honor to be liked by a baby,” Jeno replies. Jisung returns to him, taking the plates. Jeno makes a gesture to show that he’s full. “They’re always the biggest critics.”

Even from where he’s seated, Jeno can hear Jaemin’s chuckle. “You’re right about that.”

Not long after, Jaemin calls over his son to the kitchen. Jisung looks up after a bit, standing on his little legs and walking over to his dad. Jaemin picks him up easily, showing him the food. The smile on his face is toothy, puffing his cheeks out. Momentarily, Jeno thinks about how this must be their everyday, and how he feels a bit like an intruder.

Okay, a lot like an intruder.

Jaemin calls him over after a minute, putting a bowl of kimchi fried rice in front of him before securing Jisung in his high chair. The baby makes grabby hands at the food, and Jaemin gently reminds him that it’s still hot and to be careful. Jisung blows excitedly on his little spoonful of rice, and Jeno suppresses the urge to reach over and squish his cheeks.

Well, Jaemin sure wasn’t lying when he said he could cook. It wasn’t just decent, the bowl of rice felt like coming home after a long day. Jaemin is quietly pleased at his grunts of approval, hiding his smile as he helps Jisung clean off his sticky fingers.

“So, everyone,” Jeno says into the camera, panning it down to his empty bowl. “A testament to how good of a cook my hubby is.”

That earns him a light slap on the arm, but Jaemin is laughing anyways.

Jeno offers to wash the dishes so Jaemin can give the baby a bath. He seemed grateful at that, whisking Jisung off into the bathroom to get him clean.

Once done with the dishes, Jeno wanders into the bedroom, taking out his pajamas and his own soap and toothbrush. He waits patiently for the two to emerge from the bathroom, perched on the bed. In that time, he uses the chance to look around the room.

Jisung’s cot is beside the bed, his blanket a light green with sheeps on it. There’s some toys in the room as well, just spilling out of one drawer. A few framed pieces of art are on the wall, as well as Jisung’s drawings pinned to a board on the dresser. Not much decoration, as Jisung could easily reach a lot at this age, but the room didn’t feel bare.

“Okay, first night here.” He turns the camera around to film some of the bedroom. “It’s all real now, I guess."

They come soon after, Jisung giggling in his towel-wrapped state. Jaemin seems to have taken a bath as well, his hair damp and his bathrobe on. “Incoming baby!” he warns, and Jeno stands up immediately. Jisung is placed in the middle of the bed, Jaemin making sounds as he dries his hair. Jeno mumbles that he’s going to use the bathroom, and Jaemin grants him a nod before turning back to his son.

There’s a space on the shelf inside the shower for Jeno’s soap and shampoo, and it makes him smile.

Jeno thinks that it’s like home already.

♡

“And with that, the little kitty is back in his little crib, safe and sound.”

Jisung’s bottle of milk has already dropped to his lap, and Jisung’s head is soon to follow. Carefully, Jaemin maneuvers him so that he’s cradled into his arms. He makes his way to the crib beside the bed, gently setting his son down. Jaemin smooths his hair back, putting his favorite Mickey Mouse plushie beside him before pulling up the blanket.

“Goodnight, Jisung,” he whispers, leaning down to press a barely-there kiss on the small forehead.

Jeno practically tiptoes into the bedroom, careful not to rouse the baby. It makes Jaemin laugh.

“It’s okay. He doesn’t wake that easily, don’t worry.” He pats the space beside him, and Jeno still crosses the room with caution.

He seems to be holding his breath. Jaemin shakes his head, giggling. “You really don’t have to be _that_ careful, you know?”

“Just wanted to be sure.” Jeno’s eyes dart to the crib, at Jisung’s sleeping form. “Is it always that easy to make him fall asleep?”

Jaemin shakes his head. “Usually there would be another hour of playtime after dinner, but he must be exhausted from today.”

Jeno nods, still looking at the crib. “He’s such a sweet baby.”

That makes Jaemin smile. “Yeah, he is.”

For the first time since Jeno came in the room, Jaemin takes a look at him. His hair is damp, spiking out in odd places. He’s dabbing his towel to his ears and neck, catching stray droplets. On his frame is a tank top and loose-fitting pajama bottoms, and he sits cross legged on the bed now. Jaemin’s gaze catches on the dark ink on his skin, patterns snaking their way down his shoulders and upper arms, disappearing under his shirt.

“You have tattoos,” he states, still looking at them. Jeno’s head tilts up to meet his gaze, and he seems almost sheepish.

“Yeah. I have a lot,” he chuckles, rubbing at his neck. Jaemin can’t quite make out all the patterns yet, but he’s fascinated at how they move when Jeno moves his arm.

Jaemin stops himself from reaching out and tracing the paths of dark ink. “I like them.”

Jeno’s eyes seem to light up at that. “Really?” He sounds so sincere, so hopeful about it, and Jaemin almost melts.

“Really.” He smiles at him. “Can you show them to Jisung in the morning? He’ll love them too.”

The smile on Jeno’s face is so wide it might just split his face. “Of course! I’d love to show them.”

When he’s like that, all excited and smiling, Jaemin can’t help but be reminded of a puppy. Jeno has the face and demeanor of an excited pup, with a body that will most likely send his brother into a conniption.

Speaking of.

“By the way,” he begins, and Jeno is instantly alert. “My brother likes to have dinner here during the weekends, so I just wanted to ask if that’s alright with you? We can skip this weekend if you’re not comfortable with that.”

Jeno’s eyes widen. “Oh, uh, of course that’s fine! If you’re okay with me meeting him, I’d love to!”

Jaemin smiles again. He doesn’t think there’s anyone more sincere than him.

Wordlessly, Jaemin reaches for his bedside table, retrieving the camera. He asks a question with his eyes, and Jeno nods.

Slowly, Jaemin films the tattoos, or at least what he can see. “Wow,” he breathes out. “Didn’t know I married a bad boy.”

Jeno almost shoves the camera right out of his hands.

Jaemin turns the camera to face them, and they lean against his headboard. “Okay everyone,” he says, tilting his head towards Jeno’s. “We’re gonna set some ground rules.”

Beside him, Jeno nods, pursing his lips. “Okay, what’s the rules?”

“First one: No falling in love.”

This makes Jeno cough, crumpling into himself from laughter. “Hey that’s a legitimate rule!” Jaemin all but whines, slapping Jeno on the back as quietly as he can.

“Okay, fine. I never intended on doing that anyways.”

Jaemin stares at him for a second before looking away.

“Second one: Everything in this house is yours to use, but with care, please.”

Jeno hums, giving a little smile to the camera. “Noted.”

“Next one: We’ll stick to the chores schedule as best as we can.”

At this, Jeno turns to look at him. “We don’t have a chores schedule yet.”

Jaemin waves with his hand. “I’ll make one in the morning.” Jeno nods at this.

“Next: We should talk about any problems.”

This earns him a raised eyebrow. “Oh, we’re really in this marriage thing, huh? Okay.” The smile he gives the camera is soft.

“Any problems, okay?” Jaemin turns to face him, pouting slightly. “We need communication for this to work.”

“That makes sense.”

“Fifth: No loud music when Jisung’s asleep.”

“Done.”

“Sixth: I haven’t thought this through. Do you have anything you want to make a rule?”

For a while, Jeno ponders on it, tapping his lip with a finger. 

“Sixth: I wasn’t kidding when I said let me pay for gas.”

Jaemin levels him with a look, but it isn’t like Jeno will give in any time soon. So, he concedes. “Anything else?”

“Mmm. I guess we shouldn’t bring friends over here with no prior warning?”

Oh, that one’s pretty good. How come Jaemin didn’t think of that?

“I like that one. No Donghyuck and Renjun here unless the both of us agree to it.”

Jeno chuckles. “I agree to that. Should we add more?”

Jaemin hums, trying to think. “We need to say if we’re uncomfortable with something.”

Furrowing his brows, Jeno asks, “Isn’t that like, the fourth one?”

“Yeah, I guess.” Jaemin looks down at his lap. “Just wanted to warn you: I’m rather… clingy at times. Just tell me if it bothers you, okay?”

By the look on Jeno’s face, it seems like he didn’t expect that one at all. “Uh, yeah, sure. It’s cool though, I think.”

Jaemin must really be sleepy if he sees Jeno squirm around like he had earlier. “That’s about it, yeah?”

There is an answering nod.

“Okay then. We both gotta go to sleep. See you tomorrow, everyone!” They wave goodbye, and Jaemin turns the camera off, setting it back down on his bedside table.

Jeno slumps beside him, his shoulders dropping. “This whole vlogging thing is so tiring.”

Chuckling, Jaemin replies, “Tell me about it.”

There’s a while of silence, and Jaemin can practically hear Jeno worrying down on his bottom lip. The bed is at least gracefully big enough to fit the both of them without them having to cuddle or anything, and Jaemin feels like Jeno is relieved at the thought.

In the lamplight, their rings reflect the yellowish glow. They look almost gold like this. Jaemin knocks his ring against Jeno’s.

“We’re really doing this.” He breathes, closing his eyes momentarily. “We’re going to be together for a week.”

“It’s weird, isn’t it?” Jeno says, all too quietly.

“Very weird.” Jaemin allows himself a smile, but he knows it looks tired. “But I guess it won’t be terrible.”

Jeno snorts. He’s warm, his body heat radiating and almost kissing Jaemin’s skin. It’s tempting to lean into him. “Let’s try not to be terrible to each other.”

Jaemin shakes his head. “We won’t be.”

They settle into bed not long after, Jeno taking out his own pillow and blanket. Unsurprisingly, they sleep with their backs to each other. Jaemin has no idea if it will change over the days, but he finds himself wishing that it would. Just a bit.

He’s still going to get back at Renjun for even roping him into this, but for now, Jaemin doesn’t mind it as much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> points to you if you know the song at the very beginning ♡ i'd appreciate any feedback on this chapter, as it is my first time writing them!
> 
> [this ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KPCppITII4s&t=812s) might just be the playlist for this whole fic (i sure as hell wrote it while looping that so)  
> talk to me over at [twt](https://twitter.com/evnsangcvlt) or [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/evnsangcvlt)


	2. learning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i got myself into massive nomin feels before writing this so really i've just been emo for a few days askfkdfk  
> also i think i got into a jeno-loving headspace while i was writing this chapter so (i think it's evident)
> 
> hopefully you enjoy this chapter! ♡

**『** **_There's things I wanna say to you_ ** **_  
_ ** **_But I'll just let you live_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Like if you hold me without hurting me_ ** **_  
_ ** **_You'll be the first who ever did_ ** **_  
_ ** **_There's things I wanna talk about_ ** **_  
_ ** **_But better not to keep_ ** **_  
_ ** **_But if you hold me without hurting me_ ** **_  
_ ** **_You'll be the first who ever did_** **』**

♡

**DAY 2**

Jeno wakes up to a baby crying.

His first instinct is to press the pillow over his ears, draw the covers up. Some part of him is vaguely aware that it’s much too early for him to be awake, meaning that it’s much too early for him to deal with that.

But then he feels a body on the bed shift, and he’s then reminded that he’s not at home, not in his own bed. Jeno turns to face the rising body, blinking away the sleep still clouding his vision.

Jaemin gets out of bed all too easily, even though it seems like his eyes are still closed. He goes over to the crib, leaning down to scoop his son into his arms. There’s a soft noise from his throat as he hoists the relatively heavy baby up, cradling him to his chest and starting to rock him.

“Hey,” Jeno hears Jaemin whisper. “It’s okay.”

Moving towards the window, Jaemin keeps swaying softly, a hand on Jisung’s back to pat him gently. Jisung isn’t wailing anymore, but he’s still crying as he burrows his head into the crook of Jaemin’s neck.

“Are you okay?” Jaemin asks. “I’m here. I’m here, Jisung-ah, it’s okay.”

While the baby settles into whimpers, Jeno sits up. He watches as Jaemin moves, his messy hair and drowsy face illuminated by the moonlight shining through the window. There’s exhaustion in his features, and his posture as well, but he doesn’t falter in comforting his son. It takes a minute before Jeno realizes he’s humming, a tune he can’t quite recognize, and he watches as Jisung’s back heaves up and down with his breaths.

When Jaemin turns, he spots Jeno looking at him. Jeno tries to perk up, ask _Do you need help?_ to which Jaemin only shakes his head no, offering a small smile and a _thank you._ He keeps rocking him ever so gently, until Jeno can see the little hand gripping at Jaemin’s shirt go limp.

They stay there for a bit, Jaemin unstopping in his motions even as he’s become aware that his son is asleep. He’s taking deep breaths himself, as if willing the rise and fall of his chest to be comforting to Jisung. Jeno doesn’t say anything, doesn’t even move, as Jaemin makes sure that Jisung is completely asleep.

Carefully, Jaemin lowers the baby into the cot, taking extra care to be slow in his movements. There’s a soft towel nearby, and he uses it to wipe the last of his son’s tears away. He draws the blanket over him once more, a hand coming up to stroke his head softly.

“Jeno,” he whispers, so soft that Jeno almost misses it. “Can you please get the bottle of oil in the drawer on your side?”

Jeno almost scrambles to do it, his limbs tangling in the sheets as he reaches for the drawer. He pulls it open, rifling through as quietly but as quickly as possible for the bottle. Once he retrieves it, he presses it into Jaemin’s waiting hand. 

Mumbling a soft “thank you”, Jaemin opens the bottle, letting drops of oil coat his fingers before setting the bottle down on his bedside table. Those fingers he uses to massage Jisung’s temples and a bit down his chest, and Jeno can only now smell the lavender. Jisung barely reacts to it, his petal-like lips moving slightly as his dad rubs the soothing oil over his skin.

There’s a hushed moment when Jaemin leans down to press his nose against a small forehead, whispering words that Jeno can’t catch. Jaemin moves away after a few moments, giving one last reverent stroke to the baby’s head.

He settles into bed again, pulling the covers up his legs. “Did he wake you? I’m sorry about that.” Jaemin is fiddling with his fingers in his lap, eyes trained on Jeno.

“Yeah, he did. But it’s okay.” He shrugs. “Babies wake up. Babies cry. It’s like that.”

A sigh leaves Jaemin’s lips. “Still. I’m sorry. That doesn’t happen very often anymore, and I don’t know why it happened just now.”

“Is he okay?”

Jaemin bites down on his lip. “Mmm. It’s hard for him to voice out stuff. I don’t always understand, but I always try to comfort him the best way I can.”

Jeno nods. He’s tempted to take Jaemin’s hands in his, squeeze them comfortingly. Jaemin’s doing a great job, Jeno’s sure of it. He may not have seen it all, but he knows.

“You need to let me help,” he says, and something flashes across Jaemin’s expression.

“What?”

“You need to let me help,” he repeats, slightly over a whisper. “With taking care of him. Not just since I’m living in your house and all, but also since I’m your husband now. He’s my responsibility too.”

Those warm brown eyes search him, and Jeno doesn’t know what he’s looking for. Jaemin looks tired like this, without his fashionable clothes and the phone almost glued to his hand and that blinding smile. He looks like someone who has never really gotten a good night’s sleep, who’s had to fuss over a lot of things, and who’s had to not share that burden.

“Are you sure?” he asks, and Jeno thinks that he’s imagined the slight wobble in his voice. “I can handle it just fine.”

Jeno curls his hands into his lap. He can’t quite reach out to touch him, even though he has a feeling it would be okay. Too early, far too early in this to do that.

“I’m sure,” he answers, looking Jaemin in the eyes. “Let me help. I won’t be perfect in it, but I’ll try to do what I can.”

Jaemin’s mouth falls open just a bit, as if he wants to say something. He chooses against it, just nodding his head. 

In the quiet moment that follows, Jeno lets his eyes wander over to the cot where Jisung is still fast asleep. He really has no idea how to take care of someone that young, someone so shy and yet so sincere. Someone so _tiny_. It was never something he’s had to do before, and even his occasional babysitting was never with a baby like Jisung. His niece was loud, excitable, and had already started to learn the joys of “pranking” her parents. Jeno was mostly there for an hour or two, three tops, and he has a feeling that it would be nothing like having to take care of a two-year-old for a whole week.

It was scary, definitely. Truthfully, Jeno hadn’t even really thought of getting kids any time soon. It just wasn’t part of his plan for the next 5, maybe 10-ish years. Jeno liked kids, but he knew he wasn’t ready for one of his own.

Now, here, he has a kid, someone he has already silently sworn to protect. It’s all temporary, yes, but he was willing to do everything he can for this baby.

He didn’t know if he could do it, but he meant it when he said that he’ll try. If he could get the approval of one baby in his life, it might as well be this one. 

When he turns back, he meets Jaemin’s gaze, expression unreadable but undeniably soft. Closing his eyes, Jaemin whispers, “Thank you.”

Jeno offers a smile, even if Jaemin can’t see it.

♡

A gentle hand on his shoulder wakes Jaemin up. He opens his eyes to Jeno looming over him, eyes wide.

“Uh, I didn’t know what time you got up usually, but your alarm has rang twice.” He looks sheepish as he says it, hand rubbing the back of his neck.

Jaemin pulls himself up into a sitting position, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes. “What time is it?” he asks drowsily.

“Just a few minutes past 7.”

Nodding, Jaemin says, “Okay, okay. Just give me a minute.”

Jeno nods, walking out of the room. Jaemin is tempted to steal 15 more minutes of sleep, but he knows that might end in disaster. Instead, he turns to the crib beside the bed, immediately finding it empty.

“Jeno?” he calls out, his voice scratchy. “Jeno? Is Jisung there?”

“Hmm? Oh, yeah! He’s in the living room.” There’s the sound of Jeno rifling through the cupboards, probably looking for something to eat for breakfast.

Jaemin breathes in a sigh of relief. He wonders whether Jisung asked Jeno to carry him out, or if Jisung got up and wandered into the living room himself. Yawning, he stretches his arms above his head, letting them fall onto the covers after.

Beside him, on the other side of the bed, Jeno has already folded his own blanket and smoothed down the covers. He’s left his phone and watch on the table on his side, no trace of anything else there. _Jeno’s nice_ , is all Jaemin’s mind can really say.

After a few more minutes of just sitting in bed, Jaemin wills himself to stand up. It’s another day, and as always, he cannot just sit in bed like that.

Jeno is in the kitchen, mixing something with a whisk. He looks up when Jaemin emerges from the bedroom, flashes him that smile that makes his eyes become moons. 

“Good morning!” he greets brightly, turning his attention back on what he’s mixing. “I’m making waffles, if that’s okay? I promise I won’t burn them.”

Jaemin feels a chuckle rise up in his throat. “Waffles are fine, thank you. Good morning to you too.”

There’s another smile, softer this time, and Jaemin thinks it’s unfair that someone is already cheery this early in the morning.

Padding his way to the living room, he can see that Jisung is already playing with his building blocks. Jaemin sits cross-legged on the carpet next to him, his hand cupping the back of his son’s head.

“Good morning, Jisung,” he greets, and the boy looks up at him. “What are you building over there?”

Jisung hums for a while, looking for the word to say. “House.”

“Oh, you’re building a house? Can I help?” Jaemin’s already starting to reach for the box of blocks.

“Mmhmm,” Jisung says, nodding his head. “Appa help!”

“Yes, appa will help.” Grabbing two handfuls of blocks, he places them down on the carpet and starts working.

His son is more than willing to tell him where to put the blocks, pointing at a wall with gaps or making him do a roof. The box is missing some pieces, Jaemin knows, so he can’t really fill in all the gaps, but it doesn’t seem that Jisung minds.

Booping Jisung’s nose, Jaemin says, “We’re gonna eat waffles today.”

Jisung immediately perks up at that, his whole attention on Jaemin’s face. “Waffle?”

Jaemin nods, smiling. “Yes, waffles. Uncle Jeno over there is cooking them right now!”

A tiny gasp leaves the two-year-old. He’s beating his tiny fists onto his knees, chanting, “Waffle! Waffle! Waffle!”

“Ah, you’re so cute,” Jaemin coos, rubbing his sons’ head. “We’re gonna eat the waffles soon okay? We need to wait. Can you wait, Jisung-ah?”

Jisung nods enthusiastically, his fluff of hair bouncing as he does. “Sungie wait.”

Giving him one last pat on the head, Jaemin gets up to help Jeno in the kitchen. He already has a small pile of waffles on a plate, and he’s ladling more of the batter into the waffle maker.

“Hey,” Jaemin says, sidling up to him. “Need some help?”

Jeno shakes his head. “I got it. I made some of them chewy and some of them a little more crispy, if that’s okay?”

“That’s fine, thank you.” Jaemin feels himself beam at him. “By the way, did he uh, wake you?”

Chuckling, Jeno presses the kitchen timer on the counter. “I was already kinda awake, but then he was walking over to me and grabbing at the blankets.”

“Ah, yeah, he does that. It wasn’t too early, was it?”

“Nope.” Jeno steals a glance at Jisung still playing with his blocks. “I usually get up at that time anyways. I filmed him a bit, him leading me out and then him playing on the mats.” He pauses. “Also talked about a bit of last night. Hope that’s okay.” Jeno winces.

Jaemin allows himself to smile. “It’s alright, I don’t mind. You’re really getting into this vlogging thing,” he remarks.

“Yeah, I like it.” Jeno opens the waffle maker, tests the doneness. “I just think of it as documenting moments I want to remember, so it doesn’t feel like anything pressuring.”

Moments he wants to remember. It was nice to think of it that way, rather than an arrangement. Jaemin decides he’s going to do it like that too. 

Which reminds him.

“Do you mind waiting here a bit? I’ll just get something.”

Jeno nods, waving him off. Jaemin retreats back to the bedroom, opening one of his drawers and retrieving his film camera.

It’s been some time since he’s used it, especially on a subject that was not his son or his family. He wanted to save on film for the meantime and use the camera only for the most special of occasions, but he feels like he should document this Jeno today.

He walks out of the room to see Jeno setting the plates down onto the table, moving towards the fridge to get the syrup. Jaemin waits for him to finish setting it all up before he coos, “Jeno, let me take a photo!”

Jeno practically scrambles to pose, crouching down so his face was between the two plates of waffles stacked high. His smile makes Jaemin smile as well, and he presses the shutter button.

Already, he’s thinking he’s going to have to buy more film for this week.

He calls over Jisung, who responds immediately to the word “Waffles!” and proceeds to walk over to the table. Jaemin lifts him into his seat, gently telling him to be patient as Jeno cuts a waffle into small pieces. Jisung is all grabby hands once the plate is placed in front of him, uncaring for a fork as he takes the syruped waffle bites and puts them into his mouth.

Jaemin is barely done with his own when Jisung asks for more, so Jeno cuts up another one for him. The way he smiles at his son, and the way he tries to soothe him as he finishes slicing and transferring to his plate, it makes something in Jaemin feel warm.

 _He’s my responsibility too._ Jaemin hides his smile behind his cup of coffee.

♡

Donghyuck pokes his cheek. “Wow, already got that married glow, huh?”

Jeno swats his hand away. “‘M working, Hyuck.”

There’s a giggle from his friend, followed by another poke to his cheek. “Maybe you should get married more often.”

Fixing him with a look, Jeno only sighs and goes back to finishing the email he was typing. “Are you here just to tease me?”

“Of course not,” Donghyuck scoffs. “I wanted to check in, you know, since I wanted to be sure it’s all going well.”

Pressing send, Jeno turns to face the producer. “It’s all good. Awkward, but good. Adjusting and stuff, for now, but it’s fine.”

Donghyuck stares at him for a bit, trying to make something out of his expression. “You like the kid?”

At this, Jeno allows himself to grin. “Love him. He’s shy around me still, but I can work on getting close to him.”

“Oh, he’s shy only at the beginning. And then he’ll start babbling on and on and tug you everywhere.” It’s almost comical how Donghyuck’s eyes widen. He’s very fond of the boy, Jeno has noticed.

“Can’t believe you met my son before me.”

With a chuckle, Donghyuck punches him in the arm. “Wow, you’re really getting into character now. I’m a bit surprised.”

At Jeno’s shrug, Donghyuck continues. “Anyways, of course I met him before you. Perks of dating Huang Renjun.”

Jeno resists the urge to roll his eyes. “Please leave the retelling of how you got together for another day. Some of us are single over here.”

He thinks that he can hear Donghyuck smirk at him. “You’re not single anymore.”

There’s a little tap on the ring just barely fitting on his finger. Jeno looks at it, the metal gleaming under the lights. When he gazes up at Donghyuck, the producer has an almost wistful look in his eyes.

“You’re married now, Jen.” Donghyuck gives a tiny smile. Jeno knows that one a bit too well. 

“It’s a week,” Jeno replies, pulling up a report on his laptop. He’s already standing up. “Not forever. Hyuck, I have a meeting in a few. I’ll talk to you later, yes?”

Donghyuck nods, putting his hands on his hips. He tilts his head towards the meeting room. “Go to that meeting. I’ll text you something later, okay?”

Jeno narrows his eyes at him for a moment, but says his goodbye. He rounds the corner to go towards the meeting room, laptop in his arms. Whatever it was, he’s going to find out later anyways. 

Unconsciously, he taps a rhythm out on his laptop with his ringed finger.

After his last meeting of the day, Jeno looks at the watch on his wrist. Half past 3 already. There’s a few more things he’s going to have to finish before the day ends, and he knows he has enough time. He thinks of grabbing something to munch on from the pantry, so he heads there, laptop still in hand.

At the breakroom, he finds Mark, stirring his cup of noodles. Mark smiles up at him, holding up the cup in his hands. Even though Mark has a higher position now, he’s still casual around Jeno. And he definitely still prefers simple pleasures like a cup of spicy ramen in the middle of the day. Not much has really changed.

“Have you eaten, Jeno?” Mark asks, eyeing him. “I know you forget to when there’s a huge project.”

Jeno winces, setting his laptop down on the counter. “I promise I’m gonna try to get food into my system now.”

“Oh, already finished the one Nana sent over? I met him on my way out earlier for a briefing.”

Furrowing his brows, Jeno asks, “Who’s Nana and what did he send over, exactly?”

The communications manager brings up the cup to take a sip. “Jaemin? Sorry, got used to calling him Nana.” He lifts up some noodles with his chopsticks. “I asked him what he was doing on this floor and he said that he was just gonna give you food.”

Oh. Jaemin giving him food? He knew nothing about that. Jeno closes the cupboard he was about to get his own instant ramen from. 

“I didn’t...know about that. Was at a meeting.” He shakes his head, trying to wrap his mind around the idea. “Uh. I guess I’m gonna go eat that.”

Mark laughs at him, his eyes flitting upwards. “Go then. Might be cold now, but at least it’s free food.”

Jeno nods, grabbing his laptop and making his way out. He says his goodbyes, and Mark waves at him from inside the breakroom.

He wasn’t sure if Mark was aware of their whole “arrangement”, but he supposes that the communications manager got wind of it somehow. News travels fast around here, especially concerning one of the most loved YouTube series (even for the employees). He wonders what Mark thought of Jaemin bringing him food.

Reaching his desk in a few minutes, he sees it. On his desk is a paper bag from Isaac Toast, a note stuck to the front. 

He sits on his chair, scooting towards his desk. The note reads: _Didn’t know if you ate already, but here’s some more food! Hyuck told me you skip meals sometimes, I hope you don’t do that, okay? (ó﹏ò｡) I’ll come over and feed you if I have to! (∗´꒳`)_ ♡ - _Jaemin_

It makes a smile spread across his face. He takes the note off and pins it on the board that goes behind his work computer. Just to remind himself that Jaemin might force-feed him in the near future if he skips meals again.

“So, I’ve just gotten back to my desk after some meetings,” he narrates into the camera. “Jaemin has given me food. He even put a note on it.”

Panning the camera down, he lets it linger for a bit so that the words could be read. Afterwards, he reaches into the paper bag.

He finds that the food box still feels warm to the touch when he takes it out. “He’s so good to me, I can’t believe it.”

Jeno doesn’t know how much he’s starving until he bites down on the sandwich, sighing to himself. He’s not sure if Jaemin did a little more research or he was just able to guess Jeno’s usual order, but either way, he’s grateful.

Taking out his phone from his bag, he sees that he has a couple missed calls from him, so Jeno opens up their messages.

 **[** ♡ **HUBBY** ♡ **]** **  
** **Hey** **  
** **Thank u for the food!** **  
** **U really didn’t have to though** **  
** **Sorry for missing your calls too**

 **[COOL DAD]** **  
** **Ofc I have to!** **  
** **Ur my husband, I need to take care of u, u know** **  
** **And it’s fine about the calls** **  
** **I learned u were in a meeting when I got to ur desk** **  
** **It’s fine!** ♡  
**Eat up, I know meetings are vv tiring (｡•́︿•̀｡)**

Jeno thinks that Jaemin is just about the most charming person in the world, and might even be capable of getting the whole world in the palm of his hand if he wanted to. He had long known that the man was a charmer, a friend to everyone, a smooth talker like no other. The Sales department has been trying to get him for years, but Jaemin has always chosen his current job. Jeno never really knew the reasons, and Donghyuck didn’t either.

And he’s so sweet. Jeno has been with him for a little more than 24 hours and already the man has done so much. He’s helped Jeno into his jacket that morning, checked that Jeno had everything he needed for the day before leaving the house, had texted him almost as soon as he settled at his desk, and now has bought him food. Of course, Jeno doesn’t know if it’s all just for the sake of the vlog, but it makes him happy all the same.

A small, selfish part of him wishes it wasn’t. Not that he’ll ever voice that, but he’s going to admit that he wants it to be something real. The goal for the video was to be as realistic as possible, and he’s been doing most everything like it’s real. Like this thing between them is real, even though he’s well aware that it isn’t, and will never be.

Just a little over a day in, and Jeno already knows he’s going to miss this once it’s over. He shouldn’t think about it, really, not when they’re only on the second day. Not when he promised to himself that this wouldn’t happen.

Donghyuck had gone and set him up with Na Jaemin, who he hasn’t been able to resist, ever, and he doesn’t know if he should consider it a blessing. Probably not, when Jeno has already been having difficulty with handling that winner of a smile, when he knows that Jaemin is going to secure himself a spot in Jeno’s heart all too easily. 

He looks down at his hand, where the ring is. It’s probably never going to really fit, but the sight makes something in him feel different. He can’t quite explain it yet. It’s just a little prickle of something, deep in his bones.

Years ago, when his sister got married, he stood at the side, thinking that he might never truly understand loving someone enough to want to marry them. When he visits his parents, he watches how they move like a unit, in sync even when they’re not aware of it. And both his sister and mother argue with their husbands every now and then, but there is a look in their eyes that continues to be warm. Jeno didn’t know if he would be able to hold that same gaze, or ever be truly in sync with anyone. He didn’t know if he could ever quite have that devotion.

There were many things he didn’t quite understand, but maybe that was for another time. A time where it isn’t like this anymore.

Jeno doesn’t want to think about it just yet.

As he opens his laptop, his phone pings. Upon checking, it’s the message that Donghyuck promised he’d send.

 **[CHOCO DUCK]** **  
****dinner with me and renjun on thurs** **  
** **we’ll send details to you both :***

♡

“I need to do some groceries today,” Jaemin says, fastening his seatbelt. They’ve just picked up Jisung from the daycare, and are getting ready to go home.

“Oh, yeah, sure.” Jeno reaches over to the backseat, giving Jisung a squishy dolphin toy. “I’ll push the cart. Jisung, did you hear that? We’re going to do groceries!”

Jaemin barely stifles the giggle rising in his throat at how excited Jeno is. It’s cute, how he’s pumped about doing groceries.

“Growsee?” Jisung pipes up, now shaking the toy in his hands.

“Yes, groceries!”

The drive there is filled with nursery rhymes and some small talk. Jaemin can tell that Jeno’s shoulders are showing exhaustion in how they’re set, even as his voice remains lively as ever. If he wasn’t stealing glances every now and then at stoplights, he would have never noticed. He guesses it was part of Jeno’s job of being a project coordinator. He couldn’t sound tired, even during his off hours.

Jeno tells him about Hyuck’s proposal to have dinner with them. Jaemin had received a similar text from Renjun, and he had already checked his own schedule for it. He needed to check with Jaehyun first if he could babysit Renjun for a few hours before he said anything final.

Arriving at the grocery, Jaemin carries Jisung out while Jeno roots in the trunk for the shopping bags that Jaemin uses for groceries. Together, they walk towards the brightly lit store, taking a deep breath in the chilly airconditioning that greeted them.

With Jisung sitting in the cart and one of the cameras set up to film him while the other is with Jaemin, they set out into the aisles.

“We’re doing grocery shopping!” Jaemin says brightly into his camera, turning it to show Jeno walking beside him. “I’m gonna have to buy some more laundry detergent, and Jisungie’s soap, and then food for us.”

Jeno nods as he lists them out, dutifully pushing the cart and gently taking Jisung’s hands away from his mouth. The baby is suddenly interested in the necklace hanging around Jeno’s neck, so Jeno leans forward a little to let him play with it.

“Look who’s adjusting to fatherhood well,” Jaemin tells the camera, some distance away. Over his shoulder, he’s filming Jisung being enamored with the necklace and abandoning his dolphin toy completely. “They’re cute.”

He grabs the detergent and soap first, putting them in a far corner where Jisung can’t reach from his seat. Jaemin gets baby powder and wipes as well, stocking on enough to last a few weeks. Letting Jisung hold onto the wipes so that he’s distracted, they wheel into the next set of aisles.

Usually, he gets just enough food for the both of them every week, but with Jeno living with them now, he bumps up the amount of food he gets. He’s still not sure what Jeno likes, and has a feeling that Jeno would let him pick whatever for meals, so he trails behind a little, observing what Jeno’s eyes wander to. Jaemin gets some cereal, ingredients for cookies, and a good amount of meat. Jisung’s eyes widen at the sight of fruit snacks when Jaemin waves it in front of his face, leaving behind the packet of wipes to hold onto the snacks.

In the produce section, Jaemin holds out a few items, asking Jisung what they were. His son can answer most of them, piping up with “apple!” and “owange!” and “cawot!”. However, when he holds up a pineapple, Jisung only tilts his head at him, pouting as he tries to think of what it could be. When he can’t seem to identify it, Jeno supplies the answer for him.

“Pineapple,” Jeno says gently. “Say ‘pineapple’, Jisung.”

Jisung turns to look at him, his eyes following the syllables. “Pine…”

“Pineapple,” Jeno repeats, his eyes widening and his head bobbing as he enunciates every syllable.

“Pine...apo,” Jisung attempts. Jeno rewards him with a smile.

“That’s right!” 

“Pineapo!” Jisung exclaims, bouncing in his seat. He looks proud of himself, his whole face lighting up. Jaemin can’t help but grin at the sight.

Later, as Jaemin is getting some frozen food, Jeno comes up beside him, pressing the icy packages onto the top of Jisung’s head before putting them in a basket nestled in the cart. “Hyuck said that Jisung gets really talkative once he’s comfortable with the person,” Jeno says, a question in his tone.

Jaemin nods, putting a package of rice cakes into the cart. “He really is a talkative baby. Just you wait, he’s gonna talk your ears off soon enough.”

This makes Jeno chuckle. They finish the grocery run with Jaemin putting two pints of ice cream into their cart before starting to walk towards the cashiers. Jeno follows along, wheeling a giggling Jisung forward.

By the time they’ve checked out everything, Jisung is already nestled in Jaemin’s arms, head nuzzling into the crook of his neck. Jeno offers to carry out all the grocery bags, even though Jaemin says he can handle holding a few. He doesn’t allow it, taking hold of all the bags and starting to walk towards the door. Jaemin has no choice but to follow, thanking the cashier with a smile before leaving.

As Jeno loads the bags into the trunk, Jaemin carefully transfers Jisung into his car seat. The baby flinches from the movement, but stays asleep as Jaemin buckles him in. Still tightly clutched in his hand is his dolphin toy. It’s still a wonder to him how one moment, Jisung could be lively and laughing, and then the next he’s fast asleep.

The drive home is quiet, Jeno humming along to a song that’s playing on the radio. Jaemin relishes in the quiet, even if it won’t last for too long.

He knew that silences like this weren’t going to be comfortable right off the bat, and that was okay. Both of them were people who had communication as such a vital part of their jobs. They had some time to work on the quiet.

Arriving home, Jeno insists on getting the groceries inside as Jaemin attends to Jisung. The baby is somewhat awake now, rubbing at his eyes as Jaemin carries him out and sets him down. Jisung takes his hand, walking towards the front door. Jeno follows after them, carrying in the bags.

Jaemin lets Jisung flop down on the couch as he helps Jeno with the groceries. He sets aside some ingredients for _jajangmyeon_ , putting away the rest. Jeno goes to the living room to check on the baby as Jaemin starts preparing the food. 

His son is very nearly drooping off into sleep during dinner, his eyes blinking sleepily as he spoons _jajangmyeon_ into his mouth. Jaemin and Jeno both laugh at the sight, with Jaemin taking a video of his son starting to nod off.

Surprisingly, he was still able to finish off his food and his cup of warm milk without falling completely asleep. Jeno offers to wash the dishes again, and Jaemin remembers he hasn’t made a chore schedule yet. He gets Jisung to the bathroom to clean him up, making a mental note to do the schedule before he settles in for sleep later.

Jisung is slightly more awake after his bath, giggling when Jaemin dries his hair. He keeps trying to crawl up and touch Jaemin’s face, his little hands becoming grabby every now and then. Jaemin manages to get him into his pajamas, coming out of it with his own bathrobe slightly open and his hair mussed up. Frankly, he’s too tired for a bedtime story, but it’s not like Jisung would allow a night without one.

He at least is able to get into his pajama pants before Jisung is whining for the story, so he climbs into bed and lets his son settle on his lap. There’s a tuft of hair on his head that won’t smooth down no matter what Jaemin does, so he idly twirls it around a finger as he opens the storybook.

“There was once a little kitty that slept in his crib…”

They’ve made it halfway through the story when Jeno strides into the room, very much shirtless, towelling off his hair. It’s almost like he doesn’t know the two of them are there as he walks over to the dresser where Jaemin’s cleared a drawer for him. As he roots around for a shirt, Jaemin has a full view of his back tattoos.

There’s a few different ones, almost intertwined together to become a story on skin. A dragon winds itself up his spine, dark and scaly. Smoke surrounds the dragon, seeming to threaten to enclose over it, but he’s only rising from it. In the middle of his shoulders, there’s what seems to be the sun, luring the dragon towards it. The swirls from Jeno’s arms continue to his back, as if enclosing him in something dark. Jaemin feels like he’s holding his breath as he looks at him.

Jisung seems to notice that he’s distracted, also looking up. There’s a squeak from him, and he’s scrambling to get up. “Appa, appa!”

Jaemin snaps himself out of it. “Yes?”

“What’s that?” Jisung asks, pointing to Jeno’s back. Jeno turns at that moment, made aware that Jisung is most likely talking about him.

Pulling the baby to him, Jaemin lowers his hand. “Jisung, it’s bad to just point at people like that okay? Don’t do that, please.”

He looks up at him, pouting. There’s a crease between his brows, and Jaemin kisses it.

Jeno sits down on the bed, looking at them both. “I haven’t shown him yet,” he says, looking like he wants to reach out to Jisung. “I can show him now.”

Jaemin nods, letting go of his son. Jeno turns around dutifully, letting tiny hands touch the dark ink on his skin.

“That’s a dragon, Jisung, do you see?” Jeno asks, his tone soft. “Do you like dragons?”

The baby doesn’t reply, too focused on tracing the shapes. He seems confused on why there are marks on Jeno’s skin, but he doesn’t say anything. Just roams his hand over the expanse, trying to make sense of it.

“Jisung, do you see that circle at the top?” Jisung nods, one hand coming up to touch. “That’s the sun. You like the sun, right?”

“Big sun,” Jisung mumbles, coming up on his tiptoes to look at it a bit better.

“Yes, it’s a very big sun.”

Without much thought, Jaemin reaches out to touch as well, as gently as possible. He thinks he imagines the way that Jeno’s breath hitches at the contact. Jisung must have touched somewhere sensitive. With a finger, he traces the graceful lines, beautiful against his cold skin. 

“They’re tattoos, Jisung. Can you say _tattoo_?”

“Tattoo.”

“That’s perfect! Do you like them, Jisung? I have a lot of them, huh?”

“I like them,” Jaemin whispers, loud enough to hear. “They’re beautiful.”

Jeno’s skin warms under his barely-there touch. The more Jaemin explores, the more details he finds. There’s Roman numerals following the line of Jeno’s spine, cutting through the dragon. A set of flowers wind around the swirls at the front of his torso, very alive in their inked glory. There are letters that follow the swirls down his arms, and Jaemin doesn’t quite know what the words that they form mean.

“You do?” Jeno gets out, his shoulders tensing a little. 

Jaemin puts a hand between them, slowly massaging the tension away. “Yes.” It’s a little funny how breathless he sounds, just from tracing the ink on Jeno’s skin. “I love them.”

Jeno turns around, and for a torturing long moment, they only stare at each other. There’s something in his eyes, something Jaemin can’t place. It’s like neither of them breathe in that moment, however short it may have actually been. There’s the sound of a heartbeat in Jaemin’s ears, and he’s not quite sure who it belongs to.

The moment is broken by Jisung whining. “Appa.” He’s bouncing, in that impatient way of his. “Sungie wants.”

He turns to his son, blinking at him. It takes a bit before he understands what Jisung is trying to say, and his mouth drops open to say an “Ah.”

Cradling Jisung to him, he says, “We can try to get you tattoos, too.” After all, Jaemin saw some temporary ones in a bookstore a few days ago. “Would you like that, Jisung-ah?”

Jisung nods excitedly, toppling into Jaemin’s lap. He pulls himself up just a bit, reaching out to touch Jeno once more. “Like his, appa.”

Jaemin nods, resting his chin on the top of his baby’s head. “We can try.”

Offering a little smile, Jeno squeezes Jisung’s hand. “Let’s get you tattoos, buddy.”

The baby claps at this, his giggle loud in the room. Jeno looks at him straight on, willing him to focus on his gaze.

“But we should sleep first, yeah? It’s getting late, Jisung.”

Jisung nods again, turning around to latch onto Jaemin. Moving to stand up, Jaemin secures his hold on his son, starting to rock him as soon as he’s off the bed.

“You were really tired today, Jisung-ah. It’s time to sleep now,” he says softly, stroking his son’s head. “We’re going to have more fun tomorrow.”

There’s another tiny nod at his shoulder, and the arms around him start to slack a little. 

“Goodnight, Jisung-ah,” Jaemin tells him, swaying gently. He can feel a mumbled reply against his skin.

Soon enough, Jisung is finally asleep. He’s fought through his drowsiness for a few hours now, and Jaemin is glad that he finally gets to _really_ sleep. Setting him down carefully, Jaemin rubs some of the lavender sleep oil on him again before pressing a kiss on his forehead and pulling the blankets up.

Jeno is already in bed, the covers up to his waist as he blinks owlishly at Jaemin. It’s only then that Jaemin realizes he still hasn’t put on a shirt. He rifles through his drawers and pulls out the first shirt he can find, slipping it over his head.

Settling into bed, he rubs some of the oil on his temples and wrists as well. He offers the bottle to Jeno wordlessly, who declines. Shrugging, Jaemin puts the bottle into his drawer, pulling up the covers on his side.

“He just knocked out, huh?” Jeno says, eyes going over to the cot. “He really was tired.”

Jaemin laughs softly. “A lot happened today, apparently.”

They’re quiet for a bit, and Jaemin doesn’t miss how their fingers almost touch above the covers. He had already forgotten what it was like to hold Jeno’s hands in his, even if he held them tightly on the day of their “wedding”. They were strong and steady, he knew, but he didn’t quite recall much of anything else about it.

“What do people do before they go to bed?” Jeno blurts out, but it looks like he wants to take it back. It makes Jaemin snicker, his eyebrows going up.

“Why, Jeno, do you wanna do something before bed?” he asks, putting a slight lilt to his voice. He delights in the way it makes Jeno flush, just enough to be seen in the dim lamplight.

“No, I didn’t mean it like that —”

Leaning in and flashing his best smile, Jaemin asks “What did you mean, then, honey?”

He thinks Jeno might have thrown a pillow at him, given the chance. “Oh my god. Do not call me honey.”

Jaemin pulls back, leaning against his pillows. “What do you want then? Baby? Sweetie? Honeybunch? My one and only?”

Jeno fakes gagging. “None of those, thanks.”

The smile returns on Jaemin’s lips. “Honey.” He savors the way it makes Jeno cringe. “What did you want to do?”

“Forget it, I’m going to sleep.” Jeno quickly adjusts himself so he’s lying down, pulling the covers up to cover his face. Jaemin chuckles, doing the same.

Under the covers, he grins at Jeno. “You need to voice out what you want, honey.”

Jeno scrunches his nose, but he doesn’t turn away. He sighs, and this close, Jaemin can feel it. “What do I call you?”

“Anything you want.”

He seems to think it over, his eyes looking at a point over Jaemin’s ear. “How about Nana?”

That softens Jaemin’s teasing smile. “Nana is fine.”

Jeno is quiet for a heartbeat more, and Jaemin suppresses the urge to boop his nose. Or kiss it. He really shouldn’t be allowed to be this close to him.

“Goodnight, Nana,” Jeno breathes, finally turning away from him.

Jaemin doesn’t do the same. Instead, he stares at the bleached blonde head, the broad shoulders underneath the shirt. He thinks of the tattoos spanning his back.

He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath. “Goodnight, Jeno.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leave a kudos or some feedback, if you want! it means a lot to me ♡
> 
> talk to me over at [twt](https://twitter.com/evnsangcvlt) or [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/evnsangcvlt)


	3. easy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i got multiple headaches while writing this chapter but i think it's my favorite one so far,,,,,,,,

**『** **_Darling, can't you see_ ** **_  
_** **_I'm a broken man_ ** **_  
_** **_With addictive tendencies_ ** **_  
_** **_And I think I love you_ ** **_  
_** **_But I don't ever think I can_ ** **_  
_** **_Ever learn how to love just right_ ** **_  
_** **_So run away from me_ ** **_  
_** **_Run as far as your_ ** **_  
_** **_Dark brown eyes can see_ ** **』**

♡

**DAY 3**

At the sound of a whimpered, “Appa,” Jaemin nearly shoots up into a sitting position. Eyes adjusting in the dark, he sees Jisung sitting up in his cot, hands on the edge and a frown on his face. 

“Hey,” Jaemin says softly, moving to get out of bed. “What’s wrong, Jisung-ah?”

Wordlessly, his son only stretches his arms out, reaching for him. Jaemin is in front of him in an instant, scooping him up. Jisung whines into his neck, clinging tightly to him. As always, Jaemin rubs his back soothingly, holding his son securely to himself.

“What is it?” he tries again. He’s answered by something that feels like a shake of the head against his neck, and a dampness on his skin. “Okay, it’s alright. I’m here. I’m here, Jisung.”

Jaemin can feel Jeno look at them, most likely roused by Jaemin’s sudden movements. He feels guilty at waking him up, knowing that he must have been tired from his day before and is now waking up at ungodly hours.

There’s movement from Jisung, who seems to want to cling tighter onto him. Jaemin holds him closer, starting to rock him gently. With how Jisung is still squirming, he guesses it might take a while to get him back to sleep.

When he turns, he’s met with the same gaze Jeno had the previous day, questioning if he needs any help. Jaemin again smiles and shakes his head. 

His feet carry him easily to the window, humming the first lullaby that comes to mind. Jisung is still restless, pulling away to look around.

“Hey there,” Jaemin says, reaching up to wipe the tear streaks away. “Are you okay?”

Jisung seems to contemplate that, some fingers in his mouth. He’s looking somewhere, his breath hitching every now and then but no tears come out anymore. Waiting patiently, Jaemin lets his son do some self-soothing for the moment.

When Jisung finally speaks up, all he says is, “Appa’s bed.”

“You want to sleep in appa’s bed?” Jaemin asks, resuming the soothing rubs on his back.

Nodding, Jisung wraps his arms around his neck again, snuggling close. Jaemin obliges, carrying him over to the bed, where Jeno is still looking at them with worry in his eyes. He looks like he wants to reach out to receive Jisung into his arms, but is unsure if he should. When they come closer, Jeno seems to snap out of it, scooting over to make room.

Jaemin sets Jisung down, cradling his head as he does. Curious eyes look up at him, and Jisung’s hands attempt to pull him down with him. He settles down beside his son, letting the tiny grabby hands clutch at his shirt. Gently, he brushes back Jisung’s tufts of hair, resuming his humming of the lullaby.

Opposite him, Jeno is now propped up on his elbow, looking at them both. There’s something soft in his expression as he does, like he’s witnessing something that he wants to commit to his memory.

“You have to let me help with him,” Jeno whispers, eyes still following the movement of Jaemin’s hand. “I promise to try my best.”

And it’s so sincere, so painfully innocent, that Jaemin can’t stop the smile that tilts the corners of his mouth upwards. He’s not sure he’s met anyone who’s quite as willing to help with his son like Jeno, and it makes something prickle at his chest.

“Okay,” he answers, momentarily using his hand to make an up and down motion against Jisung’s side. “You can do this.”

Jeno nods a bit eagerly, reaching out to copy the motion. Jaemin goes back to cradling Jisung’s head, leaning closer to almost whisper the lullaby. The baby’s eyes are drooping closed, his hands losing their grip in the fabric of Jaemin’s shirt.

He’s tired, Jaemin can tell. It’s hard to tell what woke him up in the first place, but it looks like Jisung is barely fighting to keep awake at this point. Jaemin wishes he knew somehow, could help him better than how he’s doing now. Jisung rarely if ever asked to sleep in bed with him, and he can’t make out why he’d want to do it now.

When he’s moments away from completely dropping off into sleep, Jaemin gently eases him down onto his back, staying close the entire time. Jisung goes easily without protest, even when one of his hands hold onto Jaemin’s fingers the entire time. Jaemin doesn’t take them away, only kisses the tiny fingers wrapped around his as he whispers a goodnight.

Usually, Jaemin would crash into sleep as well, the worry and exhaustion from the day before knocking him out. But something about Jeno still gently making soothing rubs against his son’s side makes him want to stay up for a bit longer.

Not looking up, Jeno says, “You’re worried.” It’s not a question, but Jaemin feels like he should answer all the same.

“Yeah.” He gazes down at his son, whose lashes still have tiny drops of tears in them. “He’s been… Well, this doesn’t happen too often now.”

A thumb rubs over Jisung’s tiny fist. “Is it because I’m here? Is he just not comfortable with that?”

Jaemin looks at him at that, but he can’t see his expression. All he sees is the moonlight making his hair appear almost silvery in the light, and some of the dark ink on his shoulders. He’s quiet for a bit, admittedly distracted, before he snaps out of it and says, “I don’t know.”

He really doesn’t. This hasn’t happened before, but then again, it’s not like he’s invited anyone over like this. Still, it didn’t seem like Jisung was waking up because of his presence, which is quiet and careful at every moment possible. Jaemin truly does not have an explanation for it.

Jeno tilts his head slightly, eyes still on the baby. He lets out a small sigh. “I never really knew how to do all this.”

A part of Jaemin wants to reach out to him, soothe him too. “That’s okay. I’m just learning along the way, too.”

There’s a nod, and Jaemin watches as Jeno smoothes back the ever-errant tufts of Jisung’s hair. He’s quiet, and Jaemin struggles to keep himself awake. He feels like there’s more that Jeno wants to say, and he wants to listen to it.

When Jeno finally retracts his hand, folding it close to himself, he says, “I never really thought about being a dad.”

Jaemin blinks at him. “I’m sorry you got reeled into this.”

Jeno opens his mouth, splutters for a bit. “No, no, I - “ He shakes his head, as if clearing it. His eyes are bright in the faint moonlight. “I’m okay with this, really, it’s just that I never considered it before. It wasn’t something that I really thought about.”

Biting his lip, Jaemin fiddles with his fingers, interlocking them and letting go. “Understandable. Not everyone wants a kid, or is ready for one. It’s okay.”

“Did you have thoughts about it?” Jeno asks carefully. “Were you...ready?”

It makes Jaemin huff out a small laugh. “Yes and no.” He gazes back down on his son, his peaceful sleeping form. It’s almost like he never woke up from his sleep in the first place. “I don’t think anyone can truly be ready for becoming a parent.”

At this, Jeno nods. Jaemin is relieved at how it seems like he won’t prod anymore for now. “We should sleep,” Jeno says gently. “We need to get up pretty early.”

Jaemin agrees with this. They both settle into bed, giving ample space for Jisung to move around as they do so. The position is awkward, they both know, but neither complain.

Almost at the same time as him, Jeno reaches out a hand to brush against Jisung’s head. Their fingers touch instead, and Jeno looks at him. Jaemin smiles softly, deciding split-second to hold Jeno’s hand in his.

He doesn’t know why he does this, but it’s not like he can take it back anymore. They’re pressed palm to palm, and Jaemin’s thumb moves across the back of Jeno’s hand instinctively. Dark, curious eyes look back and forth from their hands and his face. Jeno seems like he was thinking of saying something, but Jaemin finds the words before he does.

“Thank you.” He says it quietly enough that he’s not sure if Jeno heard. “You’re so good, Jeno.”

Words were never his strongest suit at 2 in the morning, but Jaemin wishes that it was enough for Jeno to understand. He was good, too good, and Jaemin isn’t sure he can handle more of it over the week. 

Now, with his eyelids feeling heavy and his senses slipping away from him, Jaemin fights the urge to do more, to pull Jeno in. It’s been far too long, and just their hands together makes him ache.

“Goodnight,” Jeno says, but he doesn’t move to pull away. “Goodnight, Nana.”

The name makes Jaemin smile. He closes his eyes, nodding. Like he’s saying yes to him calling him that. Like he’s giving him permission to take back his hand and turn his back to sleep.

But Jeno doesn’t. Jaemin falls asleep mere moments later, still unable to process that completely.

Some hours later, Jaemin wakes up to the feeling of small feet digging into his side, and his bleary eyes register Jisung clambering up Jeno to palm over his face. He hears a chuckle from Jeno, who says a garbled morning greeting to the baby as he tries to sit up. There are some questions from Jeno that Jaemin cannot comprehend right now, and Jisung seems to answer enthusiastically.

The pair get out of bed, with Jisung in Jeno’s arms. The last thought Jaemin has before he drifts back to sleep (just 10 more minutes, swear) is that he doesn’t remember the last time Jisung has gone with a relative stranger that easily.

♡

The thing about Na Jaemin, Jeno has realized, is that it seems like it’s physically impossible for him to look like crap. Even now, with him coming out of the bedroom with a drowsy scowl and his brown hair sticking out everywhere, Jeno feels like he’s looking at the sun. That just isn’t fair.

He forces himself to focus on making the vegetable omelette and not spill all over the counter because he’s been staring at Jaemin for too long. Jeno greets him brightly, albeit not looking up from the mixing bowl. It’s too early for him to already start to lose his grip.

Instead of staying with Jisung to play like the previous morning, Jaemin only gives his son a greeting kiss and a little squeeze before he’s walking to the kitchen. An arm goes around Jeno’s shoulders, and Jeno has to make sure his breathing isn’t obvious.

“Morning,” Jaemin says, all too close to his ear. “ _Gaeran mari_?”

Jeno hums in response, transferring the diced ham and vegetables into the beaten eggs. “Jisung picked out the eggs, so.”

He can practically feel Jaemin’s growing smile. The arm around him pulls him in closer, and Jeno has never been much of a religious man, but he might start praying now. “Sounds good! I’ll look through the leftover meat we have, and I’ll make some fried rice.”

Trying his hardest not to let out a relieved sigh when Jaemin releases him to root through the fridge, Jeno puts aside his egg mixture to look for a pan. He locates a nicely-sized one from one of the cupboards, and Jaemin hands him the butter and a pack of _gim_ . They work together as efficiently as they can manage, with Jaemin popping the microwaveable container of leftover _bulgogi_ in the microwave and starting up on his fried rice while Jeno made three separate omelettes. Every now and then, they’d bump shoulders or hips, and Jaemin’s chuckle followed by an apology makes Jeno want to close his eyes and take a few deep breaths.

Jisung wanders into the kitchen at some point, all too curious why they seem to be having fun without him. Jaemin hoists him up, popping a leftover slice of carrot into his mouth to munch on. Soon enough, Jisung is reaching out towards Jeno, and after some babbling, Jeno realizes he wants some of the _gim_. The piece that Jeno hands over crumples easily in Jisung’s fist, soon getting stuffed into his mouth.

Jaemin absolutely _glows_ when he shows Jisung the food, putting some of the rice in a spoon for his son to taste. Even when he’s not completely smiling, there’s just something about his face that makes it feel like he is. He nuzzles his nose into Jisung’s cheek, eliciting giggles from the baby, and Jeno is very much endeared. It takes him Jaemin’s gentle reminder that his eggs are getting cooked for him to snap out of it, and he silently chides himself for being distracted that easily.

It was hard, when Jeno was very much awake as Jaemin had held his hand some hours before. He could tell that Jaemin was close to falling asleep on him, but was fighting it for some reason. The contact was probably unintentional, something he didn’t quite think through. He even thanked Jeno, saying he was good. If Jeno wasn’t so aware of everything in that moment, he might have missed it.

Jaemin’s hand was strong, stable, and warm. It didn’t matter that he may have been delirious from drowsiness, he was still very present and it didn’t seem like he wavered in the slightest. That hand had soothed his son thousands of times, had cradled that little round head with all the care in the world, had wiped away all those tears. Jeno found himself thinking about it, thinking about if he can feel that gentleness as well.

Now, with Jaemin blowing raspberries into Jisung’s arm, their wrinkled pajamas and their smiles that match, Jeno wonders even more if he can truly fit into this home of two. He wants to, of course, but he doesn’t know if he can or if he deserves that just yet.

At breakfast, Jaemin whines about Jisung very obviously favoring Jeno today, letting him put the bites of food on his spoon and even insisting that Jeno guide the spoon into his mouth. Jaemin is saying something about Jisung suddenly picking favorites, and Jisung giggles at his father’s pouting. It’s hard to bite back the grins that spread across his face, so Jeno doesn’t really bother anymore.

Jaemin also gapes a bit at his son for wordlessly asking Jeno to hold up his sippy cup of juice for him, even when both are well aware that Jisung can hold it on his own. All Jaemin really gets at breakfast is sticky hands on the front of his shirt and Jisung pointedly ignoring him, which is hilarious to see.

It’s on Jisung’s last bite of rice that Jaemin snaps a photo of them. Jeno protests that he wasn’t ready for it, but it doesn’t seem like Jaemin is listening at all. He looks pleased as a cat, and Jeno just lets it slide.

He feels like he’s gonna let a lot of things slide if it comes to Na Jaemin.

Like when that hand is suddenly on his back, subtly pushing him towards the bathroom and saying that he’ll take care of the dishes and “Jisung looks like he’s going to come with you today.” Jisung does, his hand dwarfed in Jeno’s own, excitedly tugging him towards the bathroom. Jaemin only chuckles at the sight, shooing them away.

In the bathroom, with Jisung’s head full of suds and his rubber squeaky toy thrown halfway across the bathroom floor, Jeno gently pokes at the baby’s soft cheeks. Jisung doesn’t seem to even notice, too engrossed in making his two rubber duckies kiss.

The baby starts to sing a song, most likely from one of the kids’ shows he watches, tilting his head from left to write as he dances along to the music in his head. Jeno doesn’t quite recognize it, but he tries to hum along as he scrubs the milky baby soap over Jisung’s arms and torso, making sure that he gets all of his sticky fingers. Jisung has his own world, barely minding Jeno as he works, only disrupting the relative peace to splash around every now and then.

The front of Jeno’s shirt is pretty soaked by the time he reaches for the showerhead to rinse off the playing tot in the tub. He thinks he should go shower next, as he’s going to be walking around the house with his damp clothes sticking to him otherwise.

Jisung squirms at the first hit of the water on him, sloshing enough of the water out of the tub to wet Jeno’s pajama pants. Yup, he’s definitely going to go next. The baby takes some time to settle down and get used to the gentle stream of water on him, right after he’s grabbed at Jeno’s shirt and face and arms with sopping wet hands. Jeno manages to make sure he doesn’t slip as he’s moving around, getting him to sit down again as he makes sure all of the soap is washed away.

When he reaches for the towel, Jisung is peering up at him, pointing out his towel with the bear hoodie. As Jeno moves to wrap it around him and lift him out the tub to drip on the mats, Jisung mumbles something.

“What did you say, Jisung-ah?” Jeno asks him, using the towel to dry his body. “I didn’t hear.”

“Appa friend?” Jisung questions, his tiny hand emerging from the towel to rest on Jeno’s shoulder.

This makes Jeno smile. “Yes, I’m appa’s friend.”

Pouting, Jisung considers this, with all the deep thought of a two-year old. When he looks up again, it’s like he’s had a revelation. “Appa likes you.”

Jeno couldn’t fight down the rising blush if he tried. It’s a good thing that Jisung doesn’t seem to understand what’s happening, only placing his palms on Jeno’s cheeks.

“Uh, yeah, I guess he does,” Jeno says lamely, at a loss for anything else to say. Jisung accepts this, bouncing on the bathroom floor so that he can be lifted into Jeno’s arms. Jeno complies easily, hoisting him up to carry him out of the bathroom.

Jaemin is rooting through the drawers for Jisung’s outfit of the day, his back turned to them as he looks. Carefully, Jeno sets the tot down on the bed, drying the remnants of the water on him and his hair. Almost on cue, Jisung calls out to his dad, more excited than whining.

“I’ll be there in just a moment!” Jaemin coos, the pieces of clothing slung over his shoulder. He tosses Jeno a diaper, who catches it after some fumbling. 

Lowering a hyper Jisung onto the mattress so that he could put the diaper on him, Jeno silently wonders how parents do this everyday. Jaemin at least comes over to distract the baby while he attempts to put the diaper on, calmly setting Jisung’s moving legs into position as he fastens the tapes at the sides. He can see Jaemin trying to stifle a laugh at his attempt, but Jeno knows he did his best and that’s what matters.

He leaves them to take a shower of his own, ready to get out of soaked, soapy clothes. Turning on the water and letting it beat down on him, he tries not to think. Both the father and the son were perceptive, and rather candid, and Jeno isn’t sure how he’s going to deal.

To the best of his abilities, Jeno washes away the ghosts of a warm, steady hand on him.

♡

“Jaemin!”

He tries his best not to drop his lunch to his table at the sound of that voice calling him. Gently, he sets down his reheated cream pasta, swivelling around in his chair to face the owner of the voice.

Renjun strides up to him, wire-framed glasses high on his nose. He’s not carrying anything with him, so Jaemin is at least safe from another slap on the arm with a folder or a clipboard. In truth, he should be thankful that Renjun hasn’t attempted that with his 12.9 inch iPad.

“Are you ready for tonight?” the producer asks, and the look in his eyes makes Jaemin scared of the fact that he doesn’t know what tonight is supposed to have.

Trying not to furrow his brows, Jaemin racks his brain for what he could have possibly agreed to. There wasn’t going to a company celebration for a while, he knew that. It wasn’t Renjun and Donghyuck’s anniversary either, he knew that was in the fall. No one had asked him to go out for drinks in a while, so that couldn’t be it.

When Renjun raises his brows, clearly waiting for an answer, Jaemin realizes what he’s supposed to remember.

The dinner with them. It was for tonight.

“Oh, uh, I’m not sure I am,” he gets out, swirling his fork in the pasta. “I completely forgot to ask if Jaehyun was okay with babysitting Jisung for the night…”

“That’s alright, bring him!” Renjun slips his phone out of his pocket, swiping through it to show Jaemin something. He turns it around and Jaemin sees a photo of a boy, not that much older than Jisung, sitting in a bright red toy car. “We’re babysitting my little cousin for the week too, so they can have a mini playdate while we have dinner.”

Jaemin knows that it’s a sound proposal, and it’s not like he can really say no to Huang Renjun. “Okay, yeah, we’ll be there.”

“Great!” Renjun looks like he’s about to start clapping his hands. “Just bring yourselves, we’ll take care of the rest.”

And just as suddenly as he’d arrived, he disappears, leaving Jaemin to his lunch and the reports he still has to type up.

Sending a quick text to Jeno reading _dinner with renjun + hyuck later, they want us to bring jisung!_ , Jaemin heaves out a breath. Undoubtedly, the two would try to get some sort of juicy info out of them, like they’re the latest celebrity couple bound to grace the covers of tabloid magazines (Jaemin has seen the graphics department make them for fun every other month; he really does _not_ want to be on there). The couple knew far too many tells on both him and Jeno, and he feels like he’s going to be on the receiving end of some knowing looks.

Not that there’s much of anything to really waggle their eyebrows at. He and Jeno haven’t done anything remarkable, or really something that would probably get Renjun sending Jaemin AO3 links, so they won’t have much to get out of them. They’re just coexisting in that one-storey house and taking care of Jisung together. Nothing special.

However, Jaemin can’t deny that he had held Jeno’s hand for absolutely no reason other than he wanted to. Okay, it was hardly scandalous, but he just doesn’t have quite an explanation for it.

Maybe he wanted to hear those giggles he heard at their wedding ceremony, and see Jeno squirm a bit. It was cute, and Jaemin has wondered if he would ever see it again.

Maybe he just wanted that nice, comforting touch. Nothing much to it.

Out of habit, Jaemin touches the frame on his desk. It holds possibly his favorite photo of Jisung ever, the first time they went to Busan to visit his parents and Jisung played in the waves. He was so tiny then, but with that same wide smile on that dumpling of a face. His favorite person in probably his favorite place. Jaemin’s fingerprints smudge on the glass.

Opening up his sticky notes app on his laptop, he types in: _Get photos developed at end of week._

Staring at the line for a few seconds, just below the one that says _Call electrician to fix heating,_ Jaemin thinks of another one.

_Try to hold Jeno’s hand more._

When Jeno comes to pick him up so they could go down together, Jaemin resists falling against him. The dull ache at his shoulders is a little more noticeable now after quite the day, and he just wants to crash into bed at this point.

Jeno watches as he stretches, trying to alleviate some of the pain. Jaemin thinks he’s going to weird him out if he just tackles him into a hug, so he holds back. Instead, he slings his laptop bag over his shoulder, then slotting his hand into Jeno’s as casually as he can.

At this, Jeno raises his brows, but doesn’t pull away. He never seems to pull away.

“Are you okay?” is the question that he asks, instead of a hundred other ones, including, but not limited to, _Why all of a sudden?_ “Should we really push through with the dinner?”

Jaemin feels the cold metal of Jeno’s ring pressing into his skin. He squeezes reassuringly. “Yes. We need to be grateful to the two that brought us together.”

Chuckling, Jeno squeezes back. “Let’s go, then.”

At the daycare, they go in hand in hand, and Nurse Joy seems a little surprised, but she says nothing. Jaemin has recorded their laughs at the reaction, holding up their joined hands for the camera.

They go hand in hand towards the room where Jisung is, and Jaemin notices the other nurses looking as well. It’s going to be hard to explain to them once their 7 days are over, but he wants to enjoy it for now. Jeno lets himself be tugged along, smiling at everyone they meet on the way.

Jisung bounds up when Jaemin calls for him, immediately walking over and tiptoeing to reach him. Nurse Joy opens the playpen that the kids are in, scooping up Jisung into her arms to bring him over to them.

Once they’re closer, Jisung leans forward to go to Jaemin, and Jeno lets go of his hand. Jaemin mourns the loss silently, reaching out to take Jisung. The tot is all bright eyed and alert, his mouth smeared red from the jelly cups they hand out as a snack here. 

Placing kisses on his cheek, Jaemin greets him, launching into his usual questions. He listens to Jisung’s answers as Jeno fills out the forms for him, signing in his stead. The receptionist blinks owlishly at Jeno, unsure how to react to him after nearly a year of Jaemin casually saying he doesn’t quite plan on dating. Or maybe she’s just plain admiring him, and Jaemin has noticed a lot of people do when it comes to Jeno.

They both smile at her once Jeno’s done, saying their goodbyes. Jaemin holds Jisung’s hand so that he can wave goodbye to all the nurses. They all wave back, still a rather confused expression on their face. Jaemin bites back the giggle rising in his throat.

On the way out, Jaemin tells Jisung they’re going somewhere. The baby perks up immediately, eyes widening.

“Where, appa?”

“We’re going to have dinner at Uncle Junnie’s house!” Securing him with an arm, Jaemin shoves his hand into his pocket and fishes out his keys. He throws them to Jeno, who catches them almost perfectly. “Uncle Junnie said that he’s going to have his little baby cousin there, so you can play with him.”

Jisung gets excited at the magic word. “Play? Sungie will play?”

Nodding, Jaemin answers, “Yes, Jisungie will play today.”

The tot claps excitedly, bouncing in Jaemin’s arms. Jaemin tries his best to calm him down while Jeno unlocks the car.

On a last-minute decision, they decide to go to the first bakery they can find to buy a cake. Jeno is driving tonight, immediately thinking of a nearby bakery that he’s already tried before. Jaemin wonders if they should buy wine too, but a quick text to Renjun tells him that they have enough wine at home already.

Jisung picks out the cake from the display once they get there, a multi-colored chocolate one that looks more suited for a birthday, but nobody questions it. As they wait for the cake to put into a box, Jaemin has to make sure his son doesn’t grab at the sweet treats on the shelves. Jeno buys him a cookie anyways, telling him it’s for tomorrow and combatting his pout with a pout of his own. Jaemin wishes he could take a photo of the sight.

At Renjun’s house, Jisung rings the doorbell one too many times, the sound echoing through the home. They can hear approaching footsteps and voices that undoubtedly belong to the couple. The lacquered white door opens to Renjun, who’s changed into a more relaxed sweater and jeans, a toddler clinging to one of his legs.

“Hey,” he greets, shuffling to the side. “You’re just in time. Hyuck’s just finishing up on dinner.”

They’re ushered inside, Renjun’s eyes widening a bit at the cake box that’s thrust into his hands. Jaemin puts Jisung down and introduces him to the other toddler, the little boy not that much taller than Jisung but seemingly shyer. Renjun introduces him as Chenle, gently getting him off his leg and encouraging him to come closer to the father and son duo.

The kids seem to get to an understanding, with Chenle leading a wide-eyed Jisung to the living room where he has a playmat spread out and a variety of toys everywhere. He first picks up a train set, showing it to a curious Jisung. The younger boy takes it, turning it over in his hands before plopping down on the playmat and starting to play with his new friend.

Renjun comes back with two glasses of wine, urging Jaemin to sit on the couch. Jaemin almost refuses, saying that he’s going to drive. The producer squints at him, saying “Just one. I’m gonna pretend I don’t know about your high alcohol tolerance and let you off easy tonight” and Jaemin is left with no choice.

Sipping at the wine, Renjun leans forward, eyebrows already raised. Jaemin already has a feeling on what he’s about to say.

“So,” Renjun says, voice hushed. “Tell me. Have you smooched or do I have to smack someone?”

♡

Jeno finds himself in the kitchen, even though it doesn’t seem like Hyuck needs any help. He watches as his friend throws a pasta noodle onto the cupboard in front of him, supposedly testing for doneness. He doesn’t know how he can tell like that exactly, but if it works, it works.

The producer is stirring his pot of sauce, bringing the huge spoon up to taste and then rifling through the bottles lined up on a rack to add something to it. Jeno is leaning awkwardly against the kitchen countertop, waiting to see if he’ll be asked to pass anything.

“Ten-hyung at reception said he saw you and Jaemin holding hands on the way out,” Hyuck remarks, back still turned to Jeno. “Said that if he didn’t know that it was for a video, he’d think you look cute together.”

Pursing his lips, Jeno shoves his hands into his pockets. “Thanks for reminding me it was fake.”

Hyuck turns around at this, brandishing his sauce spoon. “Hey. You were the one that insisted on staying aware that none of this was real. I _told_ you that you’re allowed to imagine that it’s real, even just for a little bit.”

It makes Jeno sigh. “I just… don’t know how to do this, Hyuck.” He twists the ring on his finger, still not quite fitting. “I want it to be… real, but if I do that it’s gonna hurt at the end. You know that.”

Exhaling in that way that Jeno knows means that Donghyuck is tired, he shakes his head. “You’re so scared that it’ll hurt in the end when it isn’t even the end yet. Can you please get me the cheese from the fridge? It’s by the door.”

Jeno walks over to their sleek fridge, opening it and looking for the cheese. For a moment, he’s just staring at the four different cheeses there, then asking his friend which one he needs. He hands the parmesan over to a waiting Donghyuck. “Do you honestly think I have a chance with Na Jaemin? Like, do you really, truly think that this can last beyond this video?”

There’s a spoon that’s held out for him, some of the sauce on it for him to taste. Jeno blows on it, taking the spoon into his mouth obediently. “Even if I say yes you’re not going to believe it.” Hyuck takes the spoon back, getting a bit for himself to taste as well. “Why even ask me that?”

Resisting the urge to run a hand down his face, Jeno crosses his arms. He doesn’t have an answer to that. Jeno knew what he thought the answer would be, and he also knew what Donghyuck’s answer would be. He doesn’t know which answer he’d like to hear right now.

Donghyuck turns off the heat for both of the burners, grabbing the pot of pasta and going to the sink to drain the noodles. The steam rises up from the sink as he does. “Do you like being with him?” he asks, voice quiet.

Squeezing at his sides, Jeno says without hesitation, “Yes.”

“Does he push you away or refuse to have any contact with you?”

He furrows his brows. “No, he never - “

“Does it seem like _he’s_ enjoying his time with you?”

Jeno looks down at this. “I… I think so, yeah.” He thinks about that now-familiar smile, and the way Jaemin jokes around easily with him. He thinks of their mornings, always kind of messy and becoming increasingly domestic. He thinks of the nights where they wind down, and the early mornings where they soothe Jisung. They’ve had two so far, but it feels like it’s been a lifetime.

If Donghyuck’s hands weren’t holding the pasta pot, he might have gone over and punched Jeno on the arm. Instead, he sets the pot back onto the stove, lifting the pot with the sauce and pouring all of it onto the noodles. “All I’m gonna tell you is that you shouldn’t get ahead of yourself. Let things happen. He held your hand, right? And you liked it, right?” Jeno isn’t able to answer before his friend barrels on. “Enjoy the little things. Enjoy your time together. Whether or not something happens beyond the week is up to the both of you, but don’t let thoughts of the end dictate whether or not you can be happy in the days to come.”

Okay, Jeno can listen to that. He did want to be happy, did want to enjoy this as much as he could. The doubts, the thoughts that all of this is temporary, all of that may not truly be gone, but he can keep most of them at bay. Jaemin and Jisung didn’t deserve him putting a strain on everything because he was scared.

“Thank you,” he offers, mostly because he can’t think of anything else to say. Donghyuck doesn’t seem to mind it.

“You’re welcome,” Hyuck says firmly, adding more cheese into the pasta he’s stirring. “And stop thinking that you don’t deserve him, okay? That’s not for you to decide.”

Jeno nods at this. He was right, Hyuck somehow always was. “I’ll remember that.”

“Good.” The producer takes a singular noodle out, dropping it into his mouth to make sure it tastes right. “Now help me plate this so we can bring it to our loves out there.”

Watching Donghyuck and Renjun move together is fascinating. It’s like his sister and her husband, like his parents. They move like a unit, synchronized even if they aren’t really aware of it. Only two years into their relationship and it’s already so natural, like their bodies have always known how to be like this with each other.

In truth, nobody seemed to expect them to get together at first. They had been at each other’s throats, bickering at every possible opportunity. There were always snide remarks about each other everytime their department or their work friends invited them out for a drink. Every time Jeno had to be in a meeting with them, he had to subtly sink down into his chair to avoid the very obvious tension between them. It seemed like they absolutely hated each other’s guts.

Now, though, with their photos in tastefully matching frames (most likely by Renjun), it looks like they’ve been like this forever. Jeno has seen them on multiple occasions before. His favorite may be the one of Hyuck, grinning widely as he comes out of the airport, no doubt seeing Renjun coming up to meet him. That happiness was different from what he usually saw, something most likely reserved for his boyfriend only. It was captured in a way that made any viewer conclude, _Oh, he’s in love._

Since he first saw it, he’s wondered if he’s ever looked at anyone like that. Jeno’s been in love, been in relationships. But he never quite knew if he smiled like that at anyone, if his happiness just so obviously came off of him in waves. He wishes that he knew what being in love looked like on him.

Looking at Donghyuck and Renjun now, easily carrying a conversation with Jaemin, he also wonders at how they just went and found a perfect match in each other. Sure, they still bickered. They didn’t get along with absolutely everything. Hell, he’d even been reeled into choosing the colors for their beddings because the pair had been fighting for over a week about it. But Jeno knows that they’ll still choose each other at the end of the day, still tease each other until they’re both on the floor laughing. And even as he’d rather not be in their vicinity once they’re starting to get really clingy, it’s also admittedly adorable. 

He misses it, he admits to himself. There hasn’t been much time in his life to really think about it, but he knows it’s there. On some days, he finds himself wanting someone to hold him, run their hands through his hair. On other days, he wishes for another presence in his apartment apart from his own, warm and welcoming and easy to snuggle into. Most days, though, he just wants someone who can tell him about their day, and he’d listen to their voice, laugh at their stories, add in his own experiences. Just contact, he guesses, but it sounds too little to really explain what he wants.

Jeno has tried, really, he has. However, things just wouldn’t go the way he hoped they would. That was okay. Some things, and some people, just weren’t for him. It didn’t have to be something that he would lose sleep over. He accepted it, and went on.

But sometimes, especially during times like this, he thinks about it. How would life be different if he was in a relationship? Would he have moved in with them? Would he have argued about the color of beddings with them? How many photos would they have on their walls and on their side tables? Would they invite their friends over for a dinner like this?

Many things could be different, but the more he thinks about it, the more he thinks that many things could just be the same. He would be coming to these dinners with Donghyuck and Renjun. He’d wake up at the same time, use the same soap when he showers. He’d still enjoy the nights after finishing a big project drinking with all his teammates. He’d still be him, the one who binge watches series on his bed and passes out at weird times. Just, maybe, with someone in his life that does all those things with him.

And maybe he doesn’t completely understand what it’s like to be with someone for that long yet, but he thinks it’s not all change. He doesn’t have to go out of his comfort zone if he didn’t want to. They can change together, little by little, but also be a part of each other’s routine. Staying fundamentally the same, but growing together still.

He looks at Jaemin, who’s helping Jisung with his noodles, all while listening attentively to Renjun telling them about a video project gone hilariously wrong. Jeno thinks about how the both of them were hesitant to live together out of the blue because of this whole thing, and yet Jaemin found a way to incorporate him into their lives. They’re still learning, all three of them, that’s for sure, but it doesn’t feel like a big leap into something unknown anymore. It was slowly easing to a new normal, one where they’re all comfortable and happy with how things were.

Jeno finds that he likes it a lot.

And this, whatever this is, no matter how long he’ll actually have it, he’ll enjoy it. He promises this to himself.

♡

Their visit ends pretty late, mostly due to Donghyuck absolutely refusing the fact that they lost Pictionary of all things, when Renjun was an artist and should clearly have the advantage. Jaemin also thinks it’s because the couple had been through far too many glasses of wine, but saying that to their faces only results in them giggling together and pouring out another two glasses.

Jeno had passed out at some point, also due to the sneaky refilling of his own glass. Hyuck definitely had a magic way of charming people to do as he wished, and getting Jeno drunk was almost a piece of cake for him. Luckily, Jeno had stumbled into the master bedroom, where both the tots were fast asleep as well, and Jeno just crashed into the bed with them. Better than Jaemin having to hoist him up from the floor, so he’ll take it.

That leaves Jaemin with two drunk friends whispering undoubtedly flirty stuff to each other, a husband that’s knocked out, and two overtired babies curled around each other. Not the best combo, but it’s not like he can change that.

At a little past 10, he comes close to the couple to tell them that they should be going. Renjun is the more conscious out of the two of them, so he perks up and untangles himself from a complaining Donghyuck to help Jaemin get his kid and Jeno. They stare at the boys that are very much lights out on the queen-sized bed, and they both heave out a sigh.

They settle on Renjun carrying Jisung to the car as Jaemin attempts to get Jeno upright. Jeno is heavier than he anticipated, but at least he goes easily, mumbling something incomprehensible in Jaemin’s ear. By the time he gets Jeno out of the house, Renjun is already half inside the car, fastening Jisung’s seatbelts as best as he could. He’s pretty woozy, Jaemin knows, but he’s trying to be as careful as possible. It’s a relief to see Jisung still fast asleep when he passes by to load Jeno into the passenger seat.

Once Renjun has secured Jisung into the car seat, he offers to help Jaemin. He waves him off, already having most of Jeno into the seat anyways. Renjun still stands there, a little awkwardly, like he’s waiting for them to truly be okay before he goes back inside.

Jeno is awake, refusing to let go of Jaemin’s hand as he tries to buckle him in. Jaemin laughs to himself about it, how he was hesitant the first time they held hands today, and now he’s like this. He manages to get the seatbelt on after some maneuvering, and assures Jeno that he’ll be right beside him in a bit, closing the passenger side door.

Renjun looks at the closed door, and Jeno’s head pressed against the glass of the window. “I might not remember any of this in the morning, but boy, do I want to.”

Jaemin chuckles, putting a hand on Renjun’s shoulder. “Hopefully you don’t.”

Even in the dark, Renjun’s eyes are so bright, like they hold the knowledge of the universe. “You never answered earlier when I asked. Do you like him?”

The only thing Jaemin can offer is a small smile. He doesn’t know how much of any of this Renjun will retain by the next day. “I have yet to give myself an answer for that.”

His friend curls his lip at him. “That’s such a Na Jaemin answer. Go then. Be safe, okay?”

Nodding, Jaemin gets his keys from his friend. “We will be. I’ll text you when we get home.”

Eyes already closed, Renjun makes a dismissive hand gesture. “I might not even see it once you do. Now, go home, I’m gonna go make sure me and Hyuck at least reach the bed.”

Jaemin laughs, saying goodbye. In the driver seat, he can see Renjun disappearing back into his house. He starts up the car, the sound making Jeno grumble just a bit.

The drive home is quiet, and Jaemin doesn’t play anything on the radio. It’s good that his own home isn’t too far away, as he feels the exhaustion tug at him. He’s vaguely aware that Jeno is awake, silently tracing patterns into the window. He hopes that in the morning, Jeno wouldn’t feel terrible, but he’s prepared to make a hangover cure if need be.

He never really thought that he’d be taking care of two people tonight, but he finds that he doesn’t mind.

Reaching home, he asks Jeno if he can get into the house on his own. Jeno nods slowly, unbuckling his seatbelt like in a haze. Jaemin gets out first to get Jisung, unbuckling the belts gently and shifting the sleeping baby into his arms. Jeno comes out of the car shortly after, a little unstable on his feet but otherwise upright.

They do manage to get in after some fumbling with the keys, Jeno stumbling into the house first with Jaemin trailing close behind. Jeno has enough consciousness left in him to go to the bedroom, where Jaemin hears him plop himself onto the bed. He puts down his laptop bag gently on the couch, where he can just get to it in the morning. 

Jisung doesn’t really wake up when he sets him down into his cot, nor when Jaemin makes quick work of changing him out of his outside clothes and into a new diaper and soft pajamas. He only whimpers slightly at the movement, and Jaemin soothes him all the way.

Pressing a soft kiss onto his son’s forehead, he whispers a goodnight. He wishes that they won’t have a tumultuous night again, and that all three of them get plenty of rest.

Turning to Jeno, he sees that he’s blinking at him, as if trying to make sense of his presence. Jaemin kneels at the front of the bed, untying Jeno’s shoes and slipping them off his feet. Once he’s done, he gets up to take off Jeno’s jacket, tossing it over to the armchair in the corner.

“Nana,” Jeno calls out, even as Jaemin is right there, debating if he should get Jeno out of his jeans and shirt too. He already knows where Jeno has placed his sleepwear, and he can try to get Jeno into them after some effort. “Nana,” Jeno tries again.

“Hmmm?” Jaemin hums, fingers ready to start unbuttoning the casual button-up that Jeno has on.

Jeno seems to think for a bit, wondering if he should say his next words. Jaemin waits for him, hands stilling on the fabric. 

“I like you,” Jeno says, so quiet that Jaemin thought he heard wrong.

“What?” he asks, lowering himself to sit on the bed.

“I like you,” Jeno repeats, but his voice is shaky at the edges. “I like you, Nana.”

Jaemin doesn’t quite have an answer to that, so he goes back to work on the buttons. He’s aware of the way that Jeno is looking up at him, waiting as he had waited. It’s almost childlike, his face right now. Like a kid wanting their new favorite person in the world to say that they like them too.

“Really?” Jaemin attempts, voice barely above a whisper. He’s almost sure that Jeno doesn’t hear, but he apparently does.

Nodding, Jeno’s hands come up, as if to hold onto Jaemin, but they drop after a moment’s thought. “Yes. But it hurts.”

This makes Jaemin furrow his brows. He’s done with the shirt, so he tosses it aside as well, standing up to get a shirt from a drawer and pajama pants that are quite similar to one of his own pairs. He comes back to the bed, helps Jeno into the oversized shirt.

“Why would it hurt?” he questions once Jeno’s head is out of the right shirt hole. “Liking someone shouldn’t hurt.”

He says, as if he didn’t hurt when he fell in love with people that always said he was too much. As if he didn’t break his own heart time and again by liking the ones that barely if ever actually cared about him.

Jeno shakes his head, now avoiding his eyes. He fiddles with his fingers in his lap, and Jaemin isn’t sure if he can change him into pajama pants now. “You don’t like me,” he says finally, his lips forming into a pout.

Jaemin feels like laughing, but he only lets out a huff of breath. “You’re so sure.”

There’s a sad little nod from Jeno, and he really does look like a kid right now. “It’s okay. I don’t expect you to.”

It makes Jaemin purse his lips, a sigh leaving him. Gently, he pushes the locks of blonde hair away from Jeno’s face, silently hoping that he’d look up at him. A part of him wants to press a reassuring kiss on his forehead, but Jaemin pushes the idea down.

“You’re so good to me, Nana,” Jeno says, finally tilting his head up so their gazes can meet. The smile on his face is dopey, and it makes his eyes crinkle into the cute crescents that Jaemin always enjoyed seeing. “I want to be happy with you.”

And that threatens to get to Jaemin, break his heart. Maybe he’s too tired from today to really register it, but it’s undeniable how his insides twist at Jeno’s words.

Slowly, he threads the fingers of one hand through the spaces in one of Jeno’s, lifting their hands up. Jeno looks at their joined hands in confusion, not sure what to make out of it. Jaemin stares too, trying to imprint the feeling of the comforting warmth into his mind.

“You can be,” he answers, and this time he’s sure that Jeno doesn’t hear. Jeno is still looking at their hands, both rough and calloused at different parts, fitting in a way that probably neither of them expected. “I want it, too.”

He lets go after a bit, then moving to change Jeno into the pajama pants. Jeno complies, doesn’t say another word. It’s easier, for the both of them.

Jeno is already mostly asleep when Jaemin climbs into bed, also changed into sleepwear. His presence makes Jeno perk up slightly, and he raises an arm as if to welcome Jaemin into bed. It makes Jaemin chuckle softly, and he goes.

Apparently, drunk Jeno is rather cuddly, as he pulls Jaemin in closer. Jaemin thinks he might even be close to whining at him so that they can snuggle into each other. He doesn’t resist, letting him be pressed into Jeno’s warmth, their knees bumping and their chests mere inches away. One of Jeno’s arms is practically curled around his waist, and he’s giggling quietly as he’s held. His own hand comes up to stroke soothing circles into Jeno’s scalp, which makes him drop off into sleep almost immediately.

This close, Jaemin can smell the sweet wine on him, coating his usual scent of clean linen and rain. This close, he can press a tiny smooch on Jeno’s perfect nose. He doesn’t though, only runs his fingers through the soft hair and whispers a very delayed, “Goodnight, Jeno.”

He doesn’t really fall asleep, not right away. Instead, he turns Jeno’s words in his mind over and over, but he’s not sure if he wants to remember them in the morning or forget them for Jeno’s sake. It was probably not something he was supposed to know, and he didn’t want Jeno to be embarrassed about blurting it out while drunk.

Jaemin looks at the sleeping face mere inches from his. He traces the long lashes, the cheekbones, the strong jaw, the soft hair in a disarray with his gaze. Touching him would feel like he’s splintering his heart into pieces again, he knows. So, Jaemin only breathes his air, wishing that things were easier, just this once.

He lets himself fall asleep, finally.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello everyone! are you doing alright? the past weeks have been a lot for many of us. i hope that all of you are doing okay, and are taking care of yourselves! please do take a break if everything is too much ;;
> 
> [here](https://forjusticeforpeace.carrd.co/) and [here](https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/) are links to carrds that have petitions, translations, and other resources for blm, junk terror bill, and others. if you can, do check them out! sign the petitions, donate if you can, spread the word. there's still a lot that we can do right now to help so many lives.
> 
> my [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/evnsangcvlt) is here if you wanna talk about anything, or drop any related resources. i hope you stay safe during this time, i love all of you! ♡


	4. scared

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay i kinda hurt myself writing this chapter ngl
> 
> also, we're halfway through! o.o

**『** **_Another love, another loss is gone_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Another night, another day is done_ ** **_  
_ ** **_I'd be the last one to deny_ ** **_  
_ ** **_That it's so hard to be alone_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Came across a gentle melody_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Love allowed it, so I let it be_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Why'd it take so many seasons_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Now I found a reason to live for_ ** **』**

♡

**DAY 4**

The first time Jeno wakes up, he nearly startles into an upright position. He’s about a breath away from Jaemin’s face, all too close. When he’s calmed down enough to process more about the situation, he also registers the arm around him, a comforting weight if he wasn’t so suddenly tense.

Slowly, gently, he inches away, putting as much distance between them as he possibly can. However, he’s unsuccessful, as Jaemin grumbles in his sleep and pulls him in, very nearly pressing his entire body onto Jeno. Jeno bites back how sharply he inhales, trying not to make even the slightest sound.

This close, it wouldn’t be hard to hear his heartbeat that he’s sure is thundering against his ribs. Jaemin doesn’t seem bothered by it in the slightest, still sleeping soundly. Jeno at least tries to be far enough so that Jaemin doesn’t feel it, about as far as Jaemin’s insistent arm will allow.

He has no idea why they’re in this position in the first place, but it doesn’t seem like they’ve done anything much other than hold each other. Jeno hopes that’s the case.

Now that his heart has calmed down, he registers the pounding in his head. Oh, right, he got drunk last night. Normally, he was better at handling it, but at some point Donghyuck had taken out something that definitely was not wine. He vaguely remembers Jaemin taking away a few glasses from him, either drinking them himself or setting them far away. What he doesn’t remember, though, is at what point he passed out. 

He doesn’t remember how he ended up with Jaemin practically snuggling him, but really, it’s not like he minds. It’s just that if he thinks too much about it, he might risk getting his heart rate back up, and he just can’t wake up Jaemin right now. Up to now, this close of a proximity wasn’t really something they did, especially when sleeping.

But Jaemin is warm and such a solid, comforting presence. He’s gentle, and yet so  _ there _ that Jeno feels like nothing can possibly go wrong with him there. A sliver of moonlight casts silver around him, and if Jaemin is glowing when he’s awake during the day, he looks near ethereal like this, sleeping peacefully while haloed in light. 

Reaching out a hand, Jeno touches the ever-there swoop of hair just above Jaemin’s forehead. He’s real, he’s  _ here _ . A part of Jeno wishes he was dreaming, even as he traces a finger down the side of Jaemin’s face. If this was a dream, he could just brush it off, try to forget about it.

It isn’t, though. Jaemin has an arm around him, his breathing mixing with Jeno’s, and his nose close enough that Jeno can smooch it if he moves even in the slightest. Jeno had told himself the night before that he didn’t want to be worrying about everything, but this, how real this is and how easy it is to reach Jaemin, this hurts.

He doesn’t dare speak out loud, no matter how soft he can make his voice. Jeno doesn’t think he can anyways, his throat and tongue feeling like cotton. He only trails his finger back up, following the waves in Jaemin’s hair.

_ Damn it, _ he thinks.  _ I don’t know if I can do this. _

Shaking his head, he closes his eyes. Maybe, if he opens them, he can be back to staring at the wall, with his back turned to the other man in this bed. Maybe, if he opens them, he can convince himself that he was just imagining things, brought on by his hangover and his barely-awake state.

When he opens them, though, he’s met with the same sleeping face, unmoving, not even aware that Jeno has been playing with his hair. 

_ Why you? Why me? Why, of everyone in the office, Donghyuck and Renjun just so conspired for us to be paired up? _

_ Why, when I can’t even let myself have this? _

Jeno takes back his hand, holding it close to his chest. There, he can feel the slightest thrum of Jaemin’s heartbeat against his fingers. 

_ One can’t lose what isn’t theirs in the first place. I don’t know who said that, but I remember. I need to remember that this isn’t mine to lose. _

The pounding in his head flares up again, and the dull ache at the back of his eyes is more present now. He closes his eyes again, knowing full well he’s gonna feel even more like shit if he doesn’t get more sleep.

So, he wills himself to sleep, pushing down all his thoughts and hoping he somehow forgets in the morning. There are many things he wishes for these days, he notes as he takes deep breaths.

Jeno wants to forget that he wishes Jaemin’s arm stays there until the morning.

The second time he wakes up, a small body is wriggling between them.

“Appa!” Jisung calls out, his knees and elbows digging into everywhere from the bed to their thighs to their sides. “Wake up time!”

Jeno hears a grumble from the other side of the bed, and a soft “oof” as he presumes Jisung climbs over his dad. It still hurts to open his eyes fully, so Jeno only groans, turning over so that he can avoid Jisung’s feet that might just end up in his face.

There are, however, little hands on the covers that he’s pulled up his head, insistently pressing. “Uncle Nono! Wake up time!”

He feels Jisung’s weight be pulled away from him, like Jaemin’s scooping him up into his arms to take him away from the still-mostly-asleep Jeno. 

“Sssshhh, Jisung, Uncle Jeno’s very tired and needs more sleep. Let’s be quiet, okay?” he hears Jaemin tell the tot.

Jeno can’t hear a response, but he can hear their footsteps fading out of the room. When he knows they’re already well out of sight, he pulls down the covers, staring at the ceiling and contemplating if he should get out of bed.

The headache is still there, and if he keeps his eyes open for too long, it feels like he’s just worsening it. He thinks about just melting into Jaemin’s bed, and not getting up on this all-too-sunny Friday morning.

After some time, Jaemin comes back into the room, presumably to check up on him. Jeno has no idea how much time has passed, or if he’s drifted off at some point during that time.

“Hey,” Jaemin whispers, perching at the edge of the bed. Jeno turns to look at him, and even the motion makes his temples throb. “Do you wanna get up today? It’s okay if you don’t.”

Without really meaning to, Jeno pouts at him, trying to wordlessly convey his pain. “Mmm. I need to get up.”

A hand comes to rest on top of the covers, just above Jeno’s stomach. He can’t be sure, but Jaemin almost looks like he wants to reach up and cradle his head.

“You don’t have to,” Jaemin says. His hand feels like it’s burning through the sheets. “One day off won’t kill you, I promise.”

Jeno thinks of the work he was supposed to do today. Just the normal load, he guesses, and can be done even at home. He has exactly one (1) meeting for today, and it’s fine if he doesn’t go as long as he sends over the files. Okay, the offer to stay at home is getting even more tempting.

He closes his eyes again, inhaling deeply. “Okay, okay,” he croaks out.

Fingers rest on his forehead, ever so gently. “Whenever you’re ready to get up, I’ve made some  _ haejangguk _ . Don’t push yourself, okay?”

Right as Jaemin is moving to leave, Jeno catches his wrist, a little weakly. Jaemin looks down at him, eyebrows up.

It takes a few seconds before Jeno finds the words. “Can you...can you help me up? I’m not gonna be able to get up on my own, I think.”

Jaemin’s expression softens immediately, and he shifts to face Jeno. “Okay. I’ll try to be gentle, okay? Tell me if it hurts.”

Any other day, any other time, and Jeno might have snickered at that. He doesn’t think he has it in him to do it right now.

Unsurprisingly, Jaemin is about as gentle as a person can be when hoisting up a hungover person. A hand is under Jeno’s head, while his arm is a strong presence at Jeno’s back. He’s lifted upright, little by little, and Jaemin seems to be cooing to him the whole way. The headache is still there, but he doesn’t even care about it anymore when Jaemin’s holding him like a baby.

Once he’s sitting up, head almost drooping to rest on Jaemin’s shoulder, Jaemin asks, “Okay?”

Humming, Jeno answers. “Okay.”

The hand on him are making soothing rubs, like what Jisung gets. Jeno almost laughs. “Do you think you can stand up?” Jaemin whispers.

Jeno nods, eyes closed. “Thank you,” he murmurs.

“You’re welcome.” Jeno thinks he can hear him smile.

He doesn’t leave though, staying within reach as Jeno slowly gets out of bed. Jaemin remains, even if Jeno seems to be stable on his feet. Jeno makes a mental note to be extra thankful to him today.

Jeno makes it to the dining table in one piece, and a bowl of soup is placed in front of him. He registers Jaemin going to the living room to get Jisung. Within moments, Jisung is strapped into his high chair, a bowl is placed in front of him too.

With some sort of magic that probably only Jaemin has, Jisung isn’t loud or babbling this morning, just quietly enjoying his food. It’s a blessing really, one that he might have to kiss them both for. 

When Jeno’s mostly done with his soup, Jaemin quietly asks, “Would you want me to drive Jisung over to the daycare or are you okay with taking care of him?”

He looks up from his bowl. “Oh. Uh, yeah. I can do that.”

That’s the least he can do, he thinks. Jaemin has been taking care of him and Jisung since last night. Hell, he’s been taking care of the two of them nonstop the entire time. One day babysitting Jisung is nothing compared to what Jaemin has done.

The smile on Jaemin’s face is warmer than the  _ haejangguk _ . “Thank you. There’s food that you can reheat and I’ll write out anything you need to do, okay?”

Jeno nods, offering a smile. The soup has already helped him quite a bit. “Okay. I can do that.”

“Thank you,” Jaemin says again, then turning to Jisung. “Uncle Jeno will take care of you today, okay? You need to behave…”

Jeno doesn’t quite hear the rest of it. He only looks at the father and son duo, who, for some reason, look unbelievably good in the sunlight streaming through the windows. It’s like the sun was made for them, made to illuminate their smiles.

Maybe that image alone cures the rest of his hangover.

♡

When Jeno has disappeared into the bathroom, led by an excited Jisung, Jaemin heaves out a breath. He turns on the camera again, planning to get some more talking in than he had already before breakfast.

“So.” He runs a hand through his hair, tugging at the knots. “Jeno agreed to staying with Jisung today. I wasn’t sure if he was going to be okay with it, and I want him to rest…”

For a moment, he glances towards the bathroom door. He can already hear Jisung splashing around. “But he said yes to it. I’m grateful, really.”

He looks down at the list he’s making. Just basic stuff, like what particular toys Jisung likes best, the shows he watches, the food he eats. Where the diapers and baby powder are. All the phone numbers Jeno might need. Jaemin purses his lips.

“He’s… He’s the first person that I’ll leave Jisung to that is not my brother or the nurses at the daycare.” There’s a tiny smile curling Jaemin’s lips. “And I trust him. Completely.”

Jeno is careful, he knows this. He doesn’t try to step over any line, unless he’s directly prompted. He doesn’t do anything without asking if it’s okay. He’s so scared of hurting either of them that he almost doesn’t make direct contact. But when he does, it’s soft, warm, comforting. 

Plus, he’s willing to learn, be it how to bathe the tot or how to help put him to sleep or how to make food that everyone here would like. He's learning their everyday habits, slowly incorporating himself into them. It’s endearing, and to Jaemin, it matters so much.

He knows Jisung will be just fine with Jeno.

"He'll do great, I just know." Jaemin allows himself to smile. "Some father-son bonding time is well overdue too, don't you think?" 

A chuckle escapes him. He's looking at the bathroom door again. 

"Don't tell them, but I'll miss them both terribly while I'm at work." 

Okay, that's not something he's saying just for the camera. It's always been difficult to be away from his son while he worked, so picking him up from daycare and coming home was something he always was excited for. It didn't matter how tired he was, Jisung always made him feel so much more alive after his long days. 

Now, he'll miss seeing Jeno at work too. Admittedly, they didn't really see each other all that much, on account of them being on different floors and different departments. Still. He'll miss dropping off food at his desk, or wander to their floor on his break just to say hi. He'll miss Jeno's presence in his car, humming to children's songs now, too. 

_ It's just one day,  _ he reminds himself. 

Alright, Jaemin is not going to think about how he'll miss all of that and more by next week. It's too early. 

He turns off the camera, listening to the sounds coming from the bathroom. Jeno must already be rinsing Jisung, judging from the squeals. Jaemin should prepare his son's clothes for the day. 

As he lingers in the kitchen, still listening, he already thinks of hugging them when he comes home. 

Unsurprisingly, Renjun does not look like shit. As far as Jaemin remembers, the producer  _ never _ looks like he's been run over by a truck, even if he's nursing the worst hangover or is down with the flu. A bit unfair, really. 

He strides up to Jaemin's desk, holding out a very familiar denim jacket. "Jeno left this," he tells him, and Jaemin realizes that nothing can mask how terrible Renjun's voice is this morning. 

"Thanks," he says, slinging it over the arm of his swivel chair. "Sorry I didn't text you last night. Basically just crashed when we got home." 

Renjun waves it off. "It's alright. You're in one piece, so I suppose it went fine." 

Jaemin smiles up at him. He's gonna pretend he doesn't smell the Red Bull in the tumbler that Renjun is holding. "How about you? Doing okay?" 

For a moment, Renjun scrunches his face, shoulders slumping just a bit. "Basically impossible to get up this morning, but Chenle was crying about needing to go to the bathroom and I wasn't going to risk him taking a dump on our bed again."

Wincing, Jaemin asks, "Again?" 

A hand comes up to pinch at Renjun's nose bridge, just below where his glasses sit. "Yes.  _ Again _ . We've learned now."

Jaemin gives his best  _ I understand _ nod. Toddlers really were something else. "How's Hyuck?" 

Renjun snickers, taking a sip from his tumbler. Okay, there's definitely something in there other than the Red Bull. "Either asleep at his desk or asleep in a studio. Don't worry, I'll join him later." 

That makes Jaemin laugh. "The both of you are so cute.”

For a moment, it seems like Renjun wants to throw a comment back at him, but reconsiders it. Instead, he asks, “You let Jeno babysit today?”

He nods. “I offered to bring Jisung to the daycare, but he agreed to taking care of him.”

If Renjun is surprised by this, he doesn’t show it. His eyes drift to the frame on Jaemin’s desk. If Jaemin didn’t know him, he’d think that Renjun was trying to look for something to say. That was the thing. Huang Renjun always had something to say, one way or another. This hesitance means he’s thinking against it.

Truthfully, Jaemin didn’t think he wanted to know how much Renjun remembered of last night. At some point, Jeno did become rather clingy, not liking it when Jaemin was beyond arm’s reach. He was used to the feeling of having someone wrap around him and refuse to let go, but not quite with a grown man.

Sometimes, he’d even whispered sweet things to him, just to make him giggle. Drunk Jeno was someone he didn’t quite think he’d be able to witness. He held back less, and Jaemin delighted in the pleased laughs he’d give whenever Jaemin complimented him. In Jaemin’s arms, Jeno smiled up at him like he was his world.

Renjun has always been perceptive, even with the alcohol swilling in his veins. Jaemin wishes he doesn’t remember much, or if he does, he doesn’t bring it up. He can handle the embarrassment, but he’s not sure Jeno can.

“He’ll call in a bit to ask you about the baby talk,” Renjun says after a long moment of thinking, the corner of his mouth quirking up. Jaemin chuckles.

“Oh, I’m counting on it.”

The producer’s eyes fix on him, searching for something that Jaemin can’t place. Renjun looks sad, somehow, and Jaemin hopes that he doesn’t see him look at him like that again.

“I’ll go now,” Renjun says, shaking his tumbler just a bit. “Shouldn’t be holding you up for too long.”

Jaemin nods at this, unsure what he can answer. He watches as Renjun leaves. For the first time in a while, Jaemin wishes that he doesn’t know as much about him as he does.

Halfway through answering an email about a meeting for this afternoon, a head pops out from the cubicle in front of him.

“Mr. Na,” the intern says, and Jaemin doesn’t need to look up to know that he’s got a curious expression on his face. “Is it true that you and Mr. Lee are… you know…”

Rubbing at his eyes, Jaemin asks him, “Are we what, Yangyang?”

“You know.” Yangyang makes it sound like Jaemin’s supposed to know. “Smooching. Banging. Something like that.”

He feels his eyebrows reach his hairline. It’s not even the rumor that shocks him, it’s the fact that he had to hear it from Yangyang of all people, his intern.

The iced coffee he has this morning has some difficulty going down. He shakes his cup, letting the ice hit against the plastic cup. “How much did you bet that we were?”

The question throws the intern off guard, and he’s spluttering. That’s definitely a first. Yangyang knew his words, knew exactly how to use them at the best moments, and that’s why Jaemin took him in in the first place. 

Jaemin expected the bet, of course. He’d even witnessed the betting pools for one of the couples that had participated in the  _ Married for a Week _ series. Not that he participated, not at all, but it was interesting to see how much people believed that the pair would do something beyond civil relations. If people thought that the shipping was bad when the videos came out, they really haven’t seen how the shipping within the office was.

Undoubtedly, that was happening with them too. Jaemin didn’t know the extent that the other pairs went while they were in the office walls, but he can confidently say that they weren’t entirely subtle either. It would have been easy for the info to spread that they were doing the challenge, if not actually dating. News like that travels fast here, especially if people have seen him bringing lunch over to Jeno (and finding excuses to visit him for absolutely no reason other than to see him) and Jeno pulling up empty chairs to sit by Jaemin and massage his hands and sometimes his shoulders in between meetings. Hell, they’ve only started actually holding hands yesterday, but to the people here, that must mean they’re already fucking.

Funny how people make up their own stories from the barest of things. He thinks this is why the series is so popular in the first place, it satisfies the demand for something that  _ suggests _ romance between two strangers, while also leaving enough room for interpretation. Jaemin won’t be surprised if the people in this office have commented on those videos, saying that they absolutely believe that the couple can be more after the video.

He already half expects them to be crowned  _ Couple of the Month _ , taking away the honor that has been Renjun and Donghyuck’s for a while now. Jaemin isn’t sure right now how he feels about it.

“I didn’t –”

Jaemin looks up at him, gentle smile on his face. “It’s okay. It happens. I’ve seen it.” He laughs, trying to ease the tension on the intern’s face. “Change your bet. You’re gonna lose.”

Yangyang once again tries to find something to say, but Jaemin pipes up again. “Tell Renjun to change his, too.”

Quietly, the intern nods, ducking back to his desk. Jaemin lets out a sigh, going back to replying to his emails. There’s some stuff he knows he can finish before his break, and he just wants them over with.

When he’s sent over the last of the first batch of reports, Jaemin leans back in his chair, stretching for a bit. Once he’s rolled out the cricks in his neck, he rummages through a drawer for his sticky notes. Thankfully, there’s a working pen on his desk, so he starts writing out the notes.

He finishes them, reading through each one. Standing up, he brings the notes with him, texting a quick  **Doing alright there? Just wanna check in! ~ヾ(＾∇＾)** before going to Jeno’s floor.

At Jeno’s desk, he carefully starts placing all the sticky notes. He’s vaguely aware that Jeno’s deskmate is eyeing him, but he doesn’t really care. Sticking them on takes him about 5 minutes, and he steps back to admire his work.

It wasn’t much, but he hoped it could help.

He’s about to leave when his phone pings with a notification. The first message he sees is a photo of Jisung, all smiley even as food is smeared all over his mouth and cheeks. Following that is Jeno’s update.

**[** ♡  **HUBBY** ♡  **]** **  
** **He’s eating really well!** **  
** **Gonna try to get him to nap after this** **  
** **I think I’m gonna need the nap more** **  
** **Maybe** **  
** **Have you eaten?**

Jaemin is about to reply when another message comes in, a video. He plays it. In the video, Jisung waves at the camera with his messy, rice covered fingers. Jeno prompts him softly to say “hi appa” as he keeps waving. It switches to the front camera, and Jaemin is met with Jeno’s face, pouting cutely before breaking into a smile.

**[** ♡  **HUBBY** ♡  **]** **  
** **He misses you!**

It’s hard to fight down the grin that spreads across Jaemin’s face.

**[NANANANANA** ♡♡♡ **]** **  
** **I miss you both! (∩˃o˂∩)♡**

He replays the video one more time before he leaves Jeno’s desk.

♡

Wiping the last of the mess from Jisung’s hands and face, they finish lunchtime. Jeno gets the tot out of the high chair, bringing him over to the living room and setting him down on the playmat. He lets Jisung play for a bit while he tidies up, aiming to get him to nap after.

Taking care of a two-year-old didn’t seem like it was easy. He had Googled some articles, as well as watched some YouTube videos on it. Obviously, none of them could accurately give him the whole experience, but they at least gave him an idea.

He was fully expecting a tantrum. Jeno doesn’t know if Jisung is just really an angel, or it’s just not quite the time for the tantrum yet and that will come later. His sister’s little girl did that, and it was jarring the first few times. She’d throw stuff, and the high-pitched wailing would start. Sometimes, he’d be able to handle it. Other times, he’d have to call his sister or his mom for help.

So this relative peace is rather new territory for him. He’s going to try to be prepared for the possibility of one later, when he least expects it.

Now, he realizes Hyuck was right. This baby is probably one of the most talkative he’s encountered. Most of the time, he has no idea what Jisung is saying, so he just keeps trying to offer stuff until it seems like Jisung is pleased. Slowly, he’s picking up on some patterns, like how Jisung refers to certain toys and what he wanted to do. Definitely not easy, but there’s progress. As a project coordinator, Jeno has always liked progress.

Jisung has a story for many of his toys. The story starts with him saying its name before he launches into what sounds like a very detailed account of what he’s imagined for the toy. Jeno does his best to listen. Apparently his toy train had crashed into something at some point (far as Jeno has picked up), and Jisung keeps making “boom” sounds as he reenacts a scene that is very vivid. He’s struggling with the right words, but Jeno understands what he’s trying to say. It took a whole 20 minutes for Jisung to finish that story, before he went back to putting the cut up slices of toy food into the train compartments.

As much as possible, Jeno tried to watch over him more than he worked. He finished little tasks when Jisung was too engrossed in a toy, but didn’t hesitate to come with him whenever Jisung seemed like he wanted a playmate. Which was, well, every 10 minutes or so. 

He doesn’t mind it. Jisung is insistent, and a little difficult to fully comprehend, but watching over him has been enjoyable so far. The baby is full of boundless energy at times, while also having his own world and staying quiet on his own. Jeno knows full well to never trust when a two-year-old is too quiet, so he stays with him fully when he is. He has infectious giggles, and Jeno might never truly know why he giggles at some things, but he goes with it. Jisung is ticklish, and the past two tickle sessions they’ve had ended up with Jeno on the floor, winded from laughing as Jisung tries to kick him away.

Another thing is how Jisung doesn’t even seem to be picky about food. Jeno is by no means a cook, and his cooking can never really compare to Jaemin’s. Which is why he was relieved that Jaemin had a ready stock of food that he can just reheat so that he doesn’t inevitably mess up in the kitchen. He chose a random few Tupperware containers to microwave, crossing his fingers in the hopes that Jisung would eat what he picked out.

Truth is, it doesn’t seem like Jisung cares what food it is, he  _ will  _ put it into his mouth. Jeno had momentarily worried if it was too spicy for him, but Jisung already was two spoonfuls in and didn’t show signs of stopping. 

It’s also fascinating to him how quickly Jisung picks up on things. At some point, he’d looked up at Jeno working away on his laptop, and asked in a tiny voice, “Uncle work?” He had asked a similar question about his father several times, and Jeno always explained as patiently as he could.

“Yes, uncle is working,” he had said, lifting Jisung up and putting him into his lap. It was hard to fully explain what was on the screen, so he just settled for the simplest terms he could muster. “I’m making sure that everything gets finished on time so everyone is happy.”

Jisung had nodded at that, his little fingers grabbing at the screen. Jeno pointed out the colors, repeating them until Jisung attempted to say them too. The baby got bored soon, and he’d climb off of Jeno’s lap to go back to his toys. He’d come back a few minutes later, though, holding out a plushie or a his toy instruments, and although Jeno knows that he just wants to play, a part of him thinks that Jisung is doing it so he can cheer up a little.

Further evidence of this is, when he finishes washing up, he comes to sit by Jisung, momentarily staring off into space. He was thinking about nothing in particular, up until the tot came up to him, offering him his favorite Mickey Mouse plushie.

“Oh,” he says, shaking his head to clear it. “Thank you, Jisung-ah.”

The baby tilts his head to the side. “Uncle sad?”

“Oh, no! No, no, I’m not.” He tries a smile to convince him that he’s not sad. Jeno isn’t sure if he looked sad, or why would Jisung even think that he was.

Jisung pouts at him. “Appa come home.” He’s nodding, like he’s trying to convince Jeno of something. “Uncle happy?”

It takes a moment before Jeno gets what he’s saying, and he quickly shuts his open mouth. Oh god, the kid thinks –

“It’s not –” He stops in the middle of what he’s saying, a laugh bubbling out of him. “Jisung, that’s not –”

Where did he even get that?

The baby is still looking at him, eyes wide and confused. He’s waiting for Jeno to complete his explanation. Jeno rubs a hand over his face.

“Uncle is not sad, I promise.” A hand comes up to ruffle Jisung’s dark hair. “I’m okay. See? Uncle is happy.” He smiles, more genuine now, and Jisung nods in the slightest.

Within moments, he’s back to playing, like nothing happened. Like he hadn’t just suggested that Jeno would be happy once Jaemin comes home.

Okay, not completely untrue, but the kid does  _ not _ need to know that.

Jeno finds that the most challenging part of his day so far is getting Jisung to nap. All he’s seen the past few days is a very tired Jisung just falling asleep after a story and some rocking back and forth. He had no idea that afternoon naps were nothing like that.

First, he has to chase Jisung around for some time, which really tired him more than it tired the tot out. Jeno thinks it’s too early to be feeling this winded, at the tender age of 23. Once he’s caught him though, he realizes that’s just the beginning.

Jisung absolutely struggles against the idea of sleep, crying about wanting to play more and just staying awake. Based on Jaemin’s notes, that means he’s already overtired at this point, and is just fighting the rest. He at least manages to not drop Jisung no matter how much he’s trying to squirm away, so that’s something.

After some insistent, but gentle, rocking, trying to mimic Jaemin as much as he can, Jisung settles down. His head is on Jeno’s shoulder, and he goes quiet. Jeno takes this time to prepare some warm milk, something Jaemin suggested he do. He keeps swaying from side to side as he does, not wanting Jisung to be disturbed from the lull he was already in.

He isn’t quite sure how to set him down in the crib yet, so Jeno puts down the little sippy cup of milk on the bedside table and uses his free hand to arrange the pillows. Trying to transfer Jisung to the bed, the baby moves, whimpering. It doesn’t seem like he wants to be let go, so Jeno takes in a deep breath and sits down on the bed slowly. He scoots up, resting his back against the pillows so he’s leaning back a bit, and Jisung is against his chest. Shifting him to a more comfortable position is a little difficult, but Jeno manages through gritted teeth.

Jisung easily takes the cup of warm milk, tiny hands latching onto the handles. His blinks are slow now as he gulps down the milk, and Jeno watches him get drowsier by the minute. With a few gentle head rubs and some pats to the side, Jisung nods off, cup dropping from his hands.

Jeno takes the cup away, setting it down on his side table. After making sure that Jisung really was asleep, he started to carefully transfer him to the bed. Jisung sniffles at the movement, but doesn’t wake up otherwise. Jeno holds in his sigh of relief until Jisung is on the bed, tucking a pillow under the small head and drawing the covers up. He goes out to retrieve the favorite plushie, setting it beside the tot’s sleeping form.

Deciding to work in the bedroom so he can watch over him, Jeno takes his laptop and phone over to the bed. He opens his laptop, waiting for the open file to load as he checks his messages. There’s a new one from Jaemin, sent a few minutes ago. 

**[NANANANANA** ♡♡♡ **]** **  
** **Is he asleep yet?** **  
** **I hope it wasn’t too difficult to get him to sleep (｡ŏ﹏ŏ)**

Jeno snaps a photo of the sleeping tot and presses send. He follows it with a message.

**[** ♡  **HUBBY** ♡  **]** **  
** **Just got him to sleep!** **  
** **It’s… harder than I thought hhhhh** **  
** **But it’s fine!** **  
** **His exhaustion caught up to him I guess lol**

**[NANANANANA** ♡♡♡ **]** **  
** **Good to know! (＾▽＾)** **  
** **Btw, might do a little overtime today** **  
** **Just need to finish something** **  
** **But I miss you both so I’ll make sure to come home really soon! ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚**

Reading it, Jeno is struck with an idea. He types out his reply.

**[** ♡  **HUBBY** ♡  **]** **  
** **Okay, see u later!** ♡

Putting his phone down, he gently strokes a finger across Jisung’s forehead.

“Jisung-ah,” he whispers. “We’ll do a surprise later, okay? I’m gonna need your help.”

♡

Yangyang is almost hesitant to leave him. He hovers over Jaemin, asking if he needs any help with anything, but Jaemin waves him away. “It’s alright, I can finish it.”

The intern looks at the clock on the wall opposite. “If you’re sure…”

Jaemin nods, giving the best smile he can muster. “I’m sure. Now, go home, enjoy your weekend. I’ll see you on Monday.”

He can still feel him linger around, but at some point, he does give in and leaves. There’s only a handful left at the office, Jaemin included, and it’s about as quiet as it can get.

Usually, he wouldn’t do overtime on Fridays, or at all really, if he can help it. Jisung would often wonder where he was, and would be cranky by the time they got home. It just wasn’t ideal. But today is an exception, so he tries to make the most of it.

There are truly just a few more things he has to finish before clocking out, mostly paperwork that he would rather finish today than think about on Monday. He can be done in an hour, two hours max, so it really isn’t a big deal.

The updates from Jeno were comforting. Jeno liked sending photos and videos, and Jaemin had to stop himself from looking at them for the 5th consecutive time in a span of a few minutes. It was just so cute, how they played together, ate together, did everything together. At one point, Jeno had also lay down the still-sleeping baby, faking that he was asleep as well. Jaemin loved all the photos he was receiving.

By the looks of it, Jeno was doing extremely well. He wouldn’t be surprised if Jisung preferred him over Jaemin again. He’d act like he was hurt by it, but in reality, it was nice to see his son warm up to him.

Okay, just a few more things, and he can come back to them. His family. Jaemin didn’t think he’d have that thought.

It had always just been him and Jisung, their little family of two. Welcoming someone else into the equation wasn’t something he thought about often. But now, with Jeno, he kept thinking about it. Even when he tried pushing it down. Even when his mind wants to tell him that he should stop.

He focuses on his work. It’s easier to distract himself this way. Now just wasn’t the time to be reflecting on stuff like that.

Jaemin is halfway done when he receives a text. Opening it, he sees that it’s a photo of Jisung’s face, really close up. It looks like Jisung is holding Jeno’s phone himself. Jaemin isn’t able to reply when another photo comes in, a blurry closeup of Jisung’s eyes. Oh, he’s definitely got the phone.

**_Hi Jisung,_ ** he texts, knowing that Jisung can at least recognize his own name. He’s tempted to just call, but he might never finish his work if he does.

So, he puts his phone face down and wills himself to go back to what he was doing. He can do this. It won’t be long until he can see his son again. 

Distantly, he registers his phone pinging, but he tries his best not to check it. If it was urgent, Jeno would call, he knew. He just needed to finish these last few piles and he’ll be on his way.

On his last pile, the elevator dings. Instinctively, Jaemin looks up at who could possibly be coming to the floor at this hour. Most people went home already, if not to the bar for some Friday night drinks. He’s sure that Renjun would have been long gone.

From the elevator emerges a very familiar figure. Jaemin almost stands up, his mouth already open.

Jeno is walking towards him, carrying Jisung with one arm and what looks like a picnic basket in the other. Momentarily, he thinks of his mother leaving that basket at his house, and he never really got the chance to return it. The moment passes, though, and he’s again trying to make sense of Jeno and Jisung’s presence here.

“H-hi,” he gets out, taking them in. Jisung is set down, and he’s running up to Jaemin, hugging his legs and trying to clamber up. “What are you doing here?”

For a bit, Jeno only stares at him, or rather, stares at what he’s wearing. Jaemin is wondering if he has been wearing his shirt inside out this whole time when he remembers that he’s now wearing Jeno’s denim jacket, a little oversized on his frame.

“Oh. Uh.” Jaemin doesn’t have much of an explanation, and uses the excuse of Jisung climbing into his lap to stall for time. “Renjun gave it to me, said you had left it at their house. Plus I got cold so…”

Jeno’s face breaks into a smile, kind and warm. “It’s alright. I  _ did  _ say you can hoard my jackets during the vows. I really don’t mind.”

Jaemin deflates. “Thank you.” He hugs Jisung to him. “Why are you here? I was just about to finish.”

The picnic basket is dangled in front of him. “Decided we can have a little picnic in the park tonight. Just for a change of scenery. Well, that, and Jisung really wanted to see you.”

Turning to his son, Jaemin says, “Is that true, Jisung-ah? Did you want to see appa?”

Jisung nods excitedly, hand coming up to touch Jaemin’s cheek. Jaemin catches the hand in his mouth, pressing his lips over the tiny fingers. “Was it just him that wanted to see me?”

He delights in the way that Jeno’s eyebrows shoot up into his hairline. “Well…”

Chuckling, Jaemin flashes him a bright smile. The thought that Jeno wanted to see him too makes his heart beat against his ribs. “I’m glad you’re here. Really. Just let me finish this one thing, and we’ll get going, yeah?”

The baby nods again, hopping off Jaemin’s lap. Jeno moves to catch him, setting him down onto the floor. “We’ll wait.”

The pair either wander to the break room so that Jisung won’t disturb Jaemin, or they’re in the empty chairs of the people whose desks are close to his. Whenever they’re close, Jaemin can hear Jisung making sounds only he can understand, most likely to accompany whatever toy Jeno brought for him. It makes him smile, and gets him to finish the paperwork faster.

By the time he’s done, Jeno is half asleep in the swivel chair, Jisung held closely to him as the tot soars a wooden airplane toy in the air. Jaemin presses a kiss to his son’s hair.

“Honey?” he tries, and the name is unfamiliar but he likes how it sounds. “We can go now, honey.”

Jeno blinks at him slowly, most likely to rid himself of the sleepy daze he was in. He seems to just now process Jaemin’s words. “Honey?”

Jaemin grins at him. “Yes, I’m calling you that, right?”

Scrunching up his face, Jeno says, “Right. Right.” He looks like he wants to convince himself that it’s happening.

He slowly lowers Jisung, letting him go to his father’s side. Stretching a bit, he then grabs the picnic basket, ready to go out. He still looks a bit sleepy, and Jaemin holds back from poking him in the cheek.

They leave the office, hand in hand even if no one can see, and Jaemin thinks his smile doesn’t disappear from his face the entire time.

Despite Jeno being nervous about the whole thing, the picnic dinner is one of the best things Jaemin has experienced. At the park, Jeno lays out a blanket big enough for them to fit on comfortably. Jisung immediately lies down on his stomach on the patterned fabric, too caught up in his own little world of toy planes and horses to notice much else.

Jeno has prepared sandwiches, ham and cheese ones and ones with fruit and cream. He’s also ordered some other food because he apparently wasn’t sure that what he made was enough and he wanted them to have variety. Jaemin assures him that everything is more than enough, and even in the dim light, he sees Jeno’s ears take on a shade of pink.

He even brought Jaemin’s film camera, saying that he thought that Jaemin would want to take photos. It makes Jaemin look up to the stars, breathing deeply. Jaemin didn’t even remember to bring that camera usually, but Jeno did, for him. There might be tears in his eyes, but Jeno doesn’t notice.

They take turns cradling Jisung and feeding him bites of the sandwiches or spoonfuls of cut noodles. Jisung really hasn’t been at this park at night, so he marvels at all the pretty lights that shimmer on the river like stars and all the people staying to feel the cool spring breeze. The life here at night is different, yet familiar at the same time, and Jisung points out so many different things. Jaemin answers most of his questioning gazes, but Jeno explains too.

Jeno has many stories about their day together. Jaemin listens attentively to his every word, laughing at the story of how Jisung ran away from him while he was trying to dress him for today and how the tot ate almost all the fruit and cheese before Jeno could finish the sandwiches. There’s an animated look on Jeno’s face as he talks, bright no matter how the orangey light in this park barely illuminates much. Jisung interjects with some words of his own, obviously also excited about what they did today.

And this, this is so different from any Friday nights Jaemin has had in a while. Ever since Jisung, all he’s done on weekends are watch movies with him and maybe buy some fried chicken for them to eat. Now, with the scent of flowers and grass enveloping them, the relatively simple food that all of them enjoy, and every giggle from Jisung that he wishes he can capture forever, Jaemin wishes it was always like this. 

If he were to be honest, he’d be passed out on the bed by now from the exhaustion. But this, he knows he can’t miss out on a single moment. He takes as many photos as he possibly can, and some videos of Jeno tickling Jisung until the baby is squirming around on the blanket. None of this can possibly be enough to encapture just how much happiness is in these moments. His heart swells so much that it’s almost painful, that it almost pushes tears out of his eyes.

Jaemin doesn’t want to be scared of consequences. Life has a funny way of getting back at him when it knows he’s been happy for too long. He doesn’t want to know what’s in exchange for this, for what he has right now. The fact that this is their 4th day already, with only 3 more to go, is enough to make it feel like life is starting to get back at him already. It will take from him, as it always has.

So he revels in the rest of the night, with the twinkle in Jeno’s eyes that never seems to die out and the sound of their laughter ringing around every corner of this park. Because if this is going to be taken away from him, he’ll cherish every last millisecond he can still have.

Later, when Jeno offers to drive them home and Jaemin looks at his face illuminated by the building lights, Jaemin thinks back to Renjun’s question, one that he didn’t have an answer to at that time, only yesterday but feeling like months ago.

_ Do you like him? _

Jaemin thinks of the denim jacket still on him, smelling of rain and spring and Jeno’s soap. He thinks of the man beside him, looking over at him every now and then to check if he’s alright. He thinks of the hand that holds onto his without question.

He has an answer. 

♡

Jaemin is sitting on the bed, back to the headrest, eyes on the cot where Jisung is already fast asleep. Jeno has just changed into a shirt big enough for two people to fit into, and his pajamas. He climbs into bed quietly, settling beside Jaemin and following his gaze.

“Really long day, for all of us,” he says, and he watches as Jaemin nods. 

“It’s our fourth.” The way Jaemin says it is so quiet, almost breathless. Jeno sees him take in a deep breath.

Oh. Yeah. It is their fourth day. After 3 more days, they will end the challenge, and get “officially” separated. Jeno frowns at the thought.

“I guess the days went by faster than we thought, huh?” He huffs out a laugh at this, and Jaemin does the same. “The week will really end soon.”

There’s another nod from Jaemin, slower. “It will.”

Jeno looks down at his own hands, clasped in his lap. The ring on his finger shines in the moonlight. “And I’ll… I’ll be moving out.”

Jaemin is quiet for a moment, before humming. He still hasn’t turned to face Jeno. “Yes.”

Biting on the inside of his cheek, Jeno unravels his hands and uses them to squeeze at his own knees. “Do you think it’ll be scary?”

He doesn’t know exactly what he’s referring to. It may be the fact that this will end and they’ll go back to their lives before the whole thing. It may be the way that he knows there’s something else there, something they might not entirely want to admit to each other or themselves yet. It may be the way that they have no idea what will happen by the end.

At this, Jaemin finally faces him. His eyes are so dark, so wide, so full of things that Jeno can’t comprehend. His mouth is open just a bit, and Jeno knows he doesn’t have a reply right away.

“That’s… that’s what you asked before all this started,” he remarks. It’s not an answer to the question.

He nods. “Yeah, I know.”

For a few breaths, Jaemin only looks at him, mouth closing. If Jeno could guess, he’s biting down on his tongue.

Then, his gaze flickers downward, eyelids almost closing. This close, Jeno can probably count each impossibly long eyelash. 

“I’m terrified,” Jaemin admits. He shakes his head, and a bitter, incredulous smile is on his lips. “I’m so scared, Jeno.”

Wordlessly, Jeno aligns their hands, palm to palm, all their fingers to the other’s. They both stare at it, even after Jeno has slotted his fingers through the gaps between Jaemin’s.

“I am too.”

He feels like that’s all he’s been. Scared of something that he doesn’t have. Scared of ruining it somehow. Scared of what will happen before they reach the end of the week. Scared of whatever he’s feeling. Scared of the end, and what it will mean for the both of them.

But he never thought that Jaemin would be scared too. It’s comforting almost, that they’re both unsure of so many things, that they’re both wary of everything to the point that they’re holding back.

And that’s what’s terrible about this: the holding back. What would’ve happened if they didn’t? How much would they actually say to each other when they actually let themselves talk for once?

Jaemin’s hand is now a familiar feeling in his. It doesn’t quite fit, not yet, but he likes it there. Warm and solid and gentle all at the same time, like Jaemin is. The ring on Jaemin’s hand is cold against his skin, a gentle reminder. When he holds Jaemin’s hand, he feels like he’d willingly be led to wherever.

Letting out a shaky laugh, Jaemin asks, “Why are we scared like this?”

Although Jeno has the answer, he doesn’t say it. Admitting out loud why they were like this was a hurdle they both were yet to jump over. He doesn’t know when they would be ready for it, if  _ he _ himself would be ready for it. So he only squeezes Jaemin’s hand, shaking his head softly. Jaemin knows. He seems to know everything.

After a while of silence, they settle down into bed, facing each other. They’re both exhausted, Jeno can tell, but it seems like neither of them want to go to sleep yet.

Unlacing his fingers from Jeno, Jaemin uses them to trace barely-there circles onto Jeno’s shoulder. “Do you think the first love is special?”

He doesn’t expect that question. For a few moments, he only looks straight at Jaemin, whose eyes are trailed to the motions he’s doing on his shoulder. Jeno breathes in. “They always say it is, so I do believe that it’s special, yeah.”

Jaemin hums, his fingers now trailing down the arm. “I don’t even remember mine, so I don’t think it was special.”

That makes a corner of Jeno’s mouth quirk up. “Really?”

“Yeah.” Jaemin’s lips twist into a smile. “There’s something about firsts, yeah, but I think it’s the ones after them that matter even more.”

“Why’s that?”

“Well,” Jaemin seems to contemplate it. He lets out a breath, and Jeno is close enough to feel it. “The first of anything always seems exciting, right? First apartment, first car, first friend, first love, first boyfriend. More often than not, though, those firsts don’t last. They may not even be the best thing for you, so why stop at the first? If a baby stops at his first steps, would that be any good? It’s the steps he takes after that matter, because they make him stronger. They make him able to do it on his own.”

And that, that makes more sense to Jeno than what anyone else has ever told him. He also believed that firsts were just sentimental, but stopping at a first wasn’t good for anyone. It was never quite right the first time, so every succeeding try until it was right was definitely more important.

Jeno can barely stop his own hand from coming to rest at Jaemin’s side. He makes an up and down motion, similar to what he’s learned to do to soothe Jisung. It seems like the effect on Jaemin is similar.

“So I don’t really remember all the firsts. People always say that your first love stays with you, and that they have a corner in the recesses of your mind forever. I just… don’t see why that always has to be the case.”

Pursing his lips, Jeno asks gently, “Why are you telling me this?”

Jaemin looks up at him then, his eyes still searching. A wistful smile is on his face. “All of this is a first for me.” The hand on Jeno’s arm trails down, holding his hand once more. Jaemin holds it up, looking at their intertwined fingers. “I’ll reserve a whole room in my memories for all of this.”

And that, the thought that Jaemin would go ahead and remember him when he doesn’t even remember all the other firsts, it makes Jeno want to cry. He promised himself that he would be happy for the rest of the week, and no doubt that he is, but it’s a knife waiting to be pressed into his heart.

He tries to see if he can remember his first love. It was so long ago that he barely recalls any details. All he does remember is the pain that settled deep into his bones when that boy he met in his Science class moved away. Jeno didn’t quite understand it then, how much that boy meant to him, and he didn’t understand why it hurt to see his empty chair at the front of the classroom.

People didn’t usually end up with their first loves, he knew. And it was for the best, he knew. In the firsts, there were always some sort of hurt.

And Jaemin, Jaemin is the first for so many things. The first office crush he’s had. The first one he’s lived with since after he graduated and moved out. The first one who’s held his hands now that he knows how much that matters. The first who’s done all those things for him, and expecting nothing in return. The first to make him feel like he  _ would _ want to spend all his seconds with him.

When Jaemin asks him, ever so softly, “Can I kiss you?”, Jeno thinks he might be dreaming. Everything feels like a dream, something he has to wake up from. But Jaemin is right here, warm and present and asking if he could kiss Jeno. It’s real.

He says yes. Jaemin’s hand stays in his as he leans in, and their noses brush. Jeno is prepared for the kiss to break his heart.

But Jaemin gently slots his lips against his, tasting of that cherry soda they had and all the moonlight that comes into this room at night, and Jeno thinks he might believe in the magic of firsts, for this one thing. It’s awkward with their angle, but a slight adjustment makes it all the better, and he knows that they melt into each other. Truth is, it’s barely there, and yet it makes everything in Jeno want to sing.

They break apart and it still doesn’t hurt. All he feels is his heart beating against his ribs, obviously wanting to be one with Jaemin’s, which he can hear faintly. Jaemin takes their joined hands and kisses their knuckles, his eyes closed. Jeno wants that mouth on his again, but he doesn’t want to push it. Instead, he leans up, pressing his lips against Jaemin’s forehead. He hears his breath hitch, and the squeeze on his hand tightens in the slightest.

“Goodnight, Nana.” He looks at him, at those dark eyes. He can have this, for now, and he won’t let it hurt. “We should sleep.”

Jaemin quietly considers this, right before leaning up to press another quick, soft kiss at the corner of Jeno’s mouth. “Goodnight, honey.”

Jeno must have made a face at this, because Jaemin starts to laugh. He kisses him again, effectively wiping off whatever expression Jeno made. “Jeno. Goodnight, Jeno.”

And they don’t hold each other, not really, but their hands stay intertwined and their foreheads are pressed together as they finally drift off into sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> your thoughts on this chapter are very much appreciated! ♡
> 
> here is my [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/evnsangcvlt) and [twt](https://twitter.com/evnsangcvlt) if you wanna talk!


	5. family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah, this update is long overdue ;;;;;  
> pretty emotional chapter coming up, i hope you enjoy! ♡

**『** ** _I'm short of breath_** ** _  
_** ** _Standing next to you_** ** _  
_** ** _I'm out of my depth_** ** _  
_** ** _At this altitude_** ** _  
_** ** _Like the world makes sense_** ** _  
_** ** _From your window seat_** ** _  
_** ** _You are beautiful_** ** _  
_** ** _Like I've never seen_** **』**

♡

**DAY 5**

The first order of today, apparently, is putting temporary tattoos onto a very excited Jisung.

Jaemin had bought two sheets with different designs, wanting his son to be able to choose. One sheet has glitters on the tattoos, while the others are just brightly colored ones devoid of sparkle. Jisung plops down on the carpet, the two sheets on the floor for him to pick out which ones he wants.

The first one he chooses is a vanilla ice cream cone. As Jeno cuts it out for him, he asks where he wants to put it.

Pursing his lips, Jisung ponders over it. His eyes dart to Jeno, and he promptly stands up, pointing at an exposed arm where some of the dark swirls on Jeno's skin are. 

"You want it on your arm?" Jeno asks, placing the cut-out of the design on Jisung's arm. The tot nods, eyes widening almost comically. 

Jaemin has a small basin with water and a little soap, and he dips a washcloth into it. He gently rubs at the spot on Jisung's arm where they're going to put the tattoo. Afterwards, he uses rubbing alcohol on the spot too, just to be sure that the skin is clean. Jeno gently aligns the tattoo on the baby's arm, taking the damp sponge that Jaemin hands him to press over it. 

They have to wait a bit for it to fully be transferred to the skin, and Jaemin and Jeno try their best to keep Jisung still during this time. When Jeno finally peels off the paper backing carefully, the light in Jisung's eyes becomes impossibly brighter. A hand mirror is held up by Jaemin, so Jisung can see the ice cream cone on his arm in all its glory.

Starting to bounce up and down, Jisung chants “More! More! More!” Jaemin pulls him into his lap, holding out the sheets in front of him so he can choose again. Within seconds, Jisung points at another one, clambering off of Jaemin to show Jeno. 

It’s a green T-rex, and Jeno can barely see it from how much Jisung is moving around. Casting a look at Jaemin, he holds out his hand, waiting for Jisung to give the sheet to him so he can cut it out. Jisung calms after a bit, his feet halting in their excited stomping as he hands over the sheet. Jeno smiles at him, telling him a bright “thank you, Jisung!” before taking the scissors beside him and starting to cut the little dinosaur out.

The tot points out a spot on his calf, almost by the ankle, to place the T-rex on. He plops down again on the carpet, and Jeno rolls up his pajama leg so he can try placing the tattoo on the calf until Jisung seems satisfied with the placement. Jaemin dutifully cleans that spot as well, and Jeno gently applies the tattoo onto the skin.

By the third tattoo, Jisung has his back turned, so it can go between his shoulders. He chose a glittery, rainbow-colored heart, saying again and again that it was pretty. Jeno has a feeling that they’ll go through a whole sheet at this rate, but no one seems to mind.

He cleans the area himself, as Jaemin is now behind him, chin hooked over his shoulder to look at what he’s doing. Jisung squirms from the cold washcloth and the alcohol on his skin, and Jeno gets a few tickles in before he places the tattoo on. When he peels off the paper, he finds that he wants a heart like that on him too.

Jeno praises the tot for being so behaved, booping his cheek to make him giggle. He hands over the tattoo sheets again, telling Jisung about all the objects and animals he can’t quite name. The baby tries to repeat how he says the words, and each close-enough attempt earns him another appreciative boop or a kiss from Jaemin, every now and then.

They lose count at some point, with both arms and legs sporting quite a few. There’s even a pink daisy above Jisung’s belly button, and he had giggled the entire time it was being transferred to his skin. While Jeno worked, Jaemin practically draped himself over his back, hands idly tracing the lines on his skin.

When he thinks Jaemin has dozed off, his forehead between Jeno’s shoulder blades, he hears a very soft, “Will you let me know what these mean?”

He feels the slightest of touches on his back, going over the shapes there through his shirt. “I will. Someday.”

Jaemin nods, saying an “okay”. Jeno is trying to talk Jisung out of tattooing his forehead with a red car tattoo, which really, he didn’t think he’d ever have to do, but hey, fatherhood is full of surprises. 

At this, though, Jisung is clearly not pleased. He storms off, plopping himself down on the kitchen floor. Jeno tries to call out to him, but it seems that the tot only huffs and turns around, back facing him. 

His dad notices, so he stands up and goes to him. Jeno is left in the living room, wondering if he went a little too far with his refusal to give him the car tattoo. He watches as Jaemin sits down on the floor as well, facing his son, saying something to him.

Okay, Jeno is not an expert at all with this sort of thing, but he really hasn’t seen a parent handle a child going through a tantrum (or at least is about to) like Jaemin. He’s the picture of calm, looking at his son in his eyes and talking to him without raising his voice. By the looks of it, he’s asking questions, and the baby is responding every now and then with a nod or a shake of his head. Jaemin doesn’t touch him, doesn’t force any answers out of him, and to Jeno this is all new.

He doesn’t know how long they stay like that, just father and son talking, with Jaemin trying to calm Jisung down while being reasonable and gentle. Jeno is only a spectator, fiddling with the carpet underneath him until he sees the both of them stand up.

One of Jisung’s tiny hands is in Jaemin’s now, while the other one is in his mouth. They walk over to the living room, where Jeno has stayed. There are remnants of angry tears on his lashes, Jeno notices as the tot sits down. With a clean hand, he wipes them away.

“Are you okay now, Jisung?” he asks gently, not wanting to aggravate the child even more. He gets a tiny nod in response, but Jisung is pouting ever so slightly.

An idea comes to him, and he hopes that it just might cheer up the baby. He can feel Jaemin’s eyes on him as he takes the small hands into his own, holding them carefully.

“Jisung,” he says, trying to call his attention. “Do you want to choose a tattoo for me?”

The baby’s head snaps up to look at him, light filling his eyes again. “Sungie choose?”

Jeno nods, offering a small smile. “Yes, Jisungie will choose for me.”

“Choose! Choose!” Jisung is jumping around again, clearly excited. It makes Jeno grin, and he knows Jaemin is smiling too.

He hands the remainder of the sheets to Jisung, who nearly topples down in his haste to sit down. The baby manages to balance himself, his eyes glued to the shapes and objects.

There’s a hand on Jeno’s back, making a soft up and down motion. “He’s really enjoying this,” Jaemin says.

“Yeah.” Jeno feels his heart swell with happiness. “I’m glad he is.”

“What do you think he’ll choose?” An arm wraps around his waist loosely, holding him but not pulling him too much. Still, he can feel Jaemin’s warmth against him, now becoming a comforting presence. 

Jeno hums, thinking about the designs that were still on the sheets. “Maybe he’ll have me tattoo my own forehead with the red car instead.”

It makes Jaemin chuckle. “I’d love to see you go to work with that.”

Scrunching his face at the idea, he turns his full attention back to the tot. “Have you picked, Jisung?”

Standing up on unsteady feet, Jisung bounds over to him. He’s left behind one of the sheets, holding up the one with all the glitters. Nodding excitedly, he waves the sheet up and down. 

“Heart,” he says.

“You want me to have a heart like yours?” Jeno asks, taking the sheet from him. There are still quite a few hearts on it, so he turns it over to face Jisung. “Point out which heart, Jisungie.”

After a moment of thought where Jisung bites down on his own finger, he uses that drool-covered finger to point at the one he wants. It’s a rainbow one, a smaller version of the one Jisung has. He then points to another beside it, identical. “Appa too.”

Jeno feels a thumb rub across his side. “Oh, you want appa to have a tattoo too?” Jaemin asks, chin again hooked on Jeno’s shoulder. “You want us to match?”

“Mmhmm.” Jisung nods. “Appa match with Sungie!”

Carefully, Jeno cuts out the two small hearts. He and Jaemin decide to put it on the insides of their wrists, so Jisung (and themselves) can see it easily. 

Jaemin shifts position so that he’s beside him, working to clean his skin for the tattoo. They place the heart on Jeno’s right wrist, Jisung doing the spongeing over it. 

For Jaemin, it’s on his left wrist, aligning with Jeno’s. It’s cute, the colors against their skin and the glitter shimmering in the light. They can cover them up easily if needed, but Jeno doesn’t think either of them want to do that.

They take photos, and then Jaemin shows off the tattoos on all of them to the video camera. Jisung is happy to show all of them, especially the ones in the odd places like above his belly button and on his neck. Jeno and Jaemin tilt their wrists a bit, letting the light catch on the glitters.

Later, Jeno carries the tot into the kitchen to watch as Jaemin prepares them lunch. Jisung would be allowed to sit on the countertop and observe Jaemin cutting up vegetables, or he’d be carried over by the stove so that he can peek into the pot. His little grabby hands get a hold of a carrot slice, stuffing it into his mouth while he giggles at being caught. Every now and then, Jaemin would place a smooch on one of his cheeks to appease him, and would do the same for Jeno too. It’s a bright, warm day, and Jeno feels as if sunlight is spreading through him.

And when grubby little hands come to rest on his cheeks during mealtime and Jisung’s laugh rings throughout the house at seeing him look appalled, Jeno knows he wouldn’t have any other home.

♡

“I want to dye my hair,” Jaemin tells him once they’ve cleared all the plates and Jisung has settled into his nap.

Jeno’s eyebrows shoot up. “Oh, uh, sure. Any color you had in mind? Maybe I can pop out for a minute to get the supplies.”

Jaemin roots through a drawer, pulling out a plastic bag. “I already got the supplies,” he says, not answering the question. “Can you help me?”

“Sure.” Jeno has him sit on the carpet. He looks through what Jaemin has bought. “Wow, you’re prepared.”

Making a gesture with his hand to say  _ it’s nothing _ , Jaemin tells him, “I wanted to do it for some time now, and seeing your hair kinda pushed me to do it even more. Bought them during a break, after some research.”

Humming, Jeno sets down everything on the floor. “Not really an expert on this, okay? I’ve really just done it to myself.”

Jaemin takes one of his hands, squeezing reassuringly. He smiles up at him. “I trust you. Worst case scenario I have to cut it off.”

Eyes widening, Jeno nearly gapes at him. “I–I hope it doesn’t come to that.” Jaemin hears him putting the latex gloves on.

The fingertips running over his scalp makes Jaemin want to purr. Jeno is always so gentle.

Those same fingertips spread petroleum jelly all over his ears, nape, and by the hairline, making sure they’re coated nicely. He can feel his hair being sectioned and clipped away, and he scrunches his nose from the weight on his head.

Unsurprisingly, Jeno works quickly and efficiently, his hands careful all the way. Jaemin hasn’t had his hair dyed at a salon in so long, but he vaguely recalls it feeling like this. It’s nicer though, without the awkward small talk with the people at the salon, and with Jeno’s warmth practically radiating off of him. He definitely likes this better.

They talk about work, and how they’re bound to get busier with all the summer releases. Jeno details the project he’s working on right now, and how it can be launched soon. Jaemin recalls a day where his intern, Yangyang, made a report that convinced the production team to rethink their concept for a shoot. 

Then, they shift their conversation to the dreadful yearly office Halloween party, which they’ve both sworn not to go to anymore after last year’s disaster of a party that ended with a window smashed and someone clogging the office toilets with fake fingers. Besides, the best in costume awards were totally rigged, the one in the sexy pizza outfit really should not have won over the one with the who went as a bloodied beauty queen who almost had her crown snatched from her. Well, her crown  _ did _ get snatched from her in that sense.

Jaemin then starts rattling off ideas for costumes for him and Jisung. He doesn’t really like Halloween all that much, but Jisung liked dressing up and seeing his little pumpkin bucket filled with candy, so he’ll oblige him. So far, he’s only really come up with Snowball and Max as the first contender, and maybe Bruni and Olaf for the second contender, but he doesn’t have any more solid choices other than those. Jeno chuckles, promising to help him look for more.

When Jeno finishes the first application of bleach, he puts Jaemin’s hair into a shower cap, then carefully taking off the gloves and setting them aside. He goes over to sit in front of Jaemin, idly bumping knees with him.

“How do you think Jisung would react?” he wonders aloud.

“You’ve never done this before, right?”

“Never.”

A corner of Jeno’s mouth tilts up. “I bet he’ll love it. You’re going to look like one of the characters he sees on those shows.”

The thought makes Jaemin grin. He’ll probably get lots of hair tugs over the next weeks if Jisung is fascinated with it, but he’ll endure.

He mindlessly traces the heart on the inside of his wrist. “Thank you for today,” he says, feeling the glitter under his fingertips. “You’ve made Jisung so happy.”

This seems to take Jeno a little by surprise. “The day isn’t over yet.”

“Thank you, still,” Jaemin breathes. “He’s having so much fun with you here. I appreciate it very much.”

It’s been a while since he’s seen him that excited and happy about things, and it warms Jaemin’s heart. He was starting to become afraid that he just wasn’t doing enough, that nothing he’s doing is right, but Jeno was showing him that it was much easier than he thought it would be.

He hears Jeno exhale slowly. “I love being able to do that. Jisung is honestly one of the best babies I’ve ever met, and it’s no surprise because his dad is, frankly, the best too.”

That makes Jaemin chuckle, and he slaps the back of his hand weakly against Jeno’s arm. “Flirting now, are we?”

Jeno shrugs, the smile on his face wide. “Maybe. What if I am?”

Pretending to nudge him away, Jaemin can’t help the laugh bubbling out of him. “You’ve come a long way. Can’t believe you could barely look at me during that first meeting.”

This time, Jeno pushes him. “Let’s not.”

Jaemin gets close enough to plant a smooch on Jeno’s perfect nose. “Okay.”

When Jaemin rinses off the bleach, Jeno stands by the door, asking him if he needs any help. Other than Jaemin’s back really hurts from bending over the bathtub to wash it off, he tells him that he can manage.

He comes out of the bathroom with a damp shirt and a crick in his neck. Jeno tries to get some of the ache away with his hands, and Jaemin lets himself melt into it. This is nice. He allows himself this nice thing.

While Jeno dries his hair, he thinks of all the other nice things he should really allow himself. Like late-night cuddles in front of the TV. Like popping open one of the bottles of wine his brother-in-law has given him for all the past Christmases and drinking a glass while tangled up in sheets. Like taking time to actually stroll in the park, inhale nature and just not have any set place to go. Stuff like that.

God, he doesn’t really remember the last time he’s done any of those things. He’s long learned not to miss them in the way that it aches, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t wish for an opportunity to experience them again.

He thinks of doing them with Jeno. Jaemin’s well aware that they only have two full days after this day, but it wouldn’t hurt too much to think about it. They’re nice thoughts, and even though they will never see the light of day, he’s content to have them.

What would it be like to have Jeno for a bit longer? He can’t allow himself to think too far into the future. Many things can change, and there’s no way he can tell how things will pan out. But what if, just what if, Jeno can stay for a day, a week longer? Just delay going home, even for just a bit more?

Unlikely, though. They both have lives to go back to. Things had long been set to go back to their normal. Normal wasn’t sad, no, but what they have now feels better.

He’s not sure how he’ll break the news to Jisung. The tot tended to miss the people he’s learned to become close to, and Jeno leaving was sure to start many questions and confusion. He can always assure that Jeno would be back at some point, but he couldn’t promise it.

Well, it wasn’t only Jisung who’d miss him.

“Hey, Jeno,” he begins, and he hears Jeno hum behind him. “How about we go to the beach tomorrow?”

“Which beach?”

“I have one in mind.”

“A surprise?” Jeno chuckles, his touch warm on Jaemin’s nape. “Are we going to have a honeymoon, Mr. Na?”

Jaemin tilts his head back, smiling up at him. “Maybe.”

“How do we get home in time for work on Monday?”

“Don’t you trust me?” Jaemin reaches up, caressing Jeno’s cheek. “I’m magic. I’ll get us home in time.”

Jeno shakes his head, but his eyes are crinkling from the force of his grin. “Alright then. Come on, sit up, I’ll have to bleach your hair one more time.”

So Jaemin lets him do just that, while he relaxes once more. He knows Jisung will wake up pretty soon, and will most likely wander into the living room and wonder what is going on. For now, though, he allows himself the break.

Jisung does wake not so long after, waddling into the living room while clutching an elephant plushie tightly. “Appa…”

“I’m here, Jisung-ah!” he calls out, raising a hand to wave. Jeno is just finishing with coating his hair in the dye, so Jisung should be able to see the color now.

The tot slows down in front of Jaemin, not comprehending what he’s seeing. His brows furrow.

“I’m getting my hair dyed, Jisung,” Jaemin explains, reaching out his hands. Jisung takes one, drawing closer. “Can you see what color it is?”

Frowning, Jisung tries to touch it, but Jaemin holds that other hand. “No, baby, you can’t touch it. It’s not allowed for babies.”

The baby plops down on Jaemin’s thighs with a pout. “I promise you can touch it when it’s done, okay?” Jaemin offers, poking at a cheek. “Can you tell me what color it is?”

Considering for a long moment, where he looks up at Jaemin with wide eyes, Jisung answers with, “Gween.”

Jaemin chuckles. “Close, but not quite.” He boops Jisung’s nose. “Try again, baby. What color is it?”

Scrunching his face in concentration, Jisung thinks again. Jaemin wants to take a photo of this face and keep it in his wallet. “Broo!”

Jaemin plants a smooch on his cheek. “You’re right! That’s great, Jisung-ah.”

When Jeno finishes with the application, he washes his hands and goes to distract Jisung for the time being, keeping him away from Jaemin while they wait for the dye to process. Jaemin cleans up and washes everything, then taking a seat by the kitchen counter to watch the two.

They’re playing what looks like an intense game of toy cars, with Jisung’s cars somewhere above his head as he’s making loud sounds. Jeno mirrors the sounds, his eyes widening as he exaggerates the motions with his own set of tiny automobiles. The tot giggles, nearly doubling over from the force of it.

Jaemin knows he’ll miss moments like this the most.

Rinsing out the dye is even more of an ordeal than the two applications of bleach, because Jisung wanders into the bathroom every so often to tug on Jaemin’s pajama bottoms and ask if he can see already. He manages to finish rinsing, after about half an hour, and Jeno towels his hair dry while he carries Jisung into his arms. The baby is understandably excited about it, jumping around in Jaemin’s arms so much that he has to put him down.

While Jeno blowdries his hair, Jaemin tugs Jisung into his lap, tickling him and kissing him all over his face. When the tot gets tired, he lets him examine his blue-dyed fingers, turning them over and over and looking at them like Jaemin’s suddenly turned into an alien.

As soon as his hair is (mostly) dry, Jisung stands up to look at it. His hands pass over it curiously, unsure about what he’s seeing, until Jaemin tells him it’s okay to touch it. Apparently, to the tot, “touching” means tugging on fistfuls of it, and Jaemin winces as his sensitive scalp is being tugged at. Jeno tries to get Jisung to be more gentle, which amounts to the baby’s grip loosening but not entirely going away.

“Pretty,” Jisung mumbles.

“You think it’s pretty, Jisung-ah?” Jeno asks. Jaemin doesn’t have to turn to know he’s smiling.

With a nod, Jisung settles back onto Jaemin’s lap, still trying to reach for the longer strands. “Appa pretty.”

Fingers card through Jaemin’s newly dyed hair gently. “Yes, he is.”

♡

The thing about Jisung, apparently, is that he never actually shuts up. Donghyuck was right.

He babbles all the way to the toy store with the adjoining arcade. It’s just a walk down from the Na house, so Jisung walks in between him and Jaemin, his hands enclosed in theirs. Every now and then, they’d lift him off the ground, getting excited squeals from him as he kicks his yellow boot-clad feet in the air.

From right before they left, Jisung had already launched into a full-on story about something. Jeno had picked up on words such as “horsey” and “castle” at the beginning, when he carried Jisung out of the house, but he hasn’t really got the rest of it. Jaemin nods and smiles at Jisung, saying “Oh, really?” and “Wow, that’s so cool!” every now and then. Jeno wonders how much he actually understands of it.

Jisung babbles right up to when he sees the toy store. They must come here pretty often if Jisung recognizes it easily, eyes widening even several steps away. He tries to wrench away from their hold, but Jaemin tells him to stay with them until they’re inside the store. Jeno thinks he sees a pout, but it’s easily overshadowed by the sheer excitement that tot has about getting into the toy store.

By the time they’re in the store, Jaemin lets him go, Jisung running as fast as his two-year-old legs can go (pretty fast, apparently, because Jeno finds himself breathing a little heavier when he catches up). Even at his age, he seems to know where all the different sections are, immediately going to the section with all the toy cars. His hand comes up to tug at Jeno’s shirt, urging him to come along.

Peering at all the different cars in their packages, Jisung mumbles all possible reiterations of “wow” and car noises. He points at the green ones, sitting down on the linoleum when Jeno hands the boxes to him. A particular green truck is cradled to his chest pretty much the rest of the time they’re in the car aisle.

In the next one, Jeno lifts him into his arms to see the toys placed higher up. He seems to recognize the ones of the characters from the shows he watches. When Jeno holds up an  _ Octonauts _ set, Jisung pats it with his hand curiously.

Soon, Jaemin calls them over to a low table with what seems like a whole Lego mat. He’s in one of the chairs meant for kids up to the age 8, his long legs nearly folded to his chest. Jeno puts Jisung on one of the seats, handing him the plastic container full of pieces. A small hand attempts to grab as many pieces as possible, haphazardly throwing them to the mat.

Jeno sits on the puzzle mat beside him, taking some pieces to show him how to do it. Across from them, Jaemin is already engrossed in his own work. It’s cute, how both father and son are so easily caught up in working on something when given the chance.

The pieces are smaller than what he has at home, and Jeno has to keep close watch to make sure he doesn’t put any in his mouth. After Jeno’s demonstration of making a very abstract version of a robot, he follows with his own creation. Other kids are coming to this table too, peering curiously at the baby as they work.

In the end, Jaemin ends up making a little castle, complete with the flags on top of the towers. Jisung ends up with something he calls a kitty, and Jeno just agrees with him.

They end up in the aisle of more toddler-friendly toys soon after. The first thing Jisung finds is a doctor’s kit. Both Jaemin and Jeno crouch down so that Doctor Jisung can check the sound of their hearts. He tells them that both their heartbeats are too fast, and Jeno laughs at that remark.

Jaemin is listening to a saleslady market a scooter to him when a little kid approaches Jeno, who is standing to the side. The kid looks up at him with wide, curious eyes, and for a moment, Jeno doesn’t know what to say. So he just has a mini staring contest with the 2-year-old, and it seems like he’s losing.

“Hey there,” he manages after a few seconds. “Are you lost?”

The kid doesn’t have time to answer before she’s promptly scooped up by a pair of arms. The arms belong to a woman who is most likely her mom, and who is softly berating her for running away, smoothing over her hair. “I’m sorry, mister. She runs off sometimes without us knowing.”

“It’s alright,” he says. “She didn’t do any harm.”

After fussing over her daughter a bit more, the mother turns to look at Jaemin explaining the scooter to Jisung and pushing him gently to show that it moves. She hums to herself. “Your family’s beautiful.” The smile she gives Jeno is warm. 

It gives Jeno pause. He follows her gaze, seeing Jisung trying to push himself forward with his feet. Jaemin is there, arms open to catch him if he falls, but ultimately letting him do whatever he can manage. The growing grin on Jaemin’s face is full of pride.

His family. He hasn’t heard anyone else directly refer to them as that outside of each other and the people involved in the video. It was a new experience to hear it from a complete stranger, and with such awe.

A part of him knew that technically, they could be referred to as that what with the whole situation. But he didn’t truly, fully register that that’s what they are: a family. However short of a time he’s been with them, he’s been welcomed, he cares for them, and they both care about him too. Circumstances were not the usual, really, but no family is ever exactly the same with another.

He feels a tug, somewhere deep inside him.  _ Family _ . Jeno decides he likes how that sounds.

Watching Jaemin gently pry Jisung away from the scooter so they can look at other toys, he wonders how the other man would’ve reacted if he heard that remark. To be told that their family was beautiful.

Jaemin looks up at him then, beaming as he hoists Jisung into his arms. “Hey,” he greets, bouncing Jisung in his hold a bit. “I think he’s gonna want to come back to that scooter later.”

“Yeah?”

“Mm-hmm.” Jisung leans out of his arms, wanting to go to Jeno. Without hesitation, Jeno takes him, holding him close. The baby is saying something about wanting to ride the scooter again.

“What was that lady saying to you?” Jaemin asks when they’ve walked to the soft toys section. He’s running his hands through the soft fuzz of all the plushies.

Jeno leans over a bit, letting Jisung grab whatever toy he wants to hold. “Oh, uh. She was apologizing for her daughter coming up to me, said she ran off. I told her it was okay.”

Jaemin huffs out a laugh. “Toddlers do that.” He picks out a light blue bunny, pushes its ears back fondly. “I saw her smiling at us.”

It’s hard to fight the way that the corners of his own mouth tug upwards. Jeno takes a deep breath. “She said I had a beautiful family.”

That makes Jaemin look at him, eyes just a fraction wider and his mouth open. He seems to want to say something, but he can’t get the words out.

Raising his eyebrows at him, Jeno moves to put Jisung down so the tot can explore on his own. Jisung gravitates towards the life-size teddy bear in the corner, looking up at its huge head. “You okay, Nana?”

Taking in a breath, Jaemin closes his mouth, nods. “Yeah. Yeah. I–yeah.”

With an elbow, Jeno gently nudges him. “Was that...not okay?”

Alright, he’s admittedly scared of the answer. He was having such nice thoughts about the whole thing earlier, but he doesn’t want to continue them if Jaemin doesn’t like how quick it’s becoming. Of course, he doesn’t want to overstep and assume things that just aren’t what is there.

About a dozen different emotions flit across Jaemin’s face in that minute that he waits for the answer. It feels like his own heart is dropping to the pit of his stomach, but he’s trying to keep it where it is. He really shouldn’t overreact about the whole thing, it’s not his place.

The moment that minute passes, Jaemin looks over at Jisung, now trying his best to hug the huge bear. He’s less than half of it, and the whole thing dwarfs his tiny frame. Jaemin takes another breath, and Jeno isn’t sure if he really hears it be shaky.

“It’s okay,” he gets out. He’s blinking slowly. “I just… I don’t think I’ve heard that about us before.”

And the way he says it, Jeno just knows he means that he’s never heard it said about the two of them before. For all of Jaemin’s care and the overflowing love he has, for all of Jisung’s liveliness and how endearing he is, they’ve never been told that.

He wonders why. What else could people have seen with them, this father-son duo that’s so in sync, with such a deep, beautiful understanding of each other and the world that they’re in. Jisung may be two, but he’s been able to pick up on things easily, from expressions to habits to a change in his father’s tone. Jaemin never quite says it, but he sees everything too, without much words needing to be said to explain. Together, with their matching smiles bright and their inherent softness with everything, Jeno wonders why no one has ever told them that they’re a beautiful family.

Why, when Jaemin was gentle when the world was anything but to him? Why, when Jisung never let much dampen his mood, always trying his best to cheer up Jeno, almost a stranger to him? Why, when the light and warmth in Jaemin’s eyes can rival the sun when he makes Jisung giggle? Why, when even after long hours in the daycare, Jisung will always look for the home of Jaemin’s arms? Why, when they nestle so naturally into each other, and every bit of exhaustion in Jaemin’s shoulders disappears once he gets to hold his son?

Jeno thinks he hasn’t seen a family more beautiful. And oh, he knows he wants to be part of it too.

Sidling up to Jaemin, he puts an arm around him. Jaemin goes, his own arm wrapping around Jeno’s waist. It’s almost an embrace, but he seems to think the better of it.

“Jaemin,” Jeno says softly. Jaemin looks up at him, all wide eyes filled with uncertainty. “This family is beautiful, and I’ll keep reminding you that.”

He doesn’t say anything in reply, just falls into Jeno’s arms. Jisung is now plopped down in the middle of the bear’s fluffy legs, looking up at them curiously. Jeno reaches out a hand to him, urging him to be with them too.

Pushing himself up, Jisung comes over to them, practically colliding with their legs. Jaemin breaks the embrace momentarily to welcome him, smoothing a hand over his hair. The baby is confused, not understanding completely why Jaemin looks so emotional. Chuckling, Jaemin crouches down and smooches the top of his head.

“Family,” Jaemin breathes out, gazing up at Jeno.

With a smile, Jeno joins them by crouching as well. Jisung reaches out a hand to touch his face. “Family.”

♡

They come home after the sun has set, Jisung nestling into Jeno’s shoulder and Jaemin letting his son hold onto a finger as they walk.

At home, Jeno carefully sits down on the couch, cradling the tot to him. Jaemin sets down all their stuff on the kitchen countertop, thinking about putting them away later. For now, he just wants to cuddle up to the two on the couch, and maybe just not do anything else for the rest of the Saturday.

He pulls on a takeout flyer from the fridge, planning to just have some food delivered because it seems unlikely anyone in this house would want to actually cook something. Jaemin brings it to the living room, sidling up to Jeno and resting his head on his free shoulder.

“What do you want to get for dinner?” he asks, pulling his knees up. Jisung is awake but drowsy, and his little feet nudge at Jaemin. 

Jeno hums, thinking about it. He looks down at where the tot is curled up on his lap. “What are our options?”

Before Jaemin can answer, the doorbell rings throughout the house, startling all three of them. Jisung immediately perks up, sitting straight in Jeno’s arms and clambering to stand up. “Appa,” he says, pointing to the door.

With a quick ruffle to Jisung’s head, he goes to answer. The doorbell is by the gate outside, so he opens the door, walking to the gate and opening it just a bit to see who’s outside. On the opposite side of the gate, he sees two familiar faces. 

_ Shit. _

He opens the gate all the way, greeting the visitors. His brother does a double take.

“Jaemin?” he asks, unsure if he’s seeing right. “Are you… blue?”

Freezing for just a moment, Jaemin feels his eyes widen. He forgot absolutely everything. He forgot to tell his brother about the arrangement for the week, he forgot they were coming over for dinner, he forgot to tell him anything about Jeno. And well, he obviously did not mention the hair.

“Yeah.” He finds his voice. It’s shaky, but he goes on. “It is.”

Confusion passes over Jaehyun’s face. “Why? I mean, you’re allowed to, but I don’t think I ever saw you with an unnatural hair color before. Are you alright?”

Next to him, his husband has what looks like a casserole dish in his hands. Jaehyun himself has plastic bags with what seems like boxes of chicken, judging from the scent. 

“Uh.” Jaemin takes a deep breath, knowing that he can’t really escape anything now that his brother is here. “Just wanted a change.”

“Okay...” Jaehyun says. He peeks over Jaemin’s shoulder. “Can we come in?”

“Oh! Yeah. Yeah, of course.” He almost stumbles as he goes up to the door, inputting the code to open it. His brother and his husband follow close behind, peeking into the house.

“Jisung-ah!” Doyoung calls out, excited to see his nephew. “We’re here–”

It’s almost at the same time that the pair notice Jeno. Jeno, who Jaemin hasn’t told them anything about, not even why he’s here. Jaemin kind of wants to run away, but there’s nowhere to run.

Jaehyun’s eyes are wide, his brows raised. He keeps opening and closing his mouth, trying to find what to say. “Uh…”

Clearing his throat, Jaemin manages a, “Jaehyun hyung, Doyoung hyung. This is my husband, Jeno.”

From the couch, Jeno manages a wave, failing at stopping Jisung from bounding off of his lap and straight to clinging to Doyoung’s legs.

“Your...what?”

Jaemin takes another deep breath. He takes the plastic bags from his brother, sets them down on the dining table quickly. “I’ll explain.”

Something about his expression makes Jaehyun nod, albeit a little slowly. He turns to his husband, saying that they need to talk, and Doyoung nods understandingly. Anyways, he won’t be able to move much with Jisung holding onto him like he hasn’t seen him in a year.

Making a reassuring touch on Jeno’s elbow and offering a tiny smile, he leads Jaehyun to the master bedroom. He’s not sure how Jeno will hold up, but Jaemin mentally crosses all of his fingers.

It’s a good thing the bedroom wasn’t a mess of baby clothes and other things, so they can both sit on the bed comfortably. Jaehyun stares at the closed door, looking like he’s trying to find answers there. Jaemin keeps biting his own tongue.

“I can explain,” Jaemin says. In his lap, his fingers are twisted together. 

Jaehyun is blinking his eyes a little too quickly, still not looking at Jaemin. “Yeah, I think I’m gonna need to hear everything.”

Truthfully, Jaemin hasn’t really come up with a way to explain everything. He had kept putting it off, thinking that he still had time to mull it over. But every time he thought he had a grasp on the whole thing, he either got too caught up or he got too confused about what was happening. He knew the whole concept of the video, the whole reason why they were here. However, things just weren’t panning out the way he thought they would.

He feels guilty about not telling his brother. Jaehyun was so close to him, so dear, that he knew so much of Jaemin’s life. Even the littlest things, the most mundane, Jaemin had a habit of telling him. A likely product of him being homesick the entire time he was in college and he would retell his day to his best friend from the beginning, his own brother. It was a comforting practice.

Jaemin knows that Jaehyun is very confused right now, and most likely hurt that Jaemin hadn’t said a single word about this whole thing. They had established that they had separate lives, but surely something as important as this should have come up at least once.

“He’s…” Jaemin bites his lip, looking at the pillow on Jeno’s side of the bed. “He’s my husband for a week.”

At this, Jaehyun whips his head around to look at him, eyebrows nearly raising to his hairline. Before he can get a word in, Jaemin continues. “It’s a video thing. For work. It’s part of this series where strangers live together as spouses for the whole week to see if they can work out somehow during that week.”

His brother takes in a breath, then pinches the bridge of his nose. “So, he’s just here for the week?”

“Yeah, he’s leaving by Tuesday.”

Jaehyun seems to process this, nodding a little. “So, how is it? The...marriage?”

Twisting his fingers into the sheets, Jaemin replies, “Been pretty good. We are able to handle the chores, plus Jisung, and I’d say we’re now okay with sharing a bed and all.”

He leaves out the kissing and the stolen smooches, because as much as he trusts Jaehyun with stories of his days, he thinks that details like that are best left out.

“And how is he? Good to you?”

“He’s super nice and kind and he cares so much for the two of us.” Jaemin feels his breath catch in his throat. “Jeno’s so good to us, without either of us asking. I… I appreciate him very much.”

He hopes that his brother doesn’t notice the blood rushing to his face. 

Sighing, Jaehyun nudges him with an elbow. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

There it is. Jaehyun’s always been kinda good at masking hurt, at least in front of Jaemin, but Jaemin knows better. He can hear the slightest twinge in his voice.

“I’m sorry.” He looks down onto his lap. “I honestly kept putting it off until I just. Forgot. I really should’ve at least given you a heads up or something.”

A hand comes up to rub soothingly at his back. “It’s alright. We’re just surprised.”

Jaemin looks up at him. His older brother was gentle, in a way that he thinks nobody else is. Jaehyun was always listening, always observing, and he’d act based on what he’s found out to make sure he doesn’t unintentionally hurt anyone or make them uncomfortable. He wasn’t very touchy to most, but his ways of showing affection were clear enough if you knew where to find them. 

He’s especially fond of Jaemin. They’re only 3 years apart, but it doesn’t even feel like that sometimes. Most of the time, it was like talking to someone his age, as Jaehyun understood him better than anyone else. They grew up together, cried together, laughed together. 

Jaehyun might roughhouse with his friends, but Jaemin was always protected, no matter the circumstance. Not babied, not necessarily, since Jaehyun was the one that taught him to stand up when he was down, to hold his head high when everything crumbled. Everything will be okay, he just needed to keep going without letting his past burden him. That was why it was in the past, for him to leave so he can be someplace better.

He even called Jaemin the stronger of the two of them, but Jaemin never believed that. To him, his brother was so much steadier, so much more likely to have his life together. He had looked up to him his whole life, because Jaehyun looked like he understood everything about the world, all those things that Jaemin can’t even hope to comprehend.

His brother had been through hell and back, he knew, and yet he cared for everyone with such gentleness. He always, always stood taller after everything that tried to beat him down. Jaemin isn’t sure if he can be that strong.

“I’m sorry again,” Jaemin offers, because he doesn’t know what to say.

Jaehyun gives him a soft smile, pulls him in with an arm around the shoulder. “It’s okay, really. I’m happy that you’ve found someone like him.”

Pursing his lips, Jaemin twists his fingers together again. “Again, he’s leaving on Tuesday, so.”

The arm around him draws him in tighter. “Still. It’s great that you have him, no matter how short your time together is. I don’t know him that well yet, but I’m grateful that it seems like it’s a good match.”

Jaemin doesn’t say anything, which tells Jaehyun exactly what he knows he’s been curious about. Sighing, Jaehyun lets him go, but Jaemin feels his stare on him.

“Jaem,” he says, so quiet. “This is more than just a video, is it?”

He doesn’t know how to answer that. Honestly, lines have been blurred so much that he’s not sure what any of this is. Jaemin never likes clinging to something too much, especially when he knows that it won’t be his to keep. It’s just not worth it to him if he’s going to lose it in the end.

A hand comes to rest on his knee, squeezing gently. “I don’t like asking you this, you know, but I feel like I need to.”

Jaemin squeezes his eyes shut for a second. He knows exactly what his brother will ask, and he can’t really get away from that now. He gulps in a deep breath, before opening his eyes to his lap again.

“How do you feel about him? Please be honest with me, Jaem.”

And it makes something in Jaemin want to curl up in his brother’s embrace. He was able to admit it to himself, but to anyone else? He’s just not sure.

So he goes with an answer that he knows is true, and doesn’t feel too damning to admit like this. “He makes me happy.”

It was a feeling he knew was present the whole week. Jeno made him happy, in the way that he was always so genuine in his intentions. He cared about them, did all these little things that he learned they liked, just to see them smile. He was helpful at every opportunity, considerate and careful. Jeno went along with nearly everything without complaint, even though Jaemin knew that he wasn’t having the easiest time with adjusting to everything, especially with Jisung. He tried and he tried and he tried, and it made Jaemin feel so many things, and happiness was the one he could identify easily.

That’s just how it was, he guesses. Everything’s easy, in the way they fall into conversation about anything and nothing in particular. In the way that they fall into each other now, with little of the hesitation they used to have. In the way that their hands slot together, never really perfect but it still fits. Easy.

Jaehyun squeezes again. “Jaem, are you scared?”

And then, Jaemin feels his breath hitch, just a bit, right at his throat.

“I’m not.” When he says it, it feels true. “I–I used to be.”

“What changed?”

He looks up, looks into his brother’s warm brown eyes. The breath he takes is shaky. Jaemin holds the gaze.

“It’s him, it’s me, it’s us.” There aren’t any tears, and his breath doesn’t hitch anymore. “I look at him and I’m not scared. I don’t want to be anymore.”

The smile that Jaehyun gives is watery, so close to crying. Jaehyun never cries. “Jaem,” he says, a hand coming up to cradle his younger brother’s head like he used to when they were kids and Jaehyun was undeniably proud. He huffs out a breath, like he’s trying not to lose it.

“Hyung,” Jaemin says, closing his eyes. “I won’t be scared anymore, not when he makes me this happy. Not when it’s so easy with him.”

And Jaemin very nearly cries himself. Jaemin doesn’t cry either. He sounds so sure, so ready to admit this out loud. Quite frankly, he didn’t know he’d get to that point. He’d always thought he could just push it down before it got out of hand, but he realizes now that there’s no point.

He really shouldn’t be scared anymore, not when Jeno holds his hand like nothing can ever go wrong again. Maybe with him, that will be true.

Jaemin is crushed into a hug the next moment. His brother smells like cotton and the fried chicken place and home. Jaehyun holds him, and Jaemin feels like he’s 12 years old, feeling his brother’s heart swell.

“That’s all I want for you, Jaem. You deserve so, so much to be happy.”

He knows this, of course he does. It’s just that, in the blur of work and having to take care of his son, most of the time, Jaemin forgets. He really should remember that more often, but now he’s just basking in the fact that he is. He  _ is _ happy.

Later, when they come out to see their husbands engaging a very-awake Jisung in pretend eating the play food he serves them. Jaemin knows full well that Jaehyun is smiling at the sight, so happy and so, so much in love.

Jaemin is, too.

♡

Jeno and Doyoung are on dish duty, and Jeno has no idea what to say.

During dinner, the couple had asked him questions conversationally. Jeno had felt that they were trying to learn more about him, and not actually get him for a night of interrogation. They were hesitant, since he is new to them, but they did relax at some point, which was a relief.

Of the two, Jaehyun seemed to want to know more. That was understandable. Jaemin was his younger brother after all. Jeno got the impression that he was protective of Jaemin, and just wanted the best for him.

They acted like he was someone they expected to see again, which wasn’t really likely. Of course, they were aware of the situation, but it felt like they were willing to welcome him into their weekly dinners again next week. And the week after that. And the week after that. Like they were planning to warm up to him more, get to know him better.

He went along with it.

Now, with the brothers on the couch, Jisung falling asleep in his uncle’s arms as they watch  _ Tangled _ , Doyoung and Jeno are left to themselves.

Doyoung doesn’t seem like the type to warm up easily, but he is kind and attentive, listening to what Jeno has to say, even though there’s not much. Jeno has the feeling that he also prefers to observe first, trying to know them through their habits and how they speak.

It’s quiet for a while, with Jeno washing the dishes and Doyoung putting them away with practiced ease. He’s done this a lot at this house, obviously. Sometimes, Jeno wonders what their dinners were like when he wasn’t suddenly in the picture.

When Doyoung speaks up, Jeno didn’t quite expect his words.

“They’re very alike, you know?”

Jeno looks up from where he’s scrubbing at the casserole dish. “The...brothers?”

He gets a small nod. “Jaehyun always told me that they were so different, opposites even, but I’m coming to learn that that isn’t true.”

Stealing a glance to the living room, where it seems the brothers are also nodding off, Jeno lets out a chuckle. “How are they alike?”

Doyoung leans against the counter, putting down the last plate. “Well, for starters, nobody is as competitive as them.”

That startles a laugh from Jeno. “Really?”

The older man nods again, the beginnings of a fond smile on his lips. “Yeah. One time, our friend joked that if both of them got bit by a zombie, they’d fight it because they’re too stubborn to admit they lost.”

It makes Jeno snort. “Oh my god.”

“That’s honestly the most true analysis I’ve heard of them.” Doyoung shakes his head, huffing out a laugh. “You should see them with gifts. Be it on birthdays or Christmas or anniversaries. I don’t think I’ve ever seen two people be so aggressive about gifts of all things.”

“Ah, I’d love to see it.” Jeno goes back to cleaning the remnants of the burnt cheese on the dish. “Too bad I can’t.”

He hears how the other man shifts position, heaving in a breath. “You’re really leaving on Tuesday?”

All Jeno can do is nod. Even without looking up, he knows Doyoung’s dark eyes are on him, seeing things he might not be aware he put on display.

“That’s a shame. Jaemin really likes you.”

The dish almost slips from his hands. He puts it down in the sink gently, trying not to make his breathing too obvious.

“You’re –you’re sure.” It’s not a question.

Doyoung takes a moment to respond, and in that moment, he lets out a soft sigh. “Yes.”

“How–”

“I told you,” Doyoung says, and it’s little above a whisper. “They’re very alike.”

Jeno looks up at him then, trying to comprehend. He sees Doyoung’s expression soften even more, his originally crossed arms coming to rest at his sides.

For a quick moment, Doyoung glances to the living room, where all three are now very much asleep in the middle of the pub sequence in  _ Tangled _ . He sighs again, and the fond smile on his face grows a fraction.

“I didn’t notice it then, you know?” he begins. His hands are pushing his sleeves up to his elbows. “How could I, when it was only noticeable when I looked away?”

Furrowing his brows, Jeno asks, “What was noticeable?”

The other man turns to face him again, expression sincere. “The way Jaehyun looked at me. I never knew, all those years. It had to be pointed out to me, be it through stolen photos or video evidence courtesy of our friends. It took me close to a decade to see it.”

There’s a lump forming in Jeno’s throat. He swallows it down. “How did he...How did he look at you?”

The smile grows, and Doyoung seems to glow under the orangey kitchen lights. “They described it as him looking at me like I personally hung all the stars in the sky. Our friends are poetic, you see. From what I saw, he smiled at me like he realized: This is it. This is him.” Doyoung lets out an exhale. “It was so easy to miss, if you hadn’t been looking. Jaehyun always looked away, so I never knew.”

Jeno nods, taking that in. During dinner, he had seen Jaehyun look at Doyoung like that, if only fleetingly. They were married, and yet it seemed like he was still that boy with a crush on Doyoung. It was cute, Jeno had thought.

“So, from then, I knew how to see it. From then on, I couldn’t stop seeing it, feeling it. I just knew, that was Jaehyun looking at me because there are too many words in the world and humans just can’t seem to string them together correctly to make something comprehensible. Jaehyun was never big with words, but he’s always  _ looked _ .”

Doyoung’s hand traces over the clean plate, and Jeno follows the motion with his eyes. “And you see, after getting used to Jaehyun doing that, after seeing it for myself, I realized he wasn’t the only one who did that.”

His breath catches in his throat. Jeno dares a glance at the three figures bundled together on the couch under a too-short blanket. “Jaemin…?”

“Mm-hmm.” Doyoung nods. His eyes are soft when he looks at Jeno. “It took a few times for me to confirm, but I saw it. That’s how Jaemin looks at them too, at the people he just doesn’t have words for because nothing can quite encompass what he feels. He looks at them like they’re his world, like everything just comes to this.”

Jeno doesn’t think his lungs are functioning anymore when Doyoung follows with a: “And Jeno, he looks at you like everything comes down to you. He smiles at you when you’re not looking, because he’s found this happiness with you. And trust me when I say, I haven’t seen that with him in a while.”

Before Jeno can find anything to reply to that, his mind still a jumbled mess of questions and Doyoung’s words, Doyoung comes over to squeeze his shoulder reassuringly.

“I know it’s...a lot to take in. I don’t know what you feel, I don’t know how to tell with you. I’m not sure if you return that feeling that Jaemin has towards you. But whatever it is, however you feel, I want you to know that this home will still be open for you. If you choose not to leave, if you choose to come back, this home will still welcome you.”

He’s suddenly very thankful that he’s not holding anything breakable, because he knows he might as well have dropped it by now. Here Doyoung was, telling him all this, when so many doubts still plague his mind. When he’s still so unsure of what to do after this, and how he can go back to how his life was.

Frankly, he’s not sure he wants to. This house feels like home, with its sunshine and the soft sheets and the constant clatter of Jisung’s wooden toys against each other. It’s home, with Jisung bounding into his arms and Jaemin chuckling into his ear. God, it’s home, and he’s not sure if he can even leave it.

“I’ve known you for all of 4 hours, but I can’t deny that you care deeply about them. You don’t push, you don’t demand. You listen to them both, you’re patient, you’re understanding. You’ve helped in everything you can, and you seem so willing to learn. Do you know how important that is?” There’s a little break in Doyoung’s voice, as if he gets emotional just talking about it. “Did you know? That when you look at them, it’s like you’re looking at your whole world too.”

For a moment, Jeno feels struck. It’s a truth that maybe some part buried in him has known, and is just now coming to light. It’s true, he knows. 

Does Jaemin know? Does he see it too? Or is he just going on with life, not knowing of these stolen glances that they apparently share?

“I’m not doing this to convince you or anything.” Doyoung shakes his head. “It’s your choice, okay? But I just wanted you to see, before you miss it completely.”

Numbly, Jeno nods. He understands. There wasn’t much time left in their week, and soon enough, they should be back to life before this whole thing. If they didn’t see what was there now, they might never be able to see it.

“Okay,” he croaks out, thankful that at least his throat cooperates. “Okay.”

Doyoung withdraws, one hand lingering to pat him softly. “Just know, that whatever your decision is, you’ve made him and Jisung immensely happy, and that’s all we’ve ever wanted for them.”

Jeno looks at them again, at the family he knows he has now, and he thinks about how happy they’ve made him too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so so so much for being patient and sticking with me to this point! i appreciate all your comments and feedback, i love reading through all of them ♡♡♡
> 
> we're getting closer to the end now......


	6. home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i had the biggest writer's block with this one hhhhhh  
> however! i really liked writing this chapter, i hope you enjoy it! ♡
> 
> (also, rereading comments on past chapters helped so much, i love each and every one of u)

**『** ** _The day when we were looking at the sunset_** ** _  
_** ** _And when I said that I was lucky to find you_** ** _  
_** ** _It was quite a time ago_** ** _  
_** ** _Now, the sunset is the beginning of a night_** **』**

♡

**DAY 6**

“Ready to go?”

Jaemin has Jisung propped up on one hip, their matching shirt and shorts combo making them look straight out of a summer catalogue. In Jaemin’s other hand is a packed bag, thrown together last minute but probably more organized than it seems.

Placing the last of the drinks they’re bringing into the cooler and snapping the lid shut, Jeno smiles at them. “Ready.”

They’re going to the beach today. It’s a two-hour drive from the house, so they’re leaving a little early. Jisung is still a bit grumpy at being woken up early, but the prospect of going to the beach has perked him up.

After loading all their stuff and securing Jisung into his car seat, Jeno climbs into the driver’s seat. Jaemin is in the passenger seat, ruffling his now blue hair. There’s already a glow to him, even though they haven’t even left yet. Jeno thinks that his brother’s visit was good to him.

Their trip doesn’t seem quite as long, with Jisung pointing out everything he sees and Jaemin dancing to pretty much every song on their playlist, be it a nursery rhyme or a pop song from the early 2000s. It’s a bright day, the late spring sun warm on their skin. Halfway through it, Jaemin takes out some of the sandwiches and somehow manages to feed both Jeno and his son while in the passenger seat of a moving car.

It’s actually the date that Jaemin has planned for the week, and even though Jeno knows where they’re going, he’s not exactly sure what’s going to happen. He’s had suspicions of the father-son duo conspiring against him, judging by their sly looks his way and their giggles covered with their hands. They just might be planning on pushing Jeno into the sea and he has absolutely no idea.

Still, the mere prospect of them going on a trip away from the city already has everyone is a good mood, Jeno very much included. He doesn’t even remember the last time he actually went and had a little off day for himself that wasn’t spent in bed maxing out his Netflix subscription. Going out and about like this would be good for him, he knows.

With it being Monday the next day, he wants to escape reality for a bit, get sand between his toes and seawater in his hair. It was going to be the start of the new week, and their last full day together. He hasn’t thought about what he feels about that yet.

He had whatever he can fit into a relatively small bag, like a change of clothes and his own towel. Truthfully, Jeno had wanted to take at least one photo per day they were together so that he’d have something to put together at the end of the week, but he would keep forgetting. He wanted to take all the photos today, on their last full day together without their work hours getting in the way.

It’s a little bittersweet, how it’s all ending the day after tomorrow. He’s happy that he gets one last day to spend with Jaemin, without their hectic schedules and all these things they have to think about. It’s just going to be the three of them, enjoying each other’s company, no matter where Jaemin’s taking him.

The day after tomorrow, they’ll be at work, and they’ll be shooting the ending for the video. They’ll be shouting “divorce!” into the camera like all the other couples did, and they’ll be interviewed for their final thoughts. Jeno doesn’t know what to say yet, so he’ll probably just wing it when the day comes.

The day after tomorrow, Jeno is moving out of the house.

The thought had made him sigh, looking around. Within the walls of that place, they had laughed, they had shared meals, they had co-parented Jisung. It was more than that originally plain-looking house he went into some days ago, and it feels like there’s so much of him that’s going to be left here. He’s aware he’s thinking like they’re actually getting separated, like they really were something.

Jeno had finished packing for the trip, was then rooting around for an outfit to wear. Jisung was beside him, nudging him for a cuddle. He had picked the baby up, holding him close as he looks for a nice shirt.

“Do you think you’ll miss me, Jisungie?” he had asked, rubbing his cheek against the top of the baby’s head. “I’m sure I’ll miss you.”

The tot had nodded, nestling his head into Jeno’s neck.

He didn’t want to think about how he’ll miss all of that, how he’ll have to readjust to being back at his own place. Jeno didn’t want to think of what else he’ll miss.

When he had picked out everything for his outfit, he had made his way to the bathroom, depositing Jisung back to his father’s arms. He had spotted Jaemin preparing more food for the trip, and it made him smile to himself.

Okay, he could admit that he’ll miss that.

Pushing that fact to the back of his mind, Jeno keeps driving. The roads are unsurprisingly busy, but he doesn’t quite mind when the car is filled with music and laughter, sometimes interjected with a very detailed story of a daycare friend from the two-year-old. Jeno wouldn’t mind having more Sunday mornings just like this.

Even before hopping into the car, it had already been a great morning. Jeno woke up to the father-son duo with matching sleeping positions and the same errant tuft of hair sticking out, and try as he might to muffle his giggle, they both stirred in their sleep and turned towards him. Which only made him laugh even more. It was undeniable that they were related.

And, despite this whole thing being Jaemin’s idea, he tugged Jeno back into bed, saying that Sundays were for sleeping in. It took some convincing and one too many smooches to even get the man out of bed. That method also apparently works with Jisung, who Jaemin had to kiss all over his face and tiny hands for him to wake up.

Then, they had a breakfast of reheated leftovers from last night, as Jeno swiped through the photos Doyoung sent him of the brothers passed out on the couch together. Jaemin had sworn he’ll get back at his Doyoung hyung someday.

After breakfast, it was amusing to watch Jaemin try to get Jisung into the outfit while also unceremoniously shoving stuff into the bag. A change of clothes, check. Flip-flops, check. Sunscreen, check. Beach toys, check. Towels, check. Getting one sandal on Jisung before he ultimately runs away? Check. Jeno had scooped the baby into his arms and dressed him himself while Jaemin tried to cram more stuff into the bag.

Jeno and Jaemin both tried to prepare food for the day, sandwiches and cut-up fruit and little veggie and meat wraps. Keyword: tried, because a lot of it would end in either drowsy snuggles or occupying the tot while the other made the food. Still, they made enough (they think), and Jaemin just waved his hand, saying they could always try to find food near the beach.

It was going to be a day of just them and the sea, and Jeno hasn’t looked forward to something like this in quite a while.

“Do you like the sea, Jeno?” Jaemin asks while they’re at a stoplight.

Jeno turns to face him, tries not to be too transfixed at how the sunlight makes him look near-angelic. “I’m honestly more of a city boy than one of the sea. But I like it, though, whenever I get to go to it.”

At this, Jaemin chuckles softly. “I love the sea.”

Turning his gaze back to the road just as the light turns green, Jeno asks, “Why do you love it?”

There’s humming from the passenger seat as Jaemin mulls over his answer. Jisung has quieted down in the backseat, having been given his bottle of milk. For a while, there’s nothing but the sound of airconditioning and the last few lines of the song playing on the speakers.

He thinks of how these things mattered to Jaemin. Things like daylight and the greatest hits from decades ago and the coffee he makes for himself and mismatched photo frames and cartoon socks and roadtrips and holding hands and the sea. Jeno thinks of how there might be explanations for everything, and how he’d most likely never know all of them. That was okay. He’d learn about all the things that matter to Jaemin if he could.

“I’ll tell you later, yeah?” Jeno hears shuffling and he sees movement at the corner of his eye, like Jaemin has tucked his legs up to his chest.

“Okay.” 

They’re about half an hour away. He’ll know the answer soon.

♡

Looking at the two already playing by the shore, Jaemin almost suppresses a smile. He realizes what he’s doing, and doesn’t stop the grin that spreads across his features. It’s okay to smile, he reminds himself. It’s okay to be happy.

He’s left a few meters from the shore, setting up their little space. The blanket they brought might be a tad bit small, but he knows they can make it work. The thick umbrella is enough to shade him for the most part, and he’s opening the cooler to get a drink for himself. He also takes out Jisung’s sandcastle-building toys, intending to bring them to his son in a bit. 

The beach isn’t particularly full today. It’s just barely the end of spring, he reasons. Other than them, there’s only an elderly couple strolling along the shore with their dog and what looks like a group of teenagers soaking up the weekend sun. Jaemin thinks about how this beach might be full in a couple more weeks, and that they’ll barely get to go here much anymore.

Actually, Jaemin hasn’t been anywhere near the sea for about a year now. He’s missed it, missed how it felt to be so close to it that he could taste the salt in the air nearly every single day. There were days that he would visit on a whim, take his shoes and socks off and let the sea lap at his ankles. Nothing was quite as comforting as the water warmed by the sun, passing through his fingers like silk and clinging to the ends of his hair.

But life doesn’t quite allow him such things. Life will always be too busy, too far away, too everything for him to come back. Sometimes, he even wondered if he would be able to go back.

And now, he is. Well, not quite the sea he’s used to, not the one he introduced to a then-tiny Jisung, but it’s alright. It’s the sea all the same, and he’ll love it with the same heart.

The drive to the place wasn’t quiet, and Jaemin admits he likes it better when they aren’t. He let Jeno choose some of the songs that would play during their ride, and Jeno pulled out his own playlist. Unsurprisingly, it was full of songs that Jaemin enjoyed. At that point, he felt like they share a lot already.

During the drive, they also talked, a lot more than they did yesterday. Jaemin talked about the ridiculous emails he got, while Jeno talked about the friends he bumped into on the way to the gym. That was comforting. It felt like they were just so natural around each other, talking about the most mundane things. 

If he was going to be honest, the talking helped calm down Jaemin’s nerves. He had planned this trip for a while, and he wasn’t even sure how Jeno would react to it. The trip was the last big thing he could do before the week ended, and he wanted it to be special.

It had taken longer than expected to get there, but it didn’t seem like either of them mind. They passed the time singing along to the songs that Jeno plays, jokingly throwing snacks at each other, and bringing up every funny little thing that’s happened to them. It’s so much better than what Jaemin would have planned. 

Taking Jeno here was something he had planned since the beginning. No matter how the week went, he knew that he had to take him to somewhere that’s close to his heart. Admittedly, he had hoped that Jeno would be close to his heart by this time, so that the trip mattered even more. Jaemin surely got that.

Introducing Jeno to his brother and brother-in-law was what he knew would be like sliding a last piece into place. It was trusting that his family knew about him, about them and whatever was going on. The previous night was nothing that Jaemin would have expected, but it ended happier than he could have hoped for.

Family. God, he’s known that word for so long now, used it so often, but it feels different now. He looks at Jeno and Jisung making baby splashes at each other and it doesn’t ache. No, it spreads through him like sun-warmed seawater, so distinct and so comforting that he knows he can carry the feeling all the way home.

Jaemin takes out the camera. 

“Hey there!” he greets, smiling brightly into the lens. “We’re on day 6 now. Can you guess where we are?”

He allows a moment’s pause as he pans the camera to the beach. “Well, I suppose you can see now. We’re at the beach!”

Turning the camera to face him again, he raises his brows. “Why are we at the beach? Well, first of all, Jeno and I didn’t have a honeymoon so we’re making up for that now.”

Jaemin stifles a giggle at the thought of actually going on a honeymoon. “Second of all, it’s our second to the last day together, and we deserve the little vacation, even if it's just for a few hours.”

For a moment, he looks at the two still playing by the shore. He feels his smile get wider. “Third, why not? It’s a beautiful day, summer is just around the corner, and the beach is just here. I can’t think of a better way to spend a Sunday.”

He pauses. The sun is a little more prickly now, so he tucks his legs close so that he’s in the shade of the umbrella. Jaemin isn’t sure what face he’s making right now as he watches Jeno and Jisung, their squeals probably heard through the camera too. But he sure as hell feels the way his chest constricts ever so slightly.

“Second to the last day,” he repeats, making a little sigh. “We’ve gotten to this point, huh? I honestly didn’t think we would.”

About 6 days ago, the idea had just been proposed to him, and he couldn’t quite wrap his head around the fact that he was being chosen for this video. In fact, he wouldn’t even have considered that he would be part of the series if he didn’t know who Renjun was.

Six days since he met Jeno, since they were briefed in one of the meeting rooms. Six days since he thought about how different everything would be after it started. Six days since he told his son that they’ll be having a visitor over.

Overall, Jaemin can’t say he’s expected anything that’s happened so far.

“Honestly though, I kind of don’t want the week to end.” 

It feels nice to admit that, even just to himself and the camera. He knows that that bit will be kept in the final edit, and it would be admitting to pretty much the whole world. But for now, admitting it to himself, it’s good. Jaemin thinks this whole self-admission thing is great for him.

“I wish I can explain.” He shakes his head, letting the corners of his mouth tilt up. “I wish I could put into words how much the past days have made me feel. It’s so...weird, I guess. Weird, that it hasn’t been that long, and yet it feels like forever. Weird, that I feel like I haven’t stopped smiling.”

God, he can already imagine the field day Renjun is going to have once they get the footage. 

“It’s cheesy, I know.” He can barely stop the giggle bubbling out of him. Jaemin lets it out, reminding himself that keeping things in wasn't doing him any good. “But it’s true! I feel...happy.”

The world might see all of this, how he is absolutely hopeless now when it comes to Jeno, but it’s too late to take it back now. Not that he wants to, anyways.

“Okay, Jeno won’t even know about this until the video comes out.” Jaemin sucks in a breath. He knows he might start rambling soon, but he allows it. “I just want to say, these past 6 days have made me realize that given the choice, I would do this again. The whole marriage thing. Maybe for real the second time around, who knows?”

He realizes what he said after a moment. “Oh god, that’s fully exposing myself, but...yeah. Yeah. It’s out there now, huh? That Na Jaemin is now considering actual marriage.” Jaemin nods, turns back to the camera. “A lot of things can change in six days, folks.”

Turning the camera to face Jeno and Jisung, who seem to start trekking back to where he’s set up for their little picnic, Jaemin says, “I like this change.”

The camera is shut off just as the two arrive, Jisung rushing up to him to proudly show him the handful of shells he’s collected. Jeno plops down on the blanket next to Jaemin, reaching out to dust the sand off of the tot’s shorts and legs. He’s explaining how Jisung found all the matching shells by the shore and how he promised to put them in a jar soon.

Jaemin really does like this change.

♡

Jeno thinks the sunlight and seawater is doing something to him. He feels blissed out, a little too giggly, and like he’s a bit drunk on the sparkling cider Jaemin brought. Jisung is on his stomach, forming the little shells into all sorts of shapes, and he oddly just wants to laugh.

His head is in Jaemin’s lap, where flowers are being threaded into his hair. It’s making him sleepy, and it doesn’t help that Jaemin is cooing (to him or to Jisung, he does not know). The soft, soothing voice is only lulling him further, and he feels absolutely at peace.

They’ve just finished lunch, with half of it spent carrying Jisung near the sea and holding up the sandwich to him while he pointed at the boats in the horizon and the birds soaring in the sky and the dark seaweed tangling around their ankles. At some point, Jaemin had given Jeno the camera while he hoisted his son up on his shoulders, charging at the sea while Jisung’s excited squeals filled the air. Jeno isn’t sure how many photos he took, but he still thinks he hasn’t taken enough.

The tot was exhausted by the end of it, nearly falling asleep in Jaemin’s arms while Jaemin tried to get him to drink water from his chilled sippy cup. He perked up when his beach toys were brought out, and for a while, he just scooped sand and twigs into his bucket while Jeno tried to put more sunscreen on him. Jaemin promised they’ll come back to the water after a bit.

It’s barely been an hour after lunch, but Jeno can already say the day he’s enjoyed today. With the beach having almost no one here other than them, it’s almost like their own little world, just for them to enjoy for the time being. To him, it’s a simple luxury that he’s willing to indulge in.

He does fall asleep, with Jaemin’s fingertips dancing over his temples and Jisung adding little twigs to the shapes he’s forming on Jeno’s chest. The last thing he registers is the clear blue sky just beyond their beach umbrella.

Jeno dreams of deep emerald waters glimmering under the sun, that smile the father and son duo both have, and sweet, slightly warmed cider. He can feel it, that giggle that seems to eternally spill out of him, like he’s immeasurably, undeniably happy.

When he wakes, he’s not sure how long he’s been asleep. Jaemin isn’t cooing anymore, one hand in his hair while the other gently taking the shells away. On Jeno is a very asleep Jisung, his cheek smushed against his chest and his little fist clutching a handful of the tiny shells. Instinctively, Jeno raises a hand to stroke the rising and falling back of the tot.

“Hey there,” Jaemin greets, barely above a whisper. “Is he too heavy?”

Jeno shakes his head as best as he can. “No, it’s fine. How long was I out?”

Jaemin hums. “Time doesn’t matter on Sundays.”

It makes Jeno chuckle, and Jisung stirs. Pressing his lips into a line, he soothes the baby until he’s back into soundly sleeping. Jaemin laughs softly too.

“You can go back to sleep.” Jeno hears the shells clacking together as they fall to the blanket. “He won’t wake up for a while.”

The soft fabric of Jisung’s rashguard is still cool to the touch, even though it’s dry now. “Hey.” He reaches out a hand to poke gently at Jaemin’s cheek. “You said you’d tell me why you love the sea.”

And when Jaemin smiles, Jeno still loves the way it looks from this weird angle. The fingers in his hair twirl the locks.

“You wanna hear that now?”

A thumb swipes over his cheekbone, like the softest of kisses. He nods, blinking away the last of his bleariness.

Sighing, Jaemin turns to look at the sea, a handful of meters away. Jeno wishes he could see what expression he has right now.

“I grew up near a beach,” Jaemin begins, voice so soft it’s like he’s telling Jeno a secret. “That’s what I’ve known for so long, the feeling of sand and seawater and broken shells. My mom would sometimes get me because she always knew I’d be there, getting a sunburn and not being aware of what time it was anymore.”

When Jaemin chuckles, Jeno can feel it. He’s silent for a while after, reliving memories and seemingly searching them in the emerald of the waters. 

“That was life for, what, sixteen years?” He sounds like he doesn’t quite believe it. “Sixteen years of me rolling up my school pants and wading into the water, getting sand everywhere when I got home. Nothing really changed about that beach near our house. It was always the same, and it felt more like home than my own home did.”

Jeno thinks about the compact home that Jaemin and Jisung have now, and how far it is from the sea.

The hand in his hair is rubbing soothing circles into his scalp. “Jaehyun hyung used to take me to it whenever I was sad or angry or just not up to doing anything. Which, well, happened more times than I can possibly count.” Jeno sees him shake his head. “He always said that I was happiest there, and even if he didn’t understand it, not really, he kept taking me there. Hyung knew that it mattered to me, and I was always grateful.”

It wasn’t hard for Jeno to imagine Jaehyun do that. Even though he’s only met him once, he’s sure that he would do a lot of things for his younger brother.

He imagines a younger Jaemin, upset to the point that he’s too quiet. Jaehyun would probably just tell him that they’re going to the sea, no explanation, and Jaemin would come along. 

“When our parents separated…” Jaemin takes in a deep breath here, momentarily letting his eyes flit up to the sky, still a bright blue. “When they separated, Jaehyun hyung and I went with our mom to the city. I thought that of all the things that would change, I could at least keep going to sea. I was wrong about that.”

Jeno somehow finds Jaemin’s other hand, holds it in his own. It makes Jaemin tilt his head down to meet his gaze, and the corners of his mouth tilt up.

“I missed it, of course.” From where Jeno is, he can see the sunlight pass through Jaemin’s lashes. “I felt like I didn’t have anywhere to really escape to in the city, and I just felt so suffocated. Things just piled up and made me more upset, and I just wanted to go back. I wanted to swim in the sea again, lose track of time, go home dripping everywhere. I hated the city.”

Jaemin sighs. Jeno notes to himself that it sounds shaky.

“But I couldn’t get back to it, or visit any of the beaches even if I wanted to. We had a little restaurant then, and that meant no off days whatsoever. It was always about me and Jaehyun hyung helping around and delivering orders and dealing with customers. There was no rest for us, no time to go elsewhere.”

Gently, Jeno squeezes his hand. 

“So I tried to push it to the back of my mind, miss it a little less. But really, even if you do that, you’ll always miss the place that felt like home, the place that made you feel like things would be just okay.”

His gaze flits over to his son, still fast asleep on top of Jeno. “Then, I...I had Jisung.”

That’s another story Jeno has wondered about, but felt like he shouldn’t ask. It was for Jaemin to tell, and when he trusts Jeno enough, he just might share it. Jeno wouldn’t push.

The hand in his hair goes to reach over to the baby, strokes his head softly. “I promised to myself that I’d take him to the sea, no matter what that took. I knew he’d love it, and I wanted him to feel the way that I do when I’m in the sea: safe, and at peace.”

Jeno watches as he traces over the shell of a small ear. “And I told Jaehyun hyung about my plans, and he panicked.”

Furrowing his brows, Jeno asks, “Why?”

Jaemin takes another deep breath. He tries to smile, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

“He sat me down, and he was holding Jisung then, and Jisung was so  _ tiny _ …” Pursing his lips, Jaemin taps at his son’s forehead. “And he told me that around that age, they almost lost me because of the sea.”

The little heartbeat pressed against him is strong and steady, and Jeno wonders how Jaemin’s must have felt, back then.

“Jaehyun hyung was young, too, and he didn’t understand everything. But something was wrong. I wasn’t breathing. He thought they were just out to enjoy a day at the beach, but I wasn’t breathing. And you know, I barely believed it, because why would I be allowed to come back, then? Why would what became my safe space, once try to take me away?”

After a pause, where Jaemin only looks at his son, he continues. “Apparently, they didn’t go back to that beach for three years. Our family moved then, mostly because of my father’s job, and they had to get a house near another beach, practically just across from it. It was almost unavoidable by then, but they did nearly everything to keep me and my brother away from it, like it’s cursed or something. Until I got really sick.”

Jaemin’s smile now has a tinge of sadness to it. Jeno reaches up to touch his cheek again, just above a corner of his mouth.

“My halmeoni said that the more they kept me away from the sea, the sicker I’d get. My parents didn’t listen. I did get worse, and halmeoni took me to the sea herself. Somehow, I did get better, and my parents didn’t want to argue their point anymore.”

He’s heard of how the sea has been a way to cleanse oneself, a type of healing that can’t be found anywhere else. Even his own mother had said that, taking him there during his younger years to try to rid him of his asthma and allergies. It had worked somehow, but he still has the allergies.

Jeno looks at the tot, still blissfully dreaming. His breaths were even, his mouth pursed because of his cheek being smushed on Jeno’s chest.

“I reminded Jaehyun hyung of that, and told him that it mattered to me to take Jisung to my happy place. He agreed in the end, and even went with us. That was the last time we went though, because you know how life gets.”

Jeno does know. Still, he finds himself wishing that Jaemin can get more time to do this, when he’s a different kind of happy in a place like this.

He realizes that Jaemin took him to his favorite place, to where he feels safe and calm. Jaemin took him here, this piece of his heart, and shared even more to Jeno. It makes his own heart swell, at how he’s coming to know more about him, and that Jaemin trusts him enough for this.

There were many, many things he has yet to learn, he knows this. Jaemin had a lot to learn about him too. Here, on a blanket under the bright blue sky, it feels like he just might give out all his secrets. 

Shifting his hand, Jeno laces their fingers together, gives a light squeeze. Holding his hand is so familiar now. He wants to hold it now, and all the next times he takes Jaemin back to the place where his heart is.

♡

Jaemin wants to take their photos forever.

Squeals fill the air as Jisung jumps with every wave that crashes into his knees, throwing him backward just a bit. His hold on Jeno is tight, and even as he’s screaming with each wave, he doesn’t run away. He just giggles when it nearly takes him with it, squeezing his eyes shut and bouncing around for more.

The baby had woken up earlier and immediately wanted to go back to the water. He had kneed Jeno in his excitement to get up, and Jeno had to lay on the blanket for a few more moments before he could follow. They had held Jisung between them, letting him skip to the shore.

He’s torn between regretting taking his camera with him now, because he can’t get too close in the event that he gets it wet. But both Jeno and Jisung are having so much fun in the water right now, and even though he loves capturing as much of the moment as he can, he wants to join too. 

For now, though, he takes photos of their grins, of the way they nearly sprint away when a big wave comes. Jaemin can hear their joy, and it warms him more than the sunlight ever could.

Jeno scoops up his son into his arms, running into the sea. The wind whips at their hair, tears their laughter out of them. Jisung loves it when the water reaches him, and he gathers it to splash around. Once Jeno comes back to shallower water, Jisung always, always, asks to go back.

And here, Jaemin feels the colder blues of the late spring sky make way to the life of summer. Like all the remaining cold of the season is seeped away, replaced with colors so much more vibrant and waters so much warmer. Here, with his son in Jeno’s arms and them having the time of their life in the sea, it just feels so much brighter.

For a few beats, Jaemin looks over at him, taking in every detail he can. It seems like so much of the tension in Jeno’s shoulders has melted away. His arms hold Jisung securely, keeping him close. Every breath he takes, he looks happier somehow, and Jaemin thinks about how he hasn’t seen it this bright in the days they were together.

Like this, Jeno is the most beautiful man he’s seen. Sure, Jaemin had been aware of that since the first time they met, but something about this Jeno...it was different. 

His face was bare, and Jaemin could see all the little imperfections that made him look human, and not the angel that Jaemin has always sort of seen him as. Jeno seems to sway with the wind, moving with the elements of the place so naturally, like he belongs there. The smile on his lips is soft, warm, and it makes Jaemin want to kiss the corners of it. He looks so content, so at peace, and Jaemin wonders briefly what that’s like.

A part of him...a part of him feels like he knows. Ever since Jeno has been with him, it feels like things are settling into something more comfortable. Jaemin’s head had always been filled with ideas, with thoughts that he never really let out into the world, and Jeno made them quiet down. All the little things he would nitpick at, especially with himself, Jeno would praise. 

In the time that they were together, HJaemin felt like he finally found a routine. Little by little, it felt like he was improving, and his days were always more full of sunshine than before.

It was different, definitely. Maybe a bit scary, how someone could come into his life and make it feel like it was already better without changing much. Jeno respected who he was, how he lived his life, but just made it much nicer to live.

Jeno made him feel like he could find some semblance of calm in his often hectic, often boring urban life. It wasn’t what he signed up for, in any way, but now he finds he’s not sure if he can let it go.

It makes his skin prickle at the thought. The last full day with just them. 

He really shouldn’t be sad about it. Well, what right does he have? It’s not like this was supposed to be real. 

But he wants it to be, he knows this. He wants to keep this for as long as he can. Wants it to be real, beyond all the footage they’ve shot.

No matter how much they tried to show their real experience, the camera didn’t see what it was like. It didn’t see these moments, when they are quiet but it feels right. It didn’t see how Jaemin would see Jeno. It didn’t see all their little inside jokes and their not-so-late-night talks.

Even so, he’s tempted to capture this Jeno, keep the image somewhere close. He wants to be reminded of the good that’s happened in his life, and he knows he wants to remember Jeno just like this.

Once the week ends and Jeno leaves, he knows Jisung will ask about him, probably for the first couple of days. Jaemin knows that he’ll have to explain that Uncle Nono can’t really stay for long, and if he’s asked why, well, he just has to find a reason that his son will understand. Jisung might forget about him soon enough, and Jaemin won’t have to answer too many questions. That was for the best. 

One day, he’ll probably pull up the photos from the week, show them to his son. Tell him about Jeno, who he didn’t like at first. Jeno, who tried to soothe him back to sleep and played with him and bathed him and put fake tattoos on him. And that day, if Jisung asks about where he is or what happened to him or why he doesn’t come by anymore, Jaemin will be able to give him a better reply.

Jaemin hopes he’ll come by, no matter how this week ends. He hopes that he can see Jeno smile at Jisung again in real life, not just in the photos he’s taken. He hopes that Jisung doesn’t forget him, because he’s at the house too often for the baby to forget.

Because Jaemin might never forget. That warm, solid presence on the opposite side of the bed that had been just his for years. The way that their hands don’t quite fit, but holding Jeno’s now feels familiar. The kisses that never really became more, soft and sweet and accompanied with being pulled close. The stories, the laughter, the teasing. He won’t forget.

And when he looks back at this week, he’ll wonder why he was so afraid. Why he could barely imagine welcoming someone to their lives like that, when now he can’t quite see himself not doing that. When now, it’s becoming increasingly difficult to imagine not coming home with Jeno.

The two are now a few paces from the water, excitedly digging up sand for the sand castle. Jaemin takes a seat with them, pushing back Jisung’s now-wet hair.

When Jisung scoops up a shovel full of sand, it flicks in his hand and gets it all over him. Jaemin takes the shovel away gently, helping Jisung dust off the sand sticking to him.

“Careful, okay?” he says, showing his son how to get just enough on the shovel so that it won’t be too heavy for him to lift. The tot nods, reaching for the blue plastic tool to get back to work.

Jeno reaches over to pat Jisung. “No need to hurry, Jisung-ah. We still have time.”

Raising his camera, Jaemin takes a few shots of them. It’s Jisung’s first time attempting a sandcastle, and he wants to get at least one photo of this first.

The two work together, with Jeno making the walls of the structure while Jisung just keeps digging up sand for him to use and patting down the damp sand with his little hands. At some point, Jisung has his father get shells for the castle, and Jeno laughs at the face Jaemin makes at being bossed around by his toddler.

It all comes together in the end, a tiny castle with white shells and a twig at the top for the flagpole. Jaemin takes several photos of his son right next to it, and manages to sneak in one with all three of them right before the sea comes up to wash it away.

Later, as the sun sets, Jaemin takes exactly one last photo for the day. It’s of Jeno with a sleepy Jisung cradled to him, looking out at the sea as the sun dips below the horizon. Hues of orange and pink paint across their features, beautiful and absolutely imprinted into Jaemin’s mind, even without the photo.

He drives them home this time, letting both of them droop off into sleep pretty much the moment they’re strapped in. Jaemin doesn’t play songs, allowing himself the couple of hours of quiet after the fun day.

And when Jeno wakes up at stoplights to look for his hand, squeeze it for just a moment before falling asleep again, Jaemin allows his heart to feel what it wants to.

♡

“Jeno, we’re home.”

He wakes up with his forehead smushed to the window and a blanket draped over him. Jeno feels disoriented for a few moments, blinking slowly as he takes in the fact that they’re back to the house.

When he turns, he’s met with Jaemin’s face, just slightly illuminated by the lights in the garage. He still looks hazy somehow, so Jeno keeps blinking. Jaemin reaches out to run a thumb over the spot that might be red because of how long Jeno has pressed up against the car window.

“You alright?” comes Jaemin’s voice. His hand moves to cradle Jeno’s face. “I’ve already gotten Jisung to his crib.”

Giving him a nod, Jeno straightens himself, stretches as much as he can in the confined space. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’ll be out in a bit.”

With a little smile, Jaemin gestures that he’ll just go out to get all the other stuff. Jeno watches him go, breathing in the last of the car freshener and the scent of Jaemin’s bodywash on the blanket.

Once he’s a little more awake, he folds the blanket best as he can, unbuckling himself and placing it on the backseat. There, next to Jisung’s car seat is his favorite Mickey plushie, so he grabs that and moves to get out.

He’s just in time to catch Jaemin lugging their stuff into the home, and he relieves him of the cooler. Their stuff gets sand on the tiles and it all feels gritty, but it doesn’t seem like Jaemin minds.

When they’ve gotten everything in, Jaemin excuses himself to get Jisung into his bed clothes and hang up everything they’ve gotten wet today. Jeno works on emptying the cooler of the food and drink they didn’t consume, placing them carefully into the fridge.

Closing the fridge, he sees one of the drawings that Jisung has done at the daycare. It makes him smile, all the bright yellows and blues that he’s noticed Jisung really likes using.

The house is quiet as they all get settled, with the baby asleep and Jaemin and Jeno going one after the other into the shower to get the rest of the sand and sunscreen off. It’s quiet when they’re both done with their showers and changed into pajamas and Jaemin is reheating some stir-fried noodles for their quick dinner.

On the couch, Jaemin hands him a bowl, folding his legs under him as he sinks into the cushions. Jeno somehow finds his head on Jaemin’s shoulder, and he’s sighing as he nestles into place.

He’s just taken a bite of the noodles when a hand comes to rest on his knee. “Tired?” Jaemin asks, the first word he’s spoken in almost an hour.

Jeno nods, cradling the bowl in his lap. “Trips to the beach always end up in me collapsing into bed once I get home.”

He thinks Jaemin wants to chuckle, but doesn’t want to jostle him. “You can go sleep soon.”

Humming, Jeno traces the knuckles of the hand on his knee. It’s a wonder how Jaemin is still mostly awake, like a whole day didn’t tire him out.

The hand squeezes him gently. “Did you enjoy today, Jeno?”

Looking up at him, Jeno meets his gaze. Jaemin’s eyes are half-lidded, his brows raised just slightly. Even with the casual expression, there’s a tinge of hope there.

“I did,” he answers honestly, never taking his gaze away. “I enjoyed all of it. Thank you, Nana.”

Jaemin smiles at this, a real smile, and he brightens up with it. “I’m glad. I didn’t know if you’d like it.”

Jeno covers Jaemin’s hand with his own. “I loved it, I swear.”

For a moment, Jaemin only looks at him with relief all over his face. Then, he seems to get an idea, shifting to put his bowl down on the side table.

Getting his camera bag where he’s set it down, Jaemin asks him, “Do you want to see the photos?”

With a nod, Jeno folds his legs under him, watching as Jaemin takes out his own camera and switches it on. There’s a few button presses before Jaemin gestures at him to come closer, and Jeno finds his head on Jaemin’s shoulder once more.

The first photo Jaemin took today was Jisung trying on his goggles. He’s on the bed, holding up the green plastic lenses up to his eyes with his small hands, his face scrunching up. Jeno can already picture it being printed and put in a frame somewhere in the house.

For the next handful of shots, they’re all their early morning mess, with beach-appropriate clothes on the bed and Jeno preparing the food and Jisung trying on his floaties. It feels like it wasn’t even taken from today, like something that Jeno is just seeing through the lens of someone else.

After those are the ones that Jaemin took at stoplights. Morning sunlight making Jeno look like he’s haloed as he’s driving. Wide-eyed Jisung looking out the window at something Jaemin pointed out. Some of the scenery they passed, that Jaemin had rolled his window down for.

They stay like that for what might be hours, Jeno nestled against Jaemin as he pressed the button to go to the next photo. Each photo had its own little story, Jaemin mumbling about what was happening in the shot and Jeno adding his own input to it by laughing at the details. 

Jaemin keeps saying that he still needs to process the photos to make them look better, and although Jeno understands that, he also likes the rawness of it all. It had its appeal, just a little more real to the feeling, moments just captured on camera and not much else. He quite likes them as they are.

When they reach the part where it’s mostly Jeno and Jisung in the water, Jaemin slows down with his clicking. It’s like he’s taking more time to look at the photo, and everything about it. Jeno sees Jisung’s smile along with his, nearly every shot taken in the middle of their laughing.

“Jisung really liked the water,” he remarks, ghosting over their zoomed in faces. 

He can hear Jaemin smile a little wider. “You did too. You were so good with him.”

As Jaemin clicks to the next photo, Jeno looks up at him, trying to search his face. “You love the water too,” he breathes out. “Why didn’t you join us?”

Jeno wouldn’t have minded not having all of these gorgeous photos if Jaemin was with them, really with them too. 

“Ah.” Jaemin’s face doesn’t fall at all, just becomes softer. “It’s alright. I was okay watching the both of you have fun. It made me happy.”

“Next time, you come in the water with us.”

An eyebrow raises a bit more. “Next time?”

Jeno thinks that Jaemin tried to push down the hopeful tone, but he hears it all the same. He pokes at Jaemin’s side.

“Yes. Next time. Why wouldn’t there be one?”

For a few long beats, Jaemin only keeps his eyes on him, barely blinking as he seems to search Jeno’s face. He’s not sure what Jaemin finds there.

“Next time,” Jaemin repeats, and it’s like he doesn’t quite believe it.

Lacing their fingers together, Jeno says, “Next time. This is us, yeah? I mean, married or not, it’s us. Not one or the other. Together. Didn’t we promise that? We’ll do this together, next time and all the times after.”

Jaemin is stunned into silence, staring at him with his mouth slightly agape, like he needs to suck in breaths. Jeno sees his chest heaving just a bit, and it’s like he doesn’t know how to react really.

But he means it, every word of it. Whatever they may be after this, friends or something more, he wants to be able to do it together, with both of them in the photos and both of them enjoying. As it should be.

In the next moment, Jaemin dips to press a kiss to his lips, chaste and sweet. Jeno barely has the time to fully melt into it when Jaemin’s pulling away, murmuring to him.

“Yes. Together. I...I’d like that.”

Jeno leans in to capture his mouth again, makes the kiss linger a little more. A hand goes to his hair, pressing him closer. Jaemin kisses him like he’s breathing him in, keeping him there.

He pulls back, just a bit. “Next time. And all the times. Okay?” Jeno runs a thumb across Jaemin’s cheekbone.

Jaemin nods, and the smile on his lips is so beautiful, so damn soft and warm that Jeno has to keep kissing him.

Somehow, Jaemin maneuvers the bowl and the camera to the side table, then holding Jeno’s face in his hands to slot their lips together again. It’s so gentle, like the sun-warmed waves lapping up against Jeno. Jaemin is the sun and the sea and the breeze through his fingers. And he holds him, as close as he can, because it feels like he’s home, like he’s where he’s supposed to be.

His heart is pressing against his ribcage, almost to the point of pain. Like it wants to be with Jaemin’s, to feel that same thrum. Together, they had promised. Jeno thinks his own heart wants to be closer, to tug Jaemin towards them and revel in his warmth and the scent of clean cotton and all his light.

One hand makes its way down, finding his. They fit in the spaces between each other’s fingers. That’s a thing now with them, the hand holding. It’s steadying, achingly tender, and Jeno wouldn’t want it any other way.

Jaemin pulls him closer, and he thought it would be impossible, but Jaemin doesn’t seem to believe that. It makes him breathless, the way that they press together like pieces that fit, yet pieces that can still break if they go too far. Jaemin’s hands on him keep him from unravelling, stronger than he thinks and softer than he allows himself.

Jeno’s hands slip under Jaemin’s oversized shirt, running his fingertips over the skin. He explores cautiously, like this is a place he’s not sure he’s allowed to go over yet. Jaemin hums into his mouth, an encouraging sound, and Jeno maps out a trail with his touch.

Already in his lap, Jaemin’s heartbeat steadily grows to thunder alongside his, such a contrast to the fingers gently twirling into Jeno’s hair. There’s no real rush to it, like anything they’ve done, and the thought makes Jeno smile into each glide of their lips. They have time. 

So Jeno lets himself become lost in Jaemin’s kisses and the feeling so akin to the water that enveloped him earlier in the day. He’s lost in the feeling of home, and it’s like finding himself too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [twt](https://twitter.com/bundoie) | [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/evnsangcvlt)
> 
> tell me what you think of this one! ♡


	7. comfort

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this update took forever ;; school started for me and i've honestly just been unmotivated hhhh
> 
> a little warning for this chapter: mentions of verbal abuse (not extreme and is not done by major characters), mentions of abortion, mentions of death, death of minor character (in flashback)
> 
> this is a pretty emotional chapter, so buckle in yall

**『** ** _So many questions I've thrown to the skies_** ** _  
_** ** _All of the answers, I've found in your eyes_** ** _  
_** ** _When I'm with you, home is never too far_** ** _  
_** ** _My weary heart has come to rest in yours_** **』**

♡

**DAY 7**

Jaemin wakes up with a small knee in his stomach and grabby hands on his face.

“Appa!” Jisung whisper-shouts. “Appa, wake up time!”

Grumbling, Jaemin wraps his arms around his son, rolling over so that Jisung is trapped between him and Jeno. The tot squirms, trying to free himself. 

“Ap-pa! Appaaa,” he whines. 

“Just a few more minutes, appa is sleepy.”

He feels Jisung turn in his arms. Within a few moments, Jaemin hears Jeno groan on the other side of the bed. There’s some shifting, like Jeno is trying to get away from Jisung’s little hands clutching at him. 

“Wake up time, uncle Nono!” the tot chirps, and Jaemin can hear a muffled response. “Appa late.”

There’s a chuckle, drowsy and almost disbelieving. “Yeah, your appa’s going to be late alright.”

Another shift, and Jaemin registers chapped lips press against his forehead. With a sigh, he releases his son, lets him bound into Jeno’s arms (even though he gets a few kicks in the process). Even without looking, he knows that Jisung is most likely snuggling into Jeno just as they go out of the room. He snuggles into the sheets again, confident in the assurance that either or both will wake him again later.

He falls asleep, but not for very long. It feels like he was just asleep for all of 2 minutes before he cracks his eyes open again, squinting against the sliver of sunlight on his face. Jaemin groans, flipping to his back and staring at the ceiling. Taking a deep breath, he stretches in bed as best as he can. God, the Mondays have not gotten better.

When he’s got some of his senses in order, Jaemin registers the sounds coming from outside. There’s the pan being placed on the stove, and the clink of utensils. There’s also Jisung’s morning cartoons, as well as some toys squeaking. Nothing new, really, and Jaemin relishes in the feeling of normalcy.

This felt normal now, and he kind of likes that. He’ll worry about everything else later.

Sitting up, Jaemin rubs at his face. His limbs still feel the waves from the sea yesterday, can still feel the how his skin burned under the sun and the scorching sand. Jaemin feels himself smile at the memory.

He gets himself out of bed, feeling better than any start of the week he’s had in a while. His hair is sticking out everywhere, he probably has lines on his skin from his sheets, and is going to go to several early meetings, but he barely cares. It's a good day, he knows.

Jaemin pads out, noting how Jeno is very focused on the breakfast he's cooking. Smirking to himself, Jaemin goes to the living room, where Jisung has spilled out a good portion of his building blocks all over the floor.

"Morning, Jisung-ah," he says. The tot looks up when he caresses his head, eyes immediately going back to his toys. Jaemin boops his nose and settles down on the carpet with him.

Taking a handful of the blocks, he starts building a random shape. "Did you enjoy yesterday, Jisung?" 

With a nod, Jisung shows him what he's built so far. It's most likely his interpretation of a ship, and Jaemin coos at it. Jisung goes back to building it with a pleased smile.

"We should go to the beach more often, huh?" He roots around in the box for a yellow block. "It's always so fun there."

"Fun!" Jisung echoes. Jaemin plants a smooch on his cheek at that.

"I promise, we'll go more often."

Giving him one last read rub, Jaemin stands up. He makes his way over to the kitchen, where Jeno is already scooping rice into bowls.

"Hey," he greets, softly touching at Jeno's waist.

"Hey," Jeno smiles, making his eyes crinkle. "I'll be done in a bit!"

Jaemin pushes himself up on one of the barstools, swinging his legs. "Take your time. Mondays should be a little more slowed down, honestly."

As he watches Jeno move around the kitchen, now with a sort of ease. It's admirable, how easily he adjusted to being here, like this is really, truly his home now. No longer that hesitance, and Jeno almost tiptoeing around everything.

It's their last full day. It was going to come anyways, Jaemin knew. Still, it makes his insides prickle at the thought. 

The firsts were magical, were terrifying, were memorable. They would be the beginning to many more, and often, they were special to people. It's the firsts that are often remembered.

Their first meeting, Jaemin didn't know how to feel. Jeno was someone he barely knew, someone he wasn't sure he'd even get along with. He was someone who got flustered by smiles and whatever words they exchanged then. Unfamiliar, in many different ways.

And on their first day, the actual first one, there was a distance that was understandable. After all, what did they even know about each other apart from their jobs? Plus, Jaemin invited him to his home, and he was absolutely careful of everything. Jaemin had wanted to say his home wasn't made of glass, but Jeno didn't seem like he would easily accept that then.

It was the first few runs of a dance, figuring out how each other moved in their spaces, learning their steps, finding their own footing. They were uncoordinated, their fingers and elbows would brush against each other every now and then, and it was barely if ever to the rhythm. 

But they've learned since then. They can now hold each other securely, do all the steps together like they've been doing this for much longer than they have been. It now feels like that first day was long ago.

The lasts are often sad, bittersweet, memorable in ways that most people would wish they weren't. They were the end for many things, and people would do a lot not to get to the last of some things. It's the lasts that are often pushed back a little more into a box in one's mind.

Today is their last day, and Jaemin knows full well that he should be sad. End of something he never knew he'd actually enjoy, the end that, admittedly, he had hoped for in the beginning. That's because he was terrified. A part of him says it's normal for him to have even felt that way, but now a bigger part of him is asking why he felt that in the first place.

Because now, with Jeno cooking breakfast in the kitchen that was never really meant for more than two people at a time, Jaemin wonders what he was even afraid of. 

"Nana," Jeno calls out. He's already setting the bowls down on the table. "Breakfast!"

Jaemin has just processed what he's saying when Jeno's already walking to the living room, scooping Jisung into his arms. The tot goes with a giggle, getting louder as Jeno finds where he's ticklish. Somehow, Jeno manages the squirming boy, all the way until he's fastened him into his high chair.

All during breakfast, Jisung sings fragments of the song from his morning cartoons, and Jeno bops his head along with it. Jaemin tries not to laugh at the sight of this man, a near-stranger about a week ago, nearly dancing along to his son's best rendition of the song.

As he looks down at his breakfast of rise with braised tofu, Jaemin tries his hardest not to fall in love a little more.

Honestly, he should be scared of that too. This whole falling in love thing, he hasn't done that in a while. He's not even sure if he's doing it right, if there is even a right way to just fall in love with someone. He really doesn't know how to do this anymore.

Does he have to make some changes? Does he have to make a little more space? Does he have to buy flowers and put them in vases around the house even though he's not even sure if he can take care of them? Does he have to reconsider all his usual grocery lists now? Does he have to clear out a drawer? Does he have to have that urge to shout it until the ends of the world hear?

He looks at Jeno, who's making all manner of odd sounds to make Jisung giggle. Jaemin looks at him, and hopes that maybe he'll have time to figure it all out again, this falling in love thing.

Because, well, he's not scared anymore, and now he at least knows why.

♡

He dresses Jisung up for daycare today.

Apparently, Jisung really likes the color green. Although his drawer has pretty much every color out there, about half of it is green, all different shades. Once he's done with his bath, Jeno opens the drawer for him and lets him choose.

The first thing he pulls out are polka dot leggings, a very vibrant green. Jeno lays it down gingerly on the edge of the bed and asks him to choose a shirt. After Jisung comes back with about three more pairs of leggings, he finally gets a shirt, a teal one with a glitter dinosaur. Then, he pulls out mismatched socks, in very different patterns and shades of green, and Jeno just allows it.

Dressing babies should honestly be an Olympic sport, he thinks, as he chases Jisung through the house, whose head and one arm are through the wrong shirt holes. If Jaemin hadn't been in the bathroom, he most likely would have laughed at Jeno struggling like this.

He catches Jisung though, for probably the nth time that morning, lugging him over his shoulder as the tot squealed. Jeno manages to plop him down onto the bed and figure out the shirt situation, and he's already kind of sweating.

Jisung manages the socks though, so that's something. He pulls them on, wiggling his little toes before tugging on them all the way up. Jeno gives him praises, and Jisung gives him a wide smile when he does.

Unsurprisingly, he chooses a green hoodie as well. Laughing, Jeno just thinks about how he'll be very easy to spot later.

This isn't his last morning here, but he still feels his stomach twisting in knots at the thought. He's only been here a week, and yet it's almost longer to him. A lot has seemed to change in those few days, and now they feel like they've been there all along.

The mornings, god, he thinks he'll miss them the most. This routine that they've started, with Jisung waking them up and making breakfast and getting ready for the day, it is honestly starting to get ingrained in him. When he goes back to his own apartment, he might make a serving too many, or miss the scent of baby bathsoap, or wonder why there aren't any elbows and knees digging into his stomach in the morning.

"Jisung-ah," he says softly. The tot looks up at him curiously after a moment. "Do you think you'll remember Uncle Nono?"

Tilting his head, Jisung only stares. Jeno smiles, pats his head fondly. 

"I hope you do."

He scoops him up into his arms again, walking out of the room so that Jisung can put on his shoes.

At the daycare, Jaemin lets him bring Jisung all the way to the room he's supposed to be in. Nurse Joy is there to receive him, greeting Jisung brightly and telling him that he can join the other kids now. For a bit, Jisung just clings to Jeno's leg, sometimes looking up at him as if to ask if he really has to leave.

Crouching down, Jeno gives him a nose boop. "Yes, I have to leave, Jisung-ah. I'll be back later, you know that."

Comforted by this, Jisung takes Nurse Joy's hand and lets her lead him to the play area. Jeno watches as he bounces all the way there.

Later, in the lobby, Jaemin gives him a sympathetic smile, winding an arm around his waist. Jeno leans into it as they walk out together.

"He likes you a lot," Jaemin tells him.

Jeno can't help but look back at the one-story building of the daycare. He can't really see Jisung from here, but he can still imagine his all-green ensemble. 

"He does," he says, a little disbelievingly.

Nudging him in the side, Jaemin chuckles. "I don't know how I'll explain to him exactly what's going to happen."

Ah, that. Jisung was young, he wouldn't remember a whole lot, but he'll remember that something's missing at least. Jeno thinks back to the bags that he has yet to pack, and all the things that will change again, for all of them.

"I... have no idea either."

Jaemin's smile is tight, a bit sad. "Jisung doesn't forget easily, even now. I'm gonna have to think about how to tell him and all."

They reach the car, and they get in without saying a word. As soon as they've fastened their seatbelts, Jaemin automatically reaches for his hand.

"He'll do okay, though."

Jeno looks at him. There's a glow to him, either from the peaceful sleep or the morning sunlight on him. His eyes are warm, but they're tinted with sadness.

 _How about us, Jaemin?_ he wants to ask. _Will we do okay?_

They leave the parking lot soon, and Jeno keeps looking back at the daycare.

"Hey you," Donghyuck greets. There's a slice of something from the test kitchens that's put on Jeno's desk. "Happy Monday."

"Happy Monday, Hyuckie," he says, not looking away from his screen. "Am I getting more teasing today?"

"You bet." 

He pulls up the chair of Jeno's tablemate, someone who is rarely around these days. Plopping down, Donghyuck gives him a wide, all-knowing smile.

"Are you sure you're not actually married? Just confirming."

Jeno does his best to kick at him. "You're never gonna let this go, are you?"

Donghyuck kicks him right back. "I'm sorry, but did you see the videos you filmed? I have seen wedding slideshows that are less romantic than that."

With a sigh, Jeno presses send on the email he was writing that called for a meeting today. It's going to be as busy a Monday as ever, and he needed to finish up a few things before he needed to go.

"Hyuck, I love you, truly, but I need to do stuff and not be reminded that I am terrifyingly domestic with someone I'm fake married to."

He watches as Donghyuck's expression softens. Sighing again, Donghyuck quirks one side of his lips. 

"All I'm saying is, you don't need to let go of this, whatever is happening between the two of you. If it's good, it's good. You don't have to let go of it just because that was the original agreement. Please remember that, Jen."

Before he can respond, Donghyuck reaches out to poke him in the ribs, where he knows he's ticklish. "It ain't that bad to follow your heart too, okay?"

He walks away, leaving the empty office chair and a slice of something that Jeno is most likely going to scarf down later as his only lunch for the day. Donghyuck leaves him with a little more to think about.

**[NANANANANA** ♡♡♡ **]** ****  
**heyyyy** **  
****lunch?**

“Hi,” Jaemin breathes out when he sees Jeno. He’s slumped on the sofa in the lobby, Renjun tapping away on his laptop beside him. Jeno manages a little wave as he gets closer.

“Hi,” he greets back. “Doing alright?”

Jaemin nods, sleepy smile over his features. He’s blinking very slowly, and Jeno thinks about how Jisung looks almost exactly the same once he’s had his bottle of milk.

Reaching out a hand to him, Jeno cups his face. Almost instantly, Jaemin leans into it, and Jeno could’ve sworn he made a little pleased purr.

“Meetings,” Renjun says over the clack of his typing. He looks up to give Jeno a kind smile. “You might have to carry him out of here.”

On cue, Jaemin grumbles. “I knew I should’ve gotten another iced double mocha.”

Renjun pauses momentarily to dig his knuckles into Jaemin’s side. “No, you really shouldn’t. Jeno, you gotta help me wean him off of coffee.”

With a chuckle, Jeno says, “I’ll try my best.”

After some more chatting, he manages to get Jaemin to stand so that they can go to the restaurant across the street to eat lunch. Renjun waves them goodbye, even giving Jaemin an encouraging tap on the hip.

Jaemin brightens up with the food, at least. He happily eats his bowl of warm pho, so absorbed in it that he barely says a word. Jeno lets him enjoy it, and enjoys his meal too.

He thinks that he’s getting used to this side of Jaemin too. Jaemin may be one of the most confident people in his department, but that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t have these moments where he’s just quiet. Jeno has also learned that he doesn’t need to know about everything that Jaemin’s thinking for this to work. It’s fine to just sit together, and think the thoughts that they have.

Jeno tries not to let his mind wander to earlier thoughts. Instead, he thinks of some last-minute things he has to take care of.

Looking over at Jaemin, who’s now finishing off the last of the spring rolls, Jeno knows everything will be just fine.

♡

Buckling in, Jaemin says, “Hey, can we go somewhere after we’ve picked Jisung up? Just for something routine.”

Jeno looks a little confused at this, but doesn’t question. “Sure.”

Driving to the daycare center is mostly filled with Jeno talking about how close they are to finishing this big project, plus songs from his personal playlist. Throughout the week, Jaemin has learned that Jeno likes quite a lot of 2000s songs, and somehow, that fact makes him happy.

They arrive pretty quickly at the daycare, a little surprising for a Monday. Nurse Joy is already leading Jisung out, and the tot runs up to them, crashing into Jeno’s legs excitedly. Jeno hoists him up into his arms, tickling him while Jaemin works on signing Jisung out of the daycare.

Nurse Joy stamps on the logbook right next to where Jaemin has signed. “Never seen Jisung warm up that quick to anyone before.” 

Momentarily, Jaemin looks back at them. Jeno is pointing out the posted drawings of the week, probably asking Jisung about colors and shapes. Jisung’s eyes are wide, and his mouth is open as he tries to figure it out. The sight makes Jaemin smile to himself.

“Yeah, I haven’t either.”

They leave soon after, with Jisung refusing to be transferred from Jeno to Jaemin. Pouting at him, Jaemin sulks for a little bit before ultimately allowing it. He understands why his son is so fond of Jeno.

Once they’re all buckled in, Jaemin turns in his seat to face Jisung. “Do you know what day it is today, Jisung-ah?”

The tot purses his lips, brows furrowed. He doesn’t really have an answer, so Jaemin just nods and turns back to face the road. 

“That’s alright. You’ll see.”

For a majority of the drive, Jisung mostly sings to himself, still running on energy from earlier. He remembers the flyer that Doyoung had given him a few weeks ago, something about a music school for kids. It was his friend’s, and Doyoung had recommended it time and again. Maybe he’ll enroll Jisung there someday.

Beside him, Jeno only drums his fingers to the beat of the children’s songs playing on the speakers. Still, he doesn’t ask for any details, doesn’t even think to prod, even though he is most likely curious about it. Jaemin appreciates that. He would want to show first, explain later.

It’s not long before they arrive. Jeno doesn’t say anything as he unbuckles his seatbelt and goes to open the car door on Jisung’s side. Jaemin lets him get the tot, waiting until Jisung is safely cradled in Jeno’s arms.

They walk in relative silence, Jaemin in the lead. He tries to talk to Jisung, ask him if he remembers. There’s a little nod, but it doesn’t seem like he’s the most sure. That’s okay.

He stops in a small clearing, all grass and that one cedar tree. There are flowers surrounding it, all yellows and purples. He looks back at the two, watches as Jeno sets Jisung down and lets him run to the flowers.

“Where -”

Jaemin puts a gentle hand on the small of his back, urging him forward. Dried leaves crunch under their shoes as they draw nearer to the tree, and for a while, that’s the only sound apart from Jisung excited stomping around to look at all the flowers.

“Appa! Appa!” he squeals, pointing at the blooms. “Look, appa!”

“Yes, Jisung-ah, appa’s coming,” Jaemin coos.

Once there, Jaemin gestures for Jeno to sit. Meanwhile, he scoops Jisung into his own arms, bringing him close as he sits down beside Jeno under the shade of the tree.

Fondly, Jeno boops Jisung’s cheek, but the toddler is too preoccupied twirling the daisy in between his fingers. “Why are we here? Not that I’m complaining, I just…”

Jaemin gives him a soft smile. “About two years ago, I planted this tree here, as well as the flowers.”

Jeno looks up at him then. The last rays of sunlight cast an orangey glow on him. “Did you...have a reason?”

Nodding, Jaemin plants a kiss on the top of Jisung’s head, releasing him so that he can explore a little bit. He tells him to stay close, and Jisung nods vigorously.

“It was a request, actually. By Jisung’s mom.”

He hears Jeno take in a breath, but he doesn’t say anything to that. He just tilts his head, waiting for Jaemin to continue.

For a moment, Jaemin looks over to the tot, bright green even amongst all the grass and flowers. He doesn’t pick another flower, instead just crouching down and pouting at them like they’re talking to him.

“She...she requested it. Cedar for healing, and daisies for a new beginning, freesia flowers for friendship.”

He remembers the day he had gotten the little sapling and the daisy seeds. It had been kind of a roundabout trip, but he’d do it any day.

Reaching over, he picks a daisy, bright yellow like the purest sunshine. “I planted them myself. It was the last gift I could give.”

A hand comes to rest on his knee, squeezing gently. “Do you want to talk about it? I understand if you don’t.”

Finding himself smiling at the sentiment, Jaemin closes his eyes, nodding to himself. “I-I might as well.”

When he opens his eyes, his gaze goes straight to Jisung. The tot’s already sitting down, running his hands curiously over the soft petals of the blooms surrounding the tree. Late afternoon light bathes him in warmth, and the sequins on his shirt sparkle. Jaemin takes in a breath.

“She was my best friend,” he begins, and saying it after so long feels foreign on his tongue. “The first friend I got when I moved to the city, and we were friends all the way to college and to our adult lives. She...was a lot of things for me.”

In his lap, he’s twirling the daisy between his fingers. It’s so vibrant, so beautiful, and he feels a pang in his heart.

“Apart from Jaehyun hyung, I feel like she knew me best. Mind you, I wasn’t someone who shared everything, and yet, it was like she knew everything about me.”

There’s another squeeze from Jeno. “I’m happy that you had her in your life.”

It makes the corners of Jaemin’s mouth tug upwards. “I was happy, too.”

Momentarily, he doesn’t speak. He only looks at the flower, tiny, delicate. 

It’s been two years. Jaemin planted these flowers himself, watched them grow and took care of them, but he still isn’t entirely used to seeing them. 

He tries to remember her face. It’s blurry at the edges now, because he’s not entirely great at remembering faces if he hasn’t seen them in a while. But it’s still her, still as warm and friendly as his memory knows she will be.

Was. Something like that.

“And do you know that way that you love someone, that’s just...that? Just love for them, in the purest sense. Like, they’re such a huge part of your life, of you, and they matter so much that it’s difficult to think of what it would be like to not have them be there?”

He turns, and Jeno nods mutely. His gaze has softened, turned amber by the late afternoon sun. 

“I loved her like that. She was just a light in my normally dull life, and it was just all the better with her there.”

There’s a little nudge against his side. “Did you-did you ever tell her that?”

Jaemin feels himself smile a little more, a huff of a laugh coming out of him. “God, I thought you were gonna ask something else.”

Brows furrowing, Jeno asks, “What did you expect me to ask?”

“I thought you’d ask if we...yeah.”

For a second, Jeno’s eyes widen, and he’s spluttering. “Oh, I never wanted to pry that from you or anything -”

“It’s okay.” Jaemin covers his hand with his own, squeezing back. “People usually ask that. I’m thankful you didn’t.”

There’s silence for a few heartbeats, and Jaemin can practically feel Jeno holding his breath. He wants to laugh, soothe him. Instead, he looks back down at the flower in his hand.

“For the record, we didn’t. Jisung’s not mine.”

Jeno seems to intake another lungful, his hand tensing just a bit on Jaemin’s knee. “Oh.”

“Yeah. Oh.”

“But he’s so _like you,”_ Jeno says incredulously.

Laughing, Jaemin slaps him playfully with the back of his hand. “Good lord, I hope he’s not. He really doesn’t need all my internal conflict.”

That gets Jeno giggling too. Jisung comes over then, plopping into Jeno’s lap as he focuses on the tiny handful of flowers he’s picked.

“Seriously though, a lot of people have thought he’s mine. Talked plenty behind my back. I just didn’t correct them anymore.”

Jeno is dusting off dirt and grass blades from Jisung’s pants. “He’s still your son. He doesn’t have to be from you for him to be your son.”

“Yeah?” He twiddles with his fingers.

“Yeah.” Jeno looks up at him, eyes sincere. “It’s not about blood, being a parent. It’s so much more than that right? And, well, you’ve given Jisung more than blood. You’ve given him love and care and possibly the whole world. He’s your son, and you’re his dad, no matter what the world says.”

And really, Jaemin could have kissed Lee Jeno right there, right when he said that. But he holds himself back, letting himself feel how his heart swells 

Taking in a deep breath, he hopes he doesn’t tear up here. Jaemin thinks he needs to relearn how to cry too.

“Well, to explain, she got pregnant almost right after we got our first jobs. It was at a different company, smaller than Neo Videos. We were both just pitch-in writers then.”

Jisung tilts his gaze up at him, open-mouthed as he’s trying to discern what his father is saying. Jaemin ruffles his hair fondly.

“And she panicked. She wasn’t ready for it, her boyfriend wasn’t, and her salary then wouldn’t have been enough to cover the expenses of having a baby. It was the worst possible timing.”

Jaemin remembers that all too clearly. All the tears, the late night phone calls where he could hear her be so scared about the whole thing, and how he had to go to her tiny rented apartment to soothe her. How he had to hold her until she fell asleep, and stay in the morning to make sure that she at least got ready to get to work.

He remembers that his heart broke for her, with every single night that she spent crying.

“Her boyfriend didn’t want the baby, and really, she didn’t either. I...I saw her looking up clinics in the area whenever she was also looking for other jobs.”

Squirming in Jeno’s lap, Jisung starts singing, fragments of the lullaby that Jaemin always sings to him.

“I wanted to support her for her decision. If she didn’t want the baby, then she didn’t. I didn’t want her to go through something she didn’t want.” Jaemin gently pokes a soft cheek. “It was her choice, and hers alone.”

For a while, Jeno seems to just examine him. “You accompanied her?”

He nods, sighing. “She said that she needed someone to be there with her. Her boyfriend wasn’t - wasn’t going at all.”

The clinic had been surprisingly warm and welcoming. They gave her flyers, had nurses talk to her, but they never really forced her. Just assured her that she was safe there, and that she need not worry about anything.

It was going well. They had set an appointment for the coming week, and she was pretty much all set to go.

But when Jaemin accompanied her back to her apartment, she said, very firmly and resolutely, that she was keeping the baby. 

Jaemin had been taken aback, truthfully. They both knew that she wasn’t ready, probably will never be fully ready. They both knew that it was a heavy decision, and that keeping the baby would have its effects as well.

But when she explained to him, told him that she will do everything to take care of the baby, Jaemin thought he understood. There was a fierce love there, something that he didn’t have a full grasp of, but that he could feel from her. She was determined, and Jaemin has long known that she could do anything if she set her mind to it.

“She didn’t go through with it.” He bites down on the inside of his cheek. “But the boyfriend wasn’t happy.”

That part, Jaemin has mostly erased from his memory. It was just pain for her and for him, and it was better if he just didn’t remember.

“Did he - did he do anything to her?” Jeno lowers his voice, hopes the toddler doesn’t pick up on what he’s saying.

“Kicked her out of the apartment, refused to pay for support. Would continuously beg for her to lose the baby, but she refused.”

Jeno chews on his lower lip for a bit. “And then?”

“And then I took her in. That...wasn’t all that great either.”

It had been difficult. Jaemin had a boyfriend, and their apartment wasn’t much bigger than where she used to live. Arrangements would be challenging.

But it’s not like Jaemin could give up on his best friend, on the person that matters to him the most. He paid for it, but he wouldn’t have done it any other way.

“Why?”

Jaemin puts the yellow daisy in Jisung’s hair. “I had a boyfriend, and he wasn’t pleased about me prioritizing her.”

“Did he kick her out too?”

“I would’ve broken his kneecaps if he did.” Jisung offers up one of the flowers, a pale purple freesia. Jaemin thanks him, puts it into his own hair. “We fought a lot about her, about me choosing to take care of her than to take care of my own interests. She was pregnant, and nearly broke, and already having an unfairly hard time. He said that the way I was protecting her was as if I had gotten her pregnant myself, and then he started saying that I was a lying, cheating dick.”

“Nana.” Jeno’s voice is gentle, but firm. It grounds Jaemin, brings him back to the present. He sighs.

“I kicked him out,” he says. It feels good to say it. “I didn’t need him in my life if he even so much as thought that I shouldn’t take care of my best friend. Him doing that meant he didn’t know me at all, and I wasn’t putting up with him for any longer.”

Jeno nods, the beginnings of a proud little smile on his lips. “You’re amazing.”

He pretends that it doesn’t make a blush rise to his cheeks. “Thank you.” Shaking his head, he sighs again. “The world is so cruel, and I just wasn’t going to let her go through that.”

Somehow, Jisung crawls over to his lap, settling easily in Jaemin’s embrace. Jeno is still trying his best to clean the tot’s pants from all the dirt.

“And she, she was so strong. She kept working to the best of her abilities, and she’d do what she can whenever she had to take a sick day. She got up and didn’t let the words of her boyfriend or of anyone else get to her. She held her head high even when the world seemed to want to bring her down. She told her family, and braved it when they didn’t accept her. She smiled and she laughed and she danced and she sang nearly every day, even if the days weren’t the best. God, I’d do a lot to make sure Jisung is more like her than me, honestly.”

At his name, Jisung looks up at him, wide-eyed and curious, Jaemin smooches him on the forehead.

“She even kept bickering with me, over all my bad habits and occasionally, the dramas I watched.” Jaemin huffs out a laugh, shaking his head. “She’d hit me at the back of the head for staying up late to do work. She’d put her hands on her growing belly and say that she didn’t want the baby to hear some of the stupid shit I said.”

Jeno chuckles. He also reaches out a hand to caress Jisung’s head.

“I admired that about her. No matter what, she was so full of light. The world was cruel, but she never let it dim her.”

Jaemin remembers her smile, at least. Ever-present then, comforting. She still cried from time to time, still spent some nights curled up under the sheets. But she would always smile the next day. It felt like a promise to herself.

He stays silent for a while. He misses that smile, so damn much. Truthfully, he hasn’t allowed himself to admit it, because he’s been going for so long thinking that he’s strong enough to not miss it like that.

In his lap is her son, whose smile is a little too like hers, and Jaemin thinks the universe won’t let him forget.

Jeno notices. “What...happened?”

The breath Jaemin takes is shaky. Carefully, he wraps his arms around Jisung, pulling him in closer.

“She got sick in her last trimester.” He only shakes his head.

He doesn’t even remember what it was. Jaemin had accompanied her for a check-up since it had been a few days of her not feeling well. On-and-off fevers, vomiting, a pain in her abdomen. They had explained what it was, but Jaemin never fully understood.

All he really absorbed was that she was going to need to get the baby out as soon as possible. It was a month early, but they didn’t have much of a choice. It would have been dangerous already if they delayed it.

So, clutching her hand as she was wheeled into the emergency room, Jaemin found himself praying for the first time in a while.

It was then that she had asked him to plant something for her, just in case. Jaemin had refused to accept it, saying that she will survive this, but each passing moment only put more heavy stones into his body.

“Was it bad?” The softness in Jeno’s voice almost hurts.

Jaemin nods. “It was. All I got was that if they didn’t get the baby out, the both of them could die.”

Jisung looks confused again. This is the first time Jaemin’s discussed this in front of him, and even though he doesn’t completely understand, he already has some concept of the word “die”. Jaemin soothes him with a hand on his side.

“I was so scared,” Jaemin admits, in the smallest voice. “They were explaining the risks of the whole thing to me, and I was the most scared I had ever been.”

At that time, holding onto her hand as doctors did everything they could, Jaemin thought of the sea. 

He thought of how it was the only place he had ever felt actual peace at. He thought about all his promises to bring her and the baby to the sea. He thought about going back home.

“Their hearts stopped. The both of them,” he manages to get out. His throat feels thick and uncomfortable.

Jeno takes in a deep inhale. “And then?”

Shaking his head, Jaemin sniffs. “And then...I was escorted out. I think I was crying, or screaming, or both. Somebody had to hold me so that I could calm down.”

“Nana…”

“When they - when they explained it to me,” Jaemin’s voice barely sounds like it’s his anymore. “I just. I couldn’t process a single word. They had me sit in this waiting room and they gave me this little bundle, and they kept talking. I was just looking at the baby in my arms, tiny and asleep and _breathing.”_

In his lap, Jisung shifts, burrowing into him. Jaemin chuckles, rubbing a hand soothingly over his back. For a two-year-old, he’s always been so perceptive.

Jeno is chewing on his lip again. “And she…?”

Jaemin shakes his head, sniffling. A part of him is embarrassed that he’s making a mess of himself here, but another part doesn’t care anymore.

“They let us say goodbye.” He gives a little smile, the best he can do right now.

A nurse had led them back into the room. Carefully, she had taken the baby from him and put him on her while Jaemin gingerly took a seat on the corner of the bed. He had pressed his forehead to hers, and promised two things: to plant what she had requested and to take care of the baby, no matter what. He whispered it over and over to her, his tears falling on her skin, and his hand resting gently on top of the sleeping bundle.

Jeno scoots over closer, pulling him into his arms. Jaemin lets out a surprised little noise, and he lets himself melt into it. He’s not sure if he can even continue, but he feels like he should.

“Her name was Jisu,” he says, feeling himself smile at the name. Jisu, bright and happy and beautiful and kind and strong. “So I named him Jisung. For her.”

He must be crying, because tiny, grubby hands reach up to wipe at his cheeks. Jaemin laughs, closes his eyes. Jisung keeps wiping at his tears.

There’s a soft kiss pressed to his temple. “She’s proud of you. And I bet she’s so happy, seeing her boys be happy.”

Opening his eyes, Jaemin looks at him. Lee Jeno, bright and happy and beautiful and kind. He sniffles and nods, his head finding its place in the crook of Jeno’s neck.

_Ah, Jisu, I am happy._

♡

There’s a tug on his shirt as he’s drying the dishes. Jeno turns, and Jisung is holding up a storybook.

“Read?” he asks, voice high. 

He turns to Jaemin, who only smiles at him and nods. There’s a pat on his back as Jisung leads him to the bedroom so that he can read him the bedtime story.

Jeno giggles as he watches Jisung pull himself up the bed, as nimble as most babies are. Jisung settles against the pillows excitedly, and Jeno comes over to sit beside him.

_ “Snowy Goes to the Bakery.” _ Jeno reads out. 

The tot points out the white puppy on the cover. “Is that Snowy, Jisung?” 

Nodding, Jisung tries to repeat the name. “S-snohee.”

“Good enough.” Jeno plants a smooch on the top of his head as a reward.

He lets him open the book to the first page. Fingers dance over the illustration of the puppy with a basket of bread rolls hanging from his mouth. Jeno reads out the title again, and the author. Jisung mumbles what words he can attempt to say.

Jeno learns that Jisung is very much into turning pages. Little fingers try to go back to the previous one or to flip to the next one, and Jeno just allows him to do it. Sometimes, Jisung will go back just to look at the illustrations for a few long minutes, saying “puppy” again and again. Jeno confirms that yes, it’s a puppy. He also encircles the other elements on the page, like houses and cars, asks the tot what they are. Jisung very excitedly exclaims when it’s a car or flowers, but furrows his brows for everything else. Jeno tells them what they are, and lets him turn the page.

Halfway through, Jaemin comes in with a warm bottle of milk. He settles in on Jisung’s other side, offering him the bottle and ending up with holding it for his son since Jisung is preoccupied with pointing out the drawings. There are soft-spoken questions from Jaemin too, and Jisung does his best to answer them.

It takes them a while to finish the relatively thin storybook. Jisung takes a whole 5 minute pause to stare at the spread of the illustrated bakery, pointing out nearly everything there. Both Jeno and Jaemin try to tell him the names of the breads and the cakes, and only until the tot is satisfied do they go to the next page. Jisung is already sleepy as well, but he jerks awake whenever Jeno stops reading out the words.

Right at the last page, Jisung has very much drifted into sleep. Jeno whispers the last words of the book, closing it quietly as Jaemin takes away the empty milk bottle that has dropped to Jisung’s lap. Both are set down on the side table, and Jaemin moves to shift the toddler into a lying position. 

Thankfully, Jisung barely stirs, his lips moving slightly as if he’s still drinking the milk. It makes Jeno smile, and he gently pushes Jisung’s errant tuft of hair away from his tiny forehead.

“Didn’t know you were so good at storytelling to kids,” Jaemin says, the corners of his mouth tugging upwards. He’s settled down on his side, soothing a hand against his son’s belly.

“My niece refuses to sleep without a story too.” He mirrors Jaemin’s position, being careful not to make any sudden movements. “And it has to be in the most high-pitched, enthusiastic voice I can muster.”

Jaemin chuckles softly. “Yeah, sums up how to talk to toddlers.”

They’re quiet for a bit, watching every little rise and fall of Jisung’s chest. Jeno realizes that Jisung is pretty small for his age, all rounded features and the hands that grab onto him. Still, he’s as energetic as any two-year-old, coupled with his frequent babbling.

And like any two-year-old, he sleeps like a log after a tiring day. Jeno marvels at how he’s still not the fussy type who gets irritable when he’s tired. He just falls asleep, and like this, Jisung is even more angelic.

“How will we tell him?” he asks, not taking his eyes away. Jeno uses his fingers to stroke the side of the toddler’s head.

He hears Jaemin sigh. “I honestly don’t know.”

If it were up to him, he wouldn’t tell Jisung. Wouldn’t even leave, actually, so that he doesn’t have to tell him that he is. 

It was always difficult to say goodbye to kids. Even with his niece, who didn’t really give him a moment of peace whenever he had to babysit her, it was never easy to say goodbye. Kids clung to people, and getting close to them only made them clingier. And at the age that Jisung’s in, he’ll likely remember him somehow.

Also, he doesn’t want it to be a permanent goodbye. If he was allowed, he’d visit as much as he can, play with Jisung and listen to all his stories and attempt to feed him while making the least amount of mess possible. It wasn’t going to truly be routine anymore, but he still wanted to try.

“What if we don’t?”

Jaemin looks at him, he can feel it. Jeno doesn’t meet his gaze, instead tracing the donut patterns on Jisung’s pajamas.

“I’m just saying,” Jeno continues, “I can keep visiting, even for a few hours. It’s not really leaving.”

He thinks he can imagine Jaemin making a sad smile. “It won’t be the same, still.”

And that was true. Jisung won’t have that extra person to wake up in the morning, won’t have him to bathe him and dress him, won’t have him to ask if they can play. The toddler might forget and move on after a bit, but he’ll most likely be puzzled for a while, not understanding where Jeno went.

“I know.” He sighs, dropping his head to the pillow. Like this, he can see Jaemin still propped up on an elbow, moonlight illuminating him. Jeno can’t quite discern his expression, but he knows it’s tinged with a sadness.

“It’s important to tell the truth to kids,” Jaemin says, eyelashes fluttering as he looks at his son. “Even if they don’t understand fully. I’ve tried my best not to lie to him, no matter what.”

“So, you’ll tell him that your...friend is leaving?”

Jaemin grimaces. “I have to.”

Jeno snuggles in closer to the baby, practically feeling his little breaths. Jaemin’s hand wanders over to draw circles into Jeno’s arm, humming softly to himself.

“I kind of don’t want to sleep,” Jeno admits sheepishly.

He sees Jaemin smile, soft and genuine. “Me either.”

As Jaemin continues with the soothing circles, Jeno thinks of the bags he has to pack, of the things he has to do tomorrow. Everything feels like it’s both longer and shorter than it really was. His time here, his time with them, it feels like more than a week, and yet it also feels like it’s ending all too quickly.

He thinks of Jaemin, someone he had liked before all of this, even though it was just from afar. He thinks of the things that he’s learned about him, his habits, his little quirks,  _ him. _ The way that he laughs, the way that he goes about doing what needs to be done, the way he holds Jeno. There was still a lot to learn, and Jeno feels like he doesn’t want to leave just yet.

As if reading his mind, Jaemin says, “You can always come back here, you know. Nothing will be the same, but you can always come here.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Jaemin trails his hand down, interlaces their fingers to bring Jeno’s knuckles to his mouth to press soft kisses there. “Both of us want you to, I can promise that.”

Jeno feels himself smile. He nods, keeping his eyes on Jaemin. “Thank you. I will, you know I will.”

Jaemin chuckles. “Jeno, may this be a place for you to rest too.”

Propping himself up, Jeno leans close to kiss the corners of Jaemin’s smile. He feels him smile wider, and Jeno captures that with his mouth. 

He thinks of how this is now home too, and he knows he can rest easy here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what do you think of this chapter? drop a comment below if you can! i appreciate all of them <3  
> i actually also have the final chapter done. should i post it right away or should i wait a week or so? do let me know!
> 
> this fic is about to come to an end and i actually can't believe it. thank you so much for coming this far!
> 
> talk to me: [twt](https://twitter.com/bundoie) | [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/bundoie)


	8. last (?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's the last chapter ;;;;; i'm honestly so emotional about this.
> 
> i hope you enjoy this one!! i love you all, thank you for reading this ♡

**『** ** _Like a force to be reckoned with_** ** _  
_****_A mighty ocean or a gentle kiss_** ** _  
_****_I will love you with every single thing I have_** ** _  
_****_Like a tidal wave, I'll make a mess_** ** _  
_****_Or calm waters if that serves you best_** ** _  
_****_I will love you without any strings attached_** **』**

♡

**DAY 8**

Today, Donghyuck seems set to just gape at him.

“Oh my God,” Donghyuck says, his jaw dropping. He was literally just passing by Jeno’s desk, morning caffeine in hand (Jeno’s not gonna ask what’s in there), when he just pauses. Like there’s something on Jeno’s face that made him abandon pretty much everything he was going to do.

“Oh my God,” he repeats, setting his tumbler down on Jeno’s desk. He’s still gaping at Jeno, and the other man only starts giggling at him.

“What?” he asks, not over how absolutely in shock Donghyuck looks. It’s like Jeno just told him the most scandalous thing in the world (and he doubts Donghyuck hasn’t already heard something of the sort in his colorful life).

A finger is jabbed in his direction, and Donghyuck narrows his eyes in suspicion. “Something shifted. Oh my God.”

Jeno laughs now, shaking his head. “Should I start an ‘oh my God’ counter for you, Hyuckie?”

Donghyuck just lets out an exasperated sigh, running a hand through his perfectly styled hair. “I should’ve placed a bet.”

In all honesty, Jeno does not want to know what bet that even is. 

“So,” Jeno begins, trying to get them to talk about something else. “The final shoot today. What time will it be?”

It’s like Donghyuck finally snaps out of it, realizing what day it is and what they have to do. He gets his tumbler, taking a big sip before even talking.

“Oh yeah,” he says, so casually it’s like he wasn’t absolutely at his wit’s end just a few moments earlier. “It’ll be after lunch, so you can still do a few final things if you want to. Just to include as a last-day montage.”

Jeno hums. He’s grateful for the extra time. In fact, he did prepare a little something, and he was excited to carry it out.

Donghyuck tilts his head at him. “Are you ready for today?”

Breathing in, Jeno looks back at him. It was a question he had asked himself earlier, and he didn’t quite have an answer.

“Today is going to be just like any other day,” he replies, but it sounds fake even to his ears.

Donghyuck raises an eyebrow at him. He takes another sip from his tumbler. “Keep telling yourself that, honey.”

Jeno glares at him, nudging his designer sneakers with his foot. He doesn’t really mind the teasing now, but the question is still there, ringing in his ears.

Is he ready for today?

Will he ever be ready?

That morning, over breakfast, he could almost forget that it was the last day. He could momentarily forget that they were going to film the last segment for this challenge, and that he was going to go home to his own apartment after today. He could forget that he already had his bags packed and sitting by the door.

It was so easy to forget, when Jaemin’s arms were around his waist, his face nuzzling into Jeno’s neck. It was so tempting to forget, when Jaemin’s mouth had tasted like sweet syrup and good coffee.

Thankfully, Donghyuck leaves not long after, letting Jeno breathe for a bit. He goes back to his work, trying to focus. He’s going to finish a few more things, and then sneak his gift onto Jaemin’s desk. It was going to be fine.

By the time he gets a text from Yangyang signalling that he can come up and leave the gift, he’s already done with most of the things he was supposed to do today. Jeno sends out one last thing to be printed to the interns before opening his desk drawer.

Grabbing the gift bag he stuffed under his desk, he peers into it. Inside is a small-ish box, simple and unadorned. He takes it out, opening it to make sure the gift is still safely inside. Jeno smiles at it. It isn’t much, but he knows it will mean a lot to Jaemin.

Before he leaves his desk, he sees the frame. Jaemin had gifted it to him, their first ever photo together behind the glass. It has been there for most of the week. He remembers running his fingers over their happy faces, touching the photo when he was nervous or stressed or just in need of a pick-me-up. It was funny that he found comfort in stuff like that. 

Jeno gives the picture one touch, smiling at it gently. He’s going to need some comfort today. 

In the next minute, he’s walking away, holding the box to his chest as he goes to the elevator.

♡

Jaemin is a little nervous about his gift. It’s definitely not his worst work ever, but it’s not his best either.

God, he even had to get it from the printers downstairs. He had to keep looking at the time on his monitor so that he could pick up the gift. Jaemin didn’t want to be all jittery about it, but he couldn’t prevent it.

Yangyang notices, of course he does. Every now and then, he’d wheel his chair over, debating whether or not it was okay to comfort Jaemin, and then proceeding to rub at Jaemin’s back soothingly. He doesn’t ask. It does console Jaemin, so he’s grateful for that.

A part of him wishes he could prepare more. He knows that’s near impossible with everything that was going on this week, but he still hopes he could have done even a little more. 

It’s exactly 12 on his monitor, and he gets up. He tells Yangyang he’s just going to take a break, and the intern shoots him an encouraging smile.

Usually, Jaemin avoids going to the printers at this hour. The Lord and literally everybody else in the building knows never to go there when the people manning the printers are grumpy. That was quite literally the first thing he learned when he started work at Neo Videos. It’s why most people would either go before or after, trying their best to steer clear of the attendants that will most likely give them a mouthful. But today, Jaemin doesn’t have much of a choice.

Which is why he heaves a sigh of relief as he spots a familiar face behind the counter. The man is dressed in a simple sweater with the sleeves rolled up, his hands swiftly sorting out the pages that are being printed out and counting through them.

“Johnny hyung!” Jaemin calls out, the smile already spreading across his face. The man looks up, greeting him with a smile as well. “Didn’t know you worked this shift.”

Johnny puts down a neat stack to the side, picking up another to sort out. “Hey, Jaem! Oh, I don’t usually.” Jaemin watches as he thumbs through the stack expertly, counting even as he talks. “Just had to cover for someone.”

“Well, I am beyond thankful to see you.” Jaemin laughs, looking around the place. 

It was busier than usual, most likely also with all the books and merchandise being released soon. On most days, he liked being here, inhaling the scent of paper, ink, and heat-pressed vinyl. It was nice, and he would chat with the attendants, especially with Johnny. God, Johnny knew enough about him that he could already tell what he would be here for without Jaemin even saying anything.

Today, though, Jaemin has to pick up a special order.

“I bet you are,” Johnny chuckles, finishing the stack he’s holding. “You came for that print job from the other day?”

Jaemin nods. He had tried his best to get it done fairly early so they could have time to print it out, and he didn’t mind paying a rush fee if needed. Johnny, of course, insisted that he paid the regular rate.

Johnny momentarily disappears into a back room to retrieve his order, and Jaemin is aware that he’s bouncing on his toes. He’s both excited and very nervous for it, not sure if what he did would look good when printed out.

Soon enough, Johnny comes back out, holding two items. He places them on the counter, gently opening the plastic packaging so that Jaemin can check.

“You’ve gotta tell me what in the world I just printed out,” Johnny says, looking Jaemin dead in the eye.

Jaemin feels himself flush. Okay, it does look a little…odd, without context. He really should’ve explained when he first gave the files.

“Okay,” Jaemin replies, laughing nervously. “Which one first?”

The other man seems to think for a moment before saying, “The shirt first. Even though the other one’s a little more questionable.”

Jaemin really laughs at that last remark. Currently, he’s holding the shirt in his hands, running his fingers over the print. 

It’s a soft blue, kind of like some of the pajamas he’s seen Jeno wear during his stay at his house. Printed on it is a drawing of a dinosaur, along with the words “Dino Dad #2” in bold letters.

“Uh. Well. He’s basically Jisung’s second dad at this point, anyways. He bathes him, feeds him, dresses him, plays with him, cuddles him, even keeps up with Jisung’s babbling. You know how Jisung’s babbling is.” Jaemin looks up at Johnny, whose eyebrows are raised at him. He looks like he understands there’s more going on, but chooses not to comment on it. Yet, anyways.

“Uh-huh, okay,” Johnny says, and Jaemin kind of wants to punch his arm. “What about the other one?”

The “other one” is a photobook of sorts. It’s not that big, almost brochure-like. He’s compiled their photos, along with little notes and mementos from all the days he could. This one was the more rushed one, as he had to wait out until they at least finished day 5. He had sent it to Johnny as soon as he finished it (and it was 3 am, bless Johnny for not killing him).

It was like a little trip through their moments, and even though Jaemin was never the best at fully articulating how he felt about each one, he tried to do what he could. Admittedly, he could never truly capture what it was like to be in those moments with Jeno, but he feels like he still did a pretty good job. Jaemin wishes the little book can make Jeno’s day or make him smile even the tiniest bit, even months from now.

“It’s like a scrapbook, I guess,” Jaemin tells Johnny, flipping through the pages gently. “And a journal of sorts too. Logging in what I could remember from each day, and adding in all those little things that remind me of what happened.”

“People don’t make scrapbook pages at two in the morning, usually, you know?” Johnny says, but Jaemin can hear the chuckle in his voice.

Jaemin pouts at him. “I know. I just didn’t have time to do it any other time.”

Sighing, Johnny puts the items back in the plastic sleeves. “I understand, of course. Just…”

“What?”

Johnny looks up at him, fixing him with a look that says I can’t believe you’re still asking this. 

“Just that I haven’t seen you this whipped for a man, like, ever. And I’ve only seen these two things. Who knows how much more whipped you are beyond this.”

This earns him a light punch on the arm, which makes him laugh. Jaemin is shaking his head, but he can’t stop the grin tugging the corners of his mouth up.

“Don’t even try to deny it, Jaem,” Johnny teases, putting the items into a gift bag.

Jaemin takes the gift bag, signing a receipt. “I wasn’t planning to.”

Johnny makes an exaggerated gasp, and Jaemin punches him again. “Oh, he’s in love love.”

“I hate you, hyung.”

“Still not denying it,” Johnny says, sticking his tongue out. Jaemin only rolls his eyes at him.

Jaemin sighs, a stupid smile on his face. “I’ll never deny it. Not this time.”

Even as Johnny has the most triumphant grin as Jaemin turns to leave, he finds that he doesn’t mind it at all.

♡

Jeno is the first one to be on set. It’s the same thing, with a stylist doing her best to hide his dark circles (okay, these ones are mostly voluntary today) and him being careful not to ruin the lip color they put on him as he sips on his iced coffee (he really can’t understand the hype about this, but he does kinda need this much caffeine).

Today, Mark is on the set as well, probably more excited about this whole thing than anyone else is. He’s reviewing the flow with Renjun, even though they’ve done this a few times before already. Jeno can tell that he wants this to be a teeny bit different, because of course.

Actually, Jeno was called in a little early. He had just come back from lunch, and was only able to get hold of the gift bag on his desk before he was promptly whisked away to the studio. The gift bag sits unopened to the side, and they’ve already decided that he will open it in front of the cameras later, which he was going to do one way or another anyways.

The background is a different color today, now a soft pink that he thinks complements his baby blue sweater today. Everyone seems to be in a good mood too, buzzing around the set and making light conversation. 

Which is why Jeno feels a bit out of place. He knows he shouldn’t be, and that he should relax. No use being tense and shy now. It was going to be the last thing he films (ever, hopefully) and he should be happy about it.

He looks over at Mark, who turns and smiles reassuringly at him. Jeno returns it, before taking in a breath to calm himself. They were just going to talk about their experience on each day of the week, and then come together again later to formalize the “divorce”. Easy.

In a few minutes, everyone settles into their places. Jeno straightens up in his seat, closing his eyes momentarily and breathing in. This was it.

“Ready, Jeno?” comes Renjun’s voice. Jeno opens his eyes, smiling softly at him. He nods, watching as everyone falls silent.

**_How was your experience during the first day?_ **

Clasping his hands in his lap, Jeno hums. “The first day was weird. That’s honestly the best word I can think of.”

He chuckles. The first day already felt like a year ago. It seems almost hazy now.

“First, we got married,” he narrates. “That was honestly such a surreal experience.”

Jeno shakes his head. “We had flower crowns! And wedding vows! I was about to lose it right then and there, I swear.”

Renjun nods, scribbling something in his notes. Mark tilts his head at him, not saying anything. 

“And then Jaemin and I went to the daycare to pick up Jisung, and he was so hesitant around me. Understandable, since I just suddenly appeared in his life. That whole time that we were there, I thought, ‘Is this what it’s going to be like for the whole week?’”

He remembers the toddler, hiding in his father’s neck as Jeno tried to introduce himself. He remembers Jisung holding onto his fingers as if in greeting. That definitely feels like it’s been years since then.

“I honestly thought that he’d never warm up to me, and I’d be there, fully knowing that I already failed the challenge for the week.”

The crew laughs a bit after that. Mark chuckles too, the smile on his face widening.

“We decided to stay at his house.” Jeno remembers that first night, and how Jaemin looked so nervous (even though he was trying not to be) about him being there. “We thought it was best since he lives alone with Jisung and didn’t want to startle him with suddenly staying somewhere else.”

God, it would’ve been awkward if they had decided to stay at Jeno’s apartment, where Jeno would have to make a very detailed explanation of why exactly he’s bringing home a husband and a baby out of the blue.

Well, in all honesty, so much would be different if they hadn’t stayed at Jaemin’s home. Maybe they wouldn’t have experienced most of what had happened if they weren’t there.

Jeno talks about the way that father-son duo welcomed him into their home and their lives, with Jisung offering him play food and Jaemin giving him real food.

“And then we established rules, which, I’ve learned, we never truly followed all the way anyways.”

Renjun is smirking behind his clipboard, and Jeno sees Mark turn to him in confusion. With a shake of his head, Renjun just motions for Jeno to continue.

“Jisung was so wary around me. It was like he was thinking, ‘Who the _hell_ is this man and why is he all chummy with my appa?’ Which honestly, would be my exact reaction if I suddenly acquired a new parent without prior warning.”

The crew laughs again at that, and Jeno can’t help but laugh too. 

“The first day threw me into a marriage, got me my homecooked first meal with my husband, had me moving out of my apartment, and got me a son.”

Jeno remembers clearly how he felt that day. He could barely sleep in that bed, thinking about all too many things at once. It was going to be hard to adjust, he knew it then.

“And that was just the very first day.”

♡

**_Was the second day any better?_ **

Jaemin nods almost immediately, answering “The second day was definitely better. We started being better at being around each other.”

He recalls the first time that Jeno woke up because of Jisung crying. Truthfully, Jaemin had been a little embarrassed at waking Jeno like that just on his first night there.

“Jisung woke up crying, which meant that the both of us woke up too. I really didn’t want to trouble Jeno, but he was so nice about it. Which, really, I didn’t actually expect.”

Most people would be annoyed to hear a baby crying at the worst hours of the morning. Well, most people would be annoyed to hear a baby crying, period. But Jeno wasn’t. 

“He said that it was okay and he even offered to help. Believe me when I say that not everyone acts like that when a baby cries at ass o’clock.” He wags a finger at the camera. “Just a little something for anyone out there who wants to marry him for real. He’s already a winner with babies.”

Jaemin pretends that he doesn’t see Renjun raise his eyebrows slightly.

“Plus, he woke me up and cooked breakfast. Honestly, #1 husband contender right there.”

Everyone in the studio chuckles softly, before they all settle down again. Jaemin feels himself relax a little more in his seat, and he smiles at the camera warmly.

Cooking had always been a source of comfort for him, and he really liked doing it, but Jaemin admits to himself that getting breakfast cooked for them that first morning together made warmth spread across him. It really wasn’t much, but it was a little gesture that very clearly said “we’re doing things together and for each other”. That was a very nice thought.

“And then, oh my God,” he says, choking on his own laughter. “Okay, not gonna expose myself totally here, but I sing in the shower, you know, like most people do right?” He watches as the crew nods in agreement. “Well, I could hear him singing from the bedroom too.”

That was honestly a surprise. He didn’t expect that Jeno would just join in like that. If he were honest, he expected Jeno to just look at him weirdly once he got back from his shower. 

But lo and behold, Lee Jeno was singing Britney Spears with him. And for the record, he was good at singing.

Only day 2 and Jaemin was learning a lot about him already.

“You know what?” he says, looking straight at the camera. “I knew we were gonna get along just fine after that.”

Jaemin purposefully leaves out the part where Jeno got the reddest ears that Jaemin has ever seen on anyone when he caught him singing too, but that’s going to be a fond memory. He didn’t intend to fluster the other man, because he actually did forget that he couldn’t just go around and do as he usually does in his every day routine anymore.

It was fun seeing Jeno get shy like that, though.

“That day, I was made _very_ aware of his tattoos.”

He remembers them very clearly, made from how often Jeno strides into the room shirtless. Jaemin has free pass to touch them now, yes, but then, seeing them for the first time, it was quite the experience.

Up to now, he doesn’t know what all of them mean. Jaemin thinks of that as one of the many things they kind of ran out of time for, and he hopes that he gets the opportunity to ask about them in the future.

**_How did that make you feel?_ **

“What, other than my brain blanking out for a solid moment when I first saw them?” Jaemin laughs, if only to quell the rising blush on his cheeks. “Honestly, I was honored that he let us see. Jeno even let Jisung trace them, and he’d say what all of it was.”

Pausing for a moment, he recalls how Jeno tensed just in the slightest when Jaemin touched them and said that he liked them. Jaemin wasn’t even saying just how much he liked them, all the elegant dark lines against his skin. He hadn’t seen anything like that up close, and he might have slipped and said so many more embarrassing things.

“I saw them a lot over the course of the week, but it still feels like I’m just seeing them for the first time. Jisung wanted tattoos straight away after he saw them, and I admit I’ve been thinking about it too.”

Renjun has raised both of his brows now, high on his forehead. Jaemin knows full well he’s gonna get a teasing later.

He clasps his hands together in his lap. “That day… I started to realize that it was nice to have someone else with us.”

The corners of his mouth tug up into a smile, and Jaemin doesn’t want to stop it. “Jisung and I, it’s really just been us for a long time. We had my brother and his husband come over a lot, and of course Renjun and Donghyuck too, but this was different.

“We went _grocery shopping._ I know that doesn’t sound like much, but oh my god, having someone entertain the baby and tell him the names of stuff while I tried to figure out what to buy for the week? One of the best things ever. It was just… something I never knew I wanted to do with another person, and there Jeno was.”

It was fun, simple as it may have been. The day had been long and usually groceries would be a chore, but Jeno made it brighter, somehow. He seems to always be doing that.

Jaemin shakes his head, like he can’t quite believe it, now that he’s putting all of that out there. 

“And this is super cheesy, but some things are a little better with someone else there with you.”

At the snorts of the crew, Jaemin tries to amend it. “Okay, bad wording, I’m sorry. But I still mean it.”

He means the drive home, the picking up of Jisung at the daycare, the picking out fruits at the supermarket, the washing up, the goodnights. It was all made a little better, just by having someone there.

♡

**_Day three was a special day, wasn’t it?_ **

Jeno immediately looks up at Donghyuck, who has just arrived and has the most shit-eating grin on his face. Maybe Jeno should’ve really poured his coffee all over Donghyuck’s jeans that day he proposed this whole thing.

Day three. Double date with husbands.

“It started pretty normal, like the previous day,” Jeno says, looking up in thought. “We got up, we ate breakfast, we dropped off Jisung at the daycare, we went to work.”

He purposefully leaves out the part where Jisung very clearly said that his appa likes Jeno, because, well, Neo Videos and the world doesn’t need to know that.

“Okay, confession.” He raises his pointer finger, and prays to every god out there that Donghyuck doesn’t strangle him. “I think both Jaemin and I forgot about the dinner.”

Sure enough, the couple is looking at him, mouths agape, offended. Mark is only giggling beside them.

Jeno raises his hands in mock surrender. “In my defense, I was busy and I was still adjusting to the fact that I was married with a child, so forgive me.”

Seeing Donghyuck hold in a snort, Jeno loosens up a little.

“I only remembered when Jaemin texted me, and then I realized neither of us was actually ready for it. I had to Google what I was supposed to bring, because really, what do people bring to a double date with an almost-married couple, right?”

He notices Mark nudge at Renjun, and he bites back the smile.

“So we went there, to the Huang-Lee home, and we didn’t know what to expect.” 

Which is true. Neither of them have been on a double date before, much less with husbands, and absolutely not even anywhere close to having wine and hors d'oeuvres in a fancy home while Donghyuck is in his house clothes. Not even the slightest bit close.

“We got cake, and we argued over whether or not to bring a wine.” He sighs, thinking back. “We both agreed the wine was a bit too much, plus they might have already had wine at their home. Which, guess what? We were right about that!” Jeno chuckles at the memory.

He looks up again, and meets Donghyuck’s eyes. They both know about their little talk that night, as much as Jeno tried to push the memory of that down. It had stuck to him, even after the days that followed that double date night.

Jeno didn’t necessarily hate the whole talk, but so much of it started to hit a little too close to home the more he spent time with Jaemin. It wasn’t even that long of a time with each other and yet, all those things Donghyuck said, all that stuff that Jeno was trying to absorb as he stood in that kitchen, it started to make sense.

As much as he wanted to hate it, he couldn’t.

“Now, Hyuckie and Renjun are absolutely the married couple you see in those magazines in the breakroom.” This remark makes Donghyuck quirk up an eyebrow at him, but he looks amused. “You know, with the nice house and the put-together house clothes and big framed photos of their perfect life together.”

**_What did you do on double date night?_ **

Looking down, Jeno lets out a breath, smiling a little to himself.

“That night, I saw what being in a relationship worth keeping is like. Okay, we’ve all heard it. That it’s not always perfect, that they have their bad days and their inside jokes and all that.”

Jeno can practically feel Donghyuck’s eyes boring into him. He goes on. “Inspiring and all. But you know what? It was nice to actually see it.”

He knows Donghyuck is proud of him for even saying it, but he doesn’t want to see the look on his face yet. “Like, this whole marriage thing that I have going on isn’t actually real, right?” 

Jeno takes in a breath at that, and he hopes no one notices it. “But to know these two, to see them getting more and more comfortable with each other, learning about each other and going through stuff together, being in a relationship didn’t seem all that daunting. And this is coming from someone who never really planned on getting married, like ever.”

Finally, he meets Donghyuck’s gaze again. His eyes are gleaming with pride, and Jeno expected that already.

“I thought, you know,” he shrugs, “maybe we can get that during the week? Maybe...we could learn and make mistakes and patch them up. Maybe we could take cheesy photos like they did. Maybe we’d find a way to choose each other at the end of the day, like they do. This whole marriage thing could work.”

And they did. They explored all these little nooks and crannies about their lives, sharing random tidbits as they went. They learned how to work with each other, be it with housework or just plain goofing around. They took cheesy photos and had them framed. 

It worked, it really did.

“And then, after dinner, we played board games. At that moment, I realized, ‘Oh my God. We’re actually at this level of married now. We’re playing board games with another couple. This is just like those sitcoms!’”

Jeno wants to say that it was boring, but they did have fun. All of them were so competitive that Jeno was taken aback for a bit, but he soon got really into it.

“There was wine, and all these stories between turns, and so much laughter that I actually felt my sides hurting.”

He remembers that part at least, before it all became fuzzy from the wine.

“So yeah, I got tipsy. I think I crashed into a bed somewhere and was asleep like the two babies there. Jaemin drove us home and tucked us into bed.”

Jeno exhales at that, and he smiles. He doesn’t know what he did during that time, he doesn’t know what he said, but he knows that he was safe and taken care of, and that’s what matters.

“I remember thinking, it’s so nice to have someone with me, on my side. And Jaemin was exactly that.”

♡

**_What happened on the fourth day?_ **

“Ah, Jeno stayed home that day.”

He had offered, yes, but Jaemin truly appreciated that. The night before had been rather eventful, and he needed a little time away from Jeno to sort his thoughts.

Jaemin was probably never going to say it, but he had trouble sleeping the night of the 3rd day. He tried, he really did, but Jeno had been clinging to him and the mere fact that he was doing that made Jaemin’s thoughts go a mile a minute. 

That night, Jeno had confessed that he liked him, in probably the most innocent way that Jaemin has been confessed to. 

“He was hungover.” Jaemin lets out a little chuckle. “And I asked if it would be fine if he took care of Jisung that day rather than me taking Jisung to the daycare. He agreed.”

Jeno seemed like he was even excited about the prospect. After all, Jisung had been steadily warming up to him, and a day with him would have been good, despite the traces of a headache still there most probably. Jaemin was a little wary at first, since he didn’t want to force that onto Jeno, but Jeno just seemed game for it.

“I missed them, honestly.” The corners of his mouth tilt up, and he can almost mentally pull up the images that Jeno sent throughout the day. “Jeno gave updates, but that only made me miss them more.”

**_Missing Jeno already?_ **

Jaemin chuckles, letting the sound ring through the studio. “Well, there’s certainly something about suddenly having to live with someone else while also being very aware that they’re like, a floor away in the office. You spend meals together, drive to work in the same car, sleep in one bed. You get used to them, even though it hasn’t been long.”

For a brief moment, he wonders how much he’ll miss him after all of this.

**_So, wow, your husband and son spent a day together. How was that?_ **

Snorting, Jaemin says, “Oh, I think you’re gonna have to ask Jeno that.”

**_Did you enjoy your day with Jisung?_ **

Jeno perks up, straightening in his seat. “Oh, yeah! He’s a fun little guy, honestly.”

If Jeno were to be honest to himself, it was one of the most challenging things he’s had to do. He knows the basics of taking care of a kid, but even backed with his experience babysitting his niece, Jisung wasn’t exactly the same. Jisung cycled between bouts of hyperactivity or would be suspiciously quiet, as well as extremely perceptive for his age. He had worlds of imagination in him, as well as unbridled excitement as he tried to voice out his thoughts to Jeno.

And even if Jeno was supposed to be busy that day, he really would much rather close his laptop for a bit and play with the tot.

“The thing with kids is you can never learn everything about them right away.” He twiddles his fingers in his lap, pursing his lips. “Like, you can’t just meet any kid out there and know what they’re like. It takes a while, it’s really a whole learning process.”

**_What did you learn from him?_ **

Taking in a deep breath, Jeno smiles. “That kids are naturally so game for anything. Food, a movie, plopping down into a beanbag, that sort of thing. If it seems fun for them, they’ll just go with it.”

He thinks of Jisung scarfing down pretty much any food offered to him, no matter who gives it. He thinks of Jisung genuinely enjoying bath time and not running away from it. He thinks of Jisung laughing at random parts of _Tangled._ The boy was really in for anything.

“I learned that kids perceive some things better than we do.” Jeno sighs, looking straight into the camera. “Jisung just knows when you’re sad or tired or just not okay, and he also knows when you’re happy. It’s crazy, and it honestly got me wondering how we lose that sense when we grow up. If adults picked up on emotions like babies do, maybe the world would be a better place.”

A chuckle rings out from the crew. Jeno feels himself joining in.

“Seriously. He’d give me his plushies when he thought I was sad. He’s honestly the cutest.”

**_How about the babbling?_ **

This time, Jeno laughs, really laughs. “Oh my god, the babbling. They warned me, but I wasn’t ready.”

He can already imagine the montage of clips they will include, mostly his shots of Jisung talking non-stop. Jeno honestly hasn’t seen a baby talk that much.

“Jisung has the most vivid stories. Like, imagine this very expansive setting he’s conjured in his mind, with all the characters and then the action sequences that take place. Then, imagine a two-year-old trying to get all of that out in one breath. That’s how Jisung babbles.”

By the cameras, Jeno sees Donghyuck and Renjun snicker, nodding to themselves. Undoubtedly, they’ve experienced that a lot too.

“And he talks any chance he gets. While eating, while playing, while he’s in the bathtub, when he’s being changed into clean clothes. He never stops, and I honestly respect his energy to keep up with all that talking. God knows I can’t do that all the time. Babies really are something else.”

The crew chuckles one more time.

Donghyuck flips something in his file, and shows Renjun, who just nods.

**_You went on a date that night?_ **

Ah, Jeno has forgotten that they’ve sent a good portion of the clips to them already. He feels a blush start to rise in his cheeks.

“Well, uh, it wasn’t much.” He breathes out a laugh. “Just a little surprise for Jaemin.”

The plan had been rushed, he admits. He hadn’t thought of a date idea for their week yet, and he didn’t have a lot of days left. It was that, plus the thought of doing something nice for Jaemin that got him to decide on it.

Jeno bites the inside of his cheek. “I even got Jisung in on the surprise, which was a little risky since he did talk a lot. I felt like he’d expose it all before we even got to the office.”

**_What was the plan?_ **

“Just a picnic at the park,” he says sheepishly. “I know, not the most romantic thing ever, but I just thought it would be nice.”

He had been nervous about it, but he had tried to push it down as he prepared. Jeno wanted it to be a little dash of perfect in their busy lives.

“Jisung helped a lot!” He remembers sitting the toddler down on the counter and letting him hand over some of the ingredients, even though he mushed them a little in his hands. “He helped with the sandwiches, and the packing of the basket. He even picked out the blanket.”

Donghyuck is already pursing his lips, looking like he’s about to cry. Jeno fights down a laugh. Everyone else coos at his anecdote.

“I told him that it was for his appa, and he was so excited. That’s another thing I learned about kids. They just unconditionally love, that even something that adults would brush off, they would be over the moon.”

Jeno feels his smile broaden. Jisung really was the most precious, and a part of him wishes he could keep seeing him like that.

**_How was the surprise?_ **

Jaemin takes in a breath. It feels like that day was just yesterday.

“I loved it.”

Maybe it was because that had never been done for him before. Maybe because he was bone-tired and seeing them come and pick him up from the office made him almost want to cry. Maybe because the park was especially beautiful that night, and as simple as it all was, it just felt like _everything._

Or maybe, maybe, it was how Jeno arranged all of that, preparing even when he was supposed to be busy with his work. Jeno just had to do a whole picnic and make him feel like his day was suddenly all that much better.

Renjun gestures for him to go on, so Jaemin does.

“I honestly had no idea they were even coming to the office. I was just finishing up some overtime, when they arrived. And you know, with that sort of thing, I just felt all my exhaustion melt away. Which is so cliche to say, but it’s true.”

And he was so grateful. Even just having them there as he finished up, it mattered. It was comforting, with Jisung’s little airplane sounds and Jeno sleepily cooing to him. It felt like something he was bound to miss.

**_And the picnic?_ **

“Perfect,” he says easily. “I don’t care if I got a thousand mosquito bites that night, nothing could ruin it for me.”

Given the chance, Jaemin would rewind that night, relive it. He wants to go back to all their candid photos and Jeno being shy about the sandwiches and Jisung playing in the grass. He wants to go back to having Jeno’s jacket around his shoulders and their stories so easily passed between each other. He wants to go back to the constant hand-holding, even without the cameras or anyone else to see.

Jaemin wants that orangey glow from the lamps on Jeno again, to see him in the same light of the moment he decided for himself that he quite likes Lee Jeno.

♡

**_How was day five?_ **

Jeno feels himself smile. “One of my favorite days, I promise.”

It was a rest day, but they were all a little restless. Already, in the morning, they were off to quite the start.

“We put fake tattoos on Jisung first thing in the morning.” Jeno chuckles at the memory, at how much Jisung wanted them everywhere. “It was a promise, and we weren’t backing out.”

He had sent all the photos they took then, of every single tattoo Jisung got. Looking at them again as he attached them to the email made him laugh again, remembering how Jisung was so excited with each and every one.

Jeno tells them about letting the tot choose the tattoos and where to put them. With a laugh, he recalls how he had to tell him gently that he couldn’t get the car tattoo on his forehead and the tantrum that followed after.

“And you know, because he’s a toddler, of course that sort of thing would happen. It’s normal.” He shrugs. “Still, it’s a little jarring to see since Jisung barely did anything of the sort for the other days. I was surprised, to be honest.”

Then, Jaemin talking to Jisung calmly was also something new for him. No, not new in terms of Jaemin, but new for him. He’s never seen anyone so calm as they tried to get their toddler to become calm too.

He tells this to them, recounting how it was almost like magic to him and how he wishes they caught that on tape. 

“Jaemin’s a good dad,” he says, and he knows he’s smiling. “I mean, I knew straight away that he is, but each day I found out all the reasons he’s good.”

Jaemin was patient, in that he would always choose to listen to his son and wait for him to tell him what he wants or what’s wrong. He never rushed to do anything to solve it, and he pieced together what fragments Jisung could voice out. He gave him time to say what he needed to say. Jaemin never got him to hurry up so that he could do something else. He stayed with Jisung until he was done, and always, always rewarded him for trying his best.

And Jaemin had no plans to limit his kid. He let him choose his clothes, allowed him to pick out food from the fridge, didn’t even question any of his son’s outlandish background stories for all his toys. Jaemin was just a warm, encouraging presence, and Jisung was growing up very well because of that.

Because of habit, Jeno touches his ring finger, where his fake ring used to be. “Obviously I would not have figured out how to be a great parent in the span of a week, but being with Jaemin, seeing how he does it and learning with Jisung, I feel like it’s more doable now, after a week. Don’t quote me on that though, I’d probably make a whole lot of parenting blunders when I do get my own family and kids.”

He chuckles, letting himself relax. “That was another thing I learned. Parenting can never be perfect, and it doesn’t have to be.”

**_How was meeting his brother?_ **

Jeno lets out a nervous little laugh.

“I’ll be honest with you, I didn’t expect that it would happen.”

Their day had been pretty good, with the tattooing session and dyeing Jaemin’s hair and the visit to the toy store. It felt like an actual family bonding activity, without any pressure for them to do everything all at once. Just relaxing together, and doing what they all felt like doing. 

He found himself wishing that all days could be like that. Just them, without doing anything for the cameras. Just them, laughing and tickling each other and collapsing into heaps on the floor. Just them, with Jisung curiously tugging at Jaemin’s blue hair and Jaemin trying to explain why he couldn’t have blue hair yet.

Truth be told, Jeno had been a little taken aback at being called a family by the lady at the store. He had turned the word over and over in his mind, testing how it felt to think of them that way. He thought about it as Jaemin showed Jisung all the toys at the store, he thought about it as both father and son looked up and smiled at him widely when he joined them at the Lego table. It was ridiculous, to get butterflies in all of his functioning organs just because he heard someone referring to them as a family.

And he remembers how Jaemin reacted to hearing that they were called a family. How it nearly broke Jeno’s heart to learn that Jaemin hadn’t heard that as a way to describe them before, when they were probably the most beautiful family Jeno’s had the privilege to witness. He remembers thinking that he wants to really be part of that.

Then, later, with meeting Jaemin’s brother and brother-in-law, he thought about it again. They were warm and welcoming, and did what they could to make Jeno feel at ease. Jeno wanted to be part of this, of their tight-knit circle.

“I dunno if Jaemin told you, but they appeared at the door because it was tradition for them to eat dinner there on the weekends. Jaemin forgot about it, so he basically had to explain to his brother and his brother-in-law that he was married for a week. Imagine their surprise, seeing _me_ there when they had absolutely no prior warning.”

He sees Renjun snickering, and Donghyuck trying (and failing) not to do the same. Jeno knows full well that he looks rather intimidating to most people, and he swears Jaehyun might have had a conniption upon seeing him there on Jaemin’s couch, with Jisung cradled to him.

“They were super nice, though.” He smiles at the memory. Jaehyun and Doyoung didn’t originally seem like the talkative types, but once they started, they didn’t stop. It helped him relax in their presence, especially when he and Doyoung were left in the living room as Jaemin tried to explain the situation to his brother. “I’m honored to have met them. It’s good to know that Jaemin’s family is as kind as he is.”

Doyoung, especially, who seemed to want to take him under his wing almost immediately. He had encouraged Jeno to share more about himself, got him to start to trust them. Doyoung had helped melt away any of the lingering awkwardness, and made him feel like he was home with them.

And even though Jaemin kept cringeing at all the little tidbits about him that the two were exposing, Jeno found himself smiling for a good majority of that dinner. Squeezed in the tiny dining table set, they all enjoyed the dinner and the company. For him, it was evident that there was quite a lot of love in their family, and Jeno was happy to see it.

“I think...I think I really started to feel like I was a part of _this,_ of that life that day.” He takes a breath, nods. “That day, I really felt like I was a part of them and their family, and honestly? I was so happy about that.”

He thinks of Doyoung’s words. Doyoung had said that he has made them happy, how that’s all he wanted for them. Jeno thinks of how all he wants to make them happy, too.

♡

**_Day six, second to the last day. How did it feel?_ **

Jaemin’s heart thumps a little faster at the memory of that night. Hell, the memory of the entirety of that day. It all felt like a dream again. 

But Jeno’s warmth, his steady heartbeat against his, it was all so real.

Pushing down the rising warmth he feels spreading across his skin, Jaemin musters up all his words.

“Well, I had planned it, but at the last minute, I just decided that we should just have fun with it.”

In reality, Jaemin had been planning it since the beginning of the challenge. He had researched on nearby beaches, on possible cottages they could rent, even the best type of food to bring on the trip. Jaemin had wanted it to be perfect, it was their last date after all.

But that morning, seeing Jeno and Jisung get ready, he decided that he just wanted to have fun with them. No pressure to do activities, just a day of lying in the sun and playing in the water. That’s all he really wanted to do, he realized then.

**_Was he excited to go?_ **

“Oh, he didn’t have any idea where we were going. I wanted it to be a surprise.” 

Jaemin remembers the late night research he had to do to look for the beach. It was small, tucked away, and nearly impossible to locate. All he had was a blogpost from maybe 6 years ago.

But Jaemin didn’t want to give up on it. He wanted to do it for both Jeno and Jisung, to take them somewhere that’s as close to his heart as he can possibly find.. 

“When we got there, I honestly felt like I could just fall in love.”

The two had almost immediately went straight to the shore, and Jaemin had to chase them with a bottle of sunscreen and caps. Both were so excited, and Jaemin had wondered how long it had been since Jeno had gone to the sea.

Thinking back, Jaemin would’ve captured every single moment of that day if he could. He wants to replay it again and again, making sure he doesn’t miss a single thing about it ever again.

Biting on his bottom lip, he starts to weigh his words carefully. He didn’t want to share everything, but he wanted to give people a clear enough image of what they did on their last day.

“We went to a place that mattered a lot to me when he was a kid. I’ll be honest, I knew I wouldn’t be able to find it, but I wanted it to be as close as it could be.”

Jaemin thinks back to Jeno running up to the waves with Jisung, their laughs filling the air. There was a joy in their features, and Jaemin would have that tattooed onto him if he could.. 

That moment, he made a mental note to try to take them back there again someday.

“It was a mostly secret beach, just a tiny patch of sand and sea.” He knows that the editors will put up some of the pictures they took at this part, and he also knows that those pictures will never do the place justice. “It was my first time there, and I’ll tell you right now, it’s too beautiful to keep in photos.”

He also recalls how he kept taking pictures of Jeno. His shirt and hair were being blown about by the wind, but it didn’t make the image any less of a living masterpiece. Those photos are now tucked into an album in his phone, Jeno’s soft smile never fading.

Shaking his head, Jaemin says, “I know, I know, it sounds so romantic. A beach date, with just us there?” He chuckles softly at that.

Well, it’s true. Most people would plan that as a honeymoon or a very special anniversary date. But when Jaemin started planning it, it wasn’t anything like that.

The date was their escape from their usual daily lives. That whole week, they were caught up in work and responsibilities, with barely any time for them to breathe. It was why they often slept through all their movie marathons, and they didn’t even have the energy or time to get into the deeper talks.

It was a chance for them to just exist, as three humans, momentarily without a care in the world. Things weren’t back to their version of normal at that point yet, but they didn’t have to think about it. All that mattered was that they were there, away from it all.

Jaemin originally planned it as that, but that day, he had realized that there were things they just couldn’t leave behind in his tiny home. 

Like the urge to hold Lee Jeno’s hand in his. Like their little shared smiles in between bites of food. Like the nose scrunch that Jeno does that makes Jaemin want to kiss him.

“To be honest, I planned it as a mini vacation of sorts. Just a nice picnic on the beach and then maybe talk about anything and everything.”

He exhales, the corners of his mouth turning up slightly. “I realized then that maybe I should stop planning and just live in it, with Jeno and Jisung.”

It wasn’t intentional, but he realizes that’s a general theme throughout the week. He’d worried about not being up to expectations and disappointing him somehow, and he was fussing over little things, when Jeno came into his house and didn’t even complain about anything. When Jeno was grateful for every single thing he did, no matter how small and insignificant it seemed. When Jeno accepted cheap takeout dinner while sitting cross-legged on his old sofa.

Jaemin has definitely learned that he should just live in it, one day at a time.

(With Jeno?)

He takes a deep breath, definitely smiling now.

With Jeno, yes.

**_Do you think it was a last weekend well spent?_ **

Jaemin nods immediately. “Yes. Definitely.”

It was more than worth it, everything. This is something he firmly believes now.

“We took a lot of pictures, to remember the day, you know?” He holds up his phone, showing the polaroid at the back of it. The camera zooms into it. Renjun’s gaping at it.

“And he asked why I kept taking those pictures and I told him that’s what couples do.”Jaemin laughs at this. Not exactly what he said, but close enough.

Retrieving his phone, he looks down at the polaroid. Jeno’s pouting in this one, cheeks puffed up. “I said this one was cute so I kept it.”

He’s sure that he’s gonna get thousands of comments because of that if ever they keep that particular quote. They’re going to be so funny to read through once this video is posted.

Straightening up in his seat, Jaemin looks back up at the camera. “It’s definitely a day we won’t forget, even after all of this is over.”

When the director says cut, Jaemin looks back at the photo in his phone case. 

They’ll never forget.

♡

**_The last day. Did you spend it well?_ **

Jeno nods. “Yeah, we did.”

He bites the inside of his cheek. What Jaemin shared to him is not for him to share for the rest of the world, so he chooses to talk about the rest of the day.

“It’s a Monday, and just because we’re married doesn’t change a lot with Mondays.” He lets out a chuckle, lets a small smile spread across his features. 

“I dressed Jisung yesterday. Well, I had him choose the clothes, and I attempted to get him into the clothes. I swear, never get in between a kid and his love for a certain color.”

The crew laughs, a handful even shaking their heads. Jeno wonders how many of them have kids too.

“And okay, I got a _little_ emotional.” He raises his hands in surrender. “I just...I was thinking a lot about how it was our last full day, and I wondered if Jisung would remember me, even if it’s just the guy that changes his diapers and lets him choose an all-green outfit.”

Even today, as he dressed Jisung chicly for his quick appearance for later, Jeno wondered about that again. He wondered if Jisung would recall any of this, would recognize him if he didn’t visit for a bit (although he has a feeling that he won’t be able to resist). Jeno did his best not to show that he was sad about it, because he knew the tot would catch on and worry about him.

Jeno knows that Donghyuck is pursing his lips out again at this. He has a soft spot for Jisung too, he knows, so this parting is second-hand emotional for him too.

“At the daycare center, oh my god.” He shakes his head, huffing out a laugh at the memory. “Jisung wouldn’t let go of me, yesterday and today. It’s like he knew. He knew that something was going to happen, and he just kept clinging to me.”

He fights down the threat of tears choking him. Today was harder, that’s for sure. Jisung just wouldn’t budge, even when Jaemin had crouched down to say that they really needed to leave. The tot had only burrowed his face in Jeno’s leg, and Jeno succumbed and lifted him into his arms. 

Apparently, Jaemin hadn’t told him at all. Jeno thinks that Jisung saw him packing his bags, and somehow connected that with him leaving. Well, whatever the reason was, Jisung didn’t want to be separated from him.

Now, he’s currently with Jaemin in the makeup room, most likely napping. Jeno feels his heart ache at the thought of saying goodbye.

When he looks up, Donghyuck looks like he’s debating on whether or not he should cry or coo. Renjun has an arm around him, letting him nestle into his side.

“I’ll miss him.” Jeno sniffs, nodding his head. “I’ll miss the way he is an all-natural alarm clock that is more effective than any alarm I’ve ever had. I’ll miss the way he insists I tip off the rubber duckies into the water one by one when he takes a bath. I’ll miss him singing random songs whenever he’s focusing on something, like eating.”

He thinks back to Jisung tugging at his shirt, holding out a storybook in his tiny hands.

“We took more than an hour to get through one storybook. He was so entranced by all the drawings.” He chuckles to himself, remembering each time the tot’s face lit up with the illustrations, even though he’s seen them hundreds of times before. “I’m gonna be honest, I kinda didn’t want the storybook to end, either.”

Jeno takes in a breath, and he feels how it’s starting to become shaky. He composes himself, will himself to go on.

“It wasn’t a really eventful day,” he begins, shaking his head. He looks down, because he knows that looking at Donghyuck be emotional is going to get to him. “But I’ve learned something throughout the week.”

He steels himself, gets himself to look into the camera. He smiles, even though he knows that it’s wonky.

“I learned that all those little things are what we miss the most.” There’s a prickle at his chest, and he breathes through it. “We miss the mornings, the drives to work, the bedtime stories. We miss them, because even if they don’t seem like much, they’re actually everything.”

Donghyuck looks like he wants to go up to him and hug him, and the image nearly makes Jeno laugh. The camera cuts, and Jeno just innocently tilts his head at him. He knows full well the producer is going to slap him on the arm for that later, but he enjoys his distraught face for now.

♡

**_Before your final thoughts, we see that you haven’t opened your gift._ **

Jaemin winces a little, as if to say “yikes.” The box is in his lap, and Jeno is sitting in a chair in front of him, holding Jisung close.. 

“It’s funny, actually,” he says. “He put the gift on my desk while I was getting my gift for him.”

They met at the elevator, with Jaemin having to go up and Jeno presumably from his floor. It was an awkward moment as they greeted each other, fully aware that they’re both absolutely suspicious. Jaemin just got into the elevator as quick as he could and pressed the button for his floor before either of them could say anything more.

When he got back to his desk, the box was sitting on it. He didn’t even have to ask Yangyang who placed it there. The matchy samoyed stickers on it were enough of an identifier.

For some reason, he didn’t want to open it yet. He was excited for it of course, as he is with any gift, but he wanted to save it for later.

When that later is, he isn’t sure.

“So yeah, I haven’t opened it yet.”

Jeno speaks up. “Open it, Nana.”

“Okay, okay,” he says, carefully wriggling the top of the box off.

When he manages to get it off, he’s met with something familiar. He looks up at Jeno, a most likely confused expression on his face. Jeno only nods at him, urging him to look at it more.

Inside the box, swathed in what looks like dark red velvet, is Jeno’s fake wedding ring. As in, the one he had been wearing the whole week.

Gently, he takes the ring out, his eyebrows going up in surprise when a chain trails after the ring. It’s silver, a bit heavy, but still thin and sleek.

The chain is long, enough for it to end around the middle of his chest if he wore it. Jeno’s wedding ring is dangling from it, and he knows he’s meant to wear this as a necklace.

“Look at the ring,” Jeno says, so softly he’s not sure any of the mics caught it. Jaemin complies, catching the ring between his fingers and bringing it closer so he can examine it.

It’s the same smooth, lightweight metal that he knows. The ring looks a little worn from the constant use, from knocking around against things and exposure to the elements. Jaemin had always seen Jeno wear it, and barely had he seen Jeno’s finger bare.

When he brings it even closer, he sees something that he doesn’t remember the few times he’s held this ring. He’s passed this over to Jeno during the mornings, or sometimes he’d slip it off his finger when he’s already fallen asleep. 

Inside the ring, there’s an engraving, easily missable if he didn’t look. Tilting the ring towards the light, Jaemin reads it.

_Where I am home._

He looks up at Jeno again, who only tilts his head at him. Jeno knows that he understands it, even without further explanation.

Where I am home. Where they don’t have to be anyone or anything else.

Jaemin smiles, nodding. He puts on the necklace, pressing the ring to his chest.

Of course, they ask about what was written there, and he easily says that it’s their names. From the corner of his eyes, he sees Jeno cover his mouth, probably hiding his smile.

**_We heard there was another gift?_ **

Ah. He was going to go back to work, when he noticed a new note stuck to his monitor. It was a different color, a magenta that stood out against the other pink ones he has for himself.

It simply said that he should check his Spotify on his desktop. Jaemin had furrowed his eyebrows at that, but followed anyways.

Upon checking, he found that a playlist was opened on his screen. The playlist was titled “Jeno and Jaemin’s Greatest Hits”. It made Jaemin laugh immediately. Oh, Jeno and his humor.

Scrolling through it, Jaemin found all the songs they sang together, from their morning chores, to their (separate) showers, to their drives home. Each song he finds on the playlist makes him feel seen, feel like Jeno’s been paying attention to everything.

“He made a playlist.” Jaemin looks over at everyone in the room, trying to show that he barely believed it either. “The more I talk about this whole thing, the more this seems like a teenage romcom.”

Everyone laughs at that. Jaemin was right about that. It just seemed like their story had come straight out of those Netflix recommendations that Jeno always skipped.

“Again, not gonna expose my impeccable music taste here,” he shoots a warning glare at Jeno, who feigns being absolutely innocent, “but it was a pretty good playlist.”

“Aww, Jaem, play it for us,” Renjun chides.

Jaemin fixes a look at him, shaking his head. “Hell no.”

Renjun laughs, and Jaemin raises a finger to make him pause. “Oh, wait. Invite us again to eat dinner and maybe I’ll let you listen to it.”

The producer is now laughing even louder, crossing his arms and shaking his head. “You got a deal there, Mr. Na.”

Jaemin fist pumps in success.

“Okay, all of you here can absolutely bet that playlist will be played in my car nonstop starting from now on.” He points a finger at all of them, squinting in suspicion. “Oh, I know you all were placing all sorts of bets on us.”

Jeno’s eyes widen, and he presses his lips together. It’s obvious he’s stopping himself from losing it right then and there.

Everyone else’s eyes have also widened, and nervous laughter rings throughout the set. Of course, Jaemin knew about the bets.

He wasn’t going to say that he slipped Yangyang some money to place bets for him, too.

“All right, so that was that. That was our week married to each other. It was awkward at first, as expected, but it got better.”

Jaemin looks over at Jeno, beaming. “We had fun. We learned all sorts of stuff about each other, like him learning that I cannot stand strawberries and me learning that my own son probably loves him more now than he loves me. Overall, great week.”

Jeno shakes his head at him gently, rolling his eyes. He looks amused though, and Jaemin absolutely knows that Jeno can’t resist him anyways.

♡

**_You haven’t opened your gift either?_ **

Jeno perks up at that. He hasn’t forgotten about the gift bag sitting on his makeup chair, and he’s been wanting to open it since he first saw it.

“Can I?” Jeno asks, looking at the people in front of him. He knows he must look like a hopeful child who’s excited to open gifts, but he barely cares.

“Yeah, you can,” Donghyuck says, retrieving the gift bag. “Are you okay with us filming it?”

Jeno thinks for a bit. He’s not sure what the gift is, and if it’s not too personal to open in front of all these people and the camera. 

Donghyuck catches on that he’s hesitant. “We can call Jaemin in if you want.”

Although he’s not sure how that will help, Jeno wants to take him up on that offer. He nods, and Donghyuck sends someone off to call the other man.

Jaemin comes not too long afterwards, holding a very alert Jisung in his arms, and Jeno has to will his heartbeat to stay calm. He saw this man this morning, went to work with this man, but seeing him still makes his stomach flip. Just a little bit.

“Did they tell you why you’re here?” Donghyuck asks him, and Jaemin promptly shakes his head no. He looks over at Jeno briefly, trying to make sense of what was happening.

Renjuni comes in, pointing her pen towards Jeno. “Jeno’s going to open your gift. He said he wants you to be here, like he was here for you.”

Jaemin mouths an “oh”, nodding. Someone gets him and Jisung chairs to sit in, and everyone starts to settle into their positions again.

“Wait,” Jeno says, and everyone turns to him. It makes him a bit self-conscious, but he pushes that feeling down. “There isn’t anything too personal in here right?”

Jaemin laughs then, and that makes Jeno’s heart do the flip this time. “No, don’t worry.”

Nodding, Jeno gingerly places the gift bag on his lap, facing the camera once again. He gives the go signal to start recording.

“So. We both gave each other gifts, and I haven’t opened mine yet.” Jeno holds up the gift bag, waving it a little. “No idea what’s in here, he never gave any clues.”

Jeno ignores Jaemin’s gaze on him as he peels back the puppy washi tape to open the gift. Peering into the bag, he sees two different items, but he can’t quite tell what they are yet.

“Oh,” he says, reaching into the bag to get a feel of the items. “He got me two gifts.”

He pulls out one, a plastic-wrapped item that seems like it’s soft. “I’ll start with this one,” Jenp says, putting the bag down gently on the floor.

Laying the item flat on his lap, he sees that it’s a pale blue, very similar to the sweater he’s wearing today. It looks like a shirt, with what seems like a print.

Gently, he opens the plastic packaging, sliding the item out. Jeno unfolds it, holding it out in front of him, and he immediately makes an embarrassing sound. Clapping a hand over his mouth, Jeno is biting back another squeal. He holds it to his chest, looking excitedly at Jaemin, who grins at him.

“Oh my God,” he says, when he’s somewhat composed himself. He looks at the print again. “Oh my God. I need to put this on.”

Renjun signals him to go ahead. Jeno very nearly hops off his chair. He disappears into a makeshift changing room, where he quickly puts the shirt on over his sweater.

When he reappears, the smile on his face is the smuggest he’s ever had, he knows it. Jeno takes his seat again, nearly buzzing with how excited he is to talk about the gift.

He raises his hands, like in defeat. “Go home. Go home everyone. I officially have the best husband ever. Go home. It’s done.”

Jeno catches how Jaemin has to turn away so he doesn’t burst into laughter. It makes him laugh too.

He makes a stern face at the camera. “Okay, we need to talk about this.” Jeno makes hand gestures that show off the print, and he sees Jaemin covering his face in his hands. “First of all, this shirt matches so many of my sweaters.”

There’s at least six different sweaters in his closet that are close to this color. Jaemin knows him pretty well.

“Second of all, do you see this?” He gestures to the print again. “Dino Dad #2. Oh my God. I have been bestowed the highest honor.”

Jaemin doesn’t even bother to hide his laughter this time. Jeno joins in, shaking his head.

“Best. Gift. Ever,” he says, looking dead straight into the camera. “And I haven’t even opened the second one yet.”

He retrieves the gift bag again, taking out the other gift. This one is smaller, slimmer, and more like it’s made of paper. When he holds it up, he sees it’s like a brochure.

Humming, he opens it, sliding it out of the plastic. It’s not hefty at all, but more like a mini booklet made of nice paper.

Jeno reads the words on the cover, letting out a soft “oh” once he’s done.

“What is it?” Mark asks, his tone gentle. 

After staring at it for a few more seconds quietly, Jeno holds it up for the camera (and everyone) to see.

“It says, ‘7 days and beyond’ on the cover,” Jeno tells them, and he wishes his voice didn’t sound as shaky as it did to him. “I...I don’t even know how I’m supposed to react.”

He laughs again, but it sounds like he’s on the verge of tears (which isn’t completely false). 

“Look through it,” he hears Jaemin say. Jeno looks up at him, and he can’t even stop the smile on his face, even as he feels like he’ll start crying soon.

Jeno nods, opening the booklet to the first page.

There are stills from their “wedding ceremony”, along with shots of some of the details. There’s Jaeminl’s handwriting as captions, making funny little comments on those pictures.

On the next page are their pictures, plus some selfies they took on Renjun’s phone. Jeno chuckles at them. They looked cute, and with Jaemin’s little doodles at the sides, it looks even cuter.

It’s page after page of their days together, all these photos and scans of little mementos. Jaemin’s notes were so fun to read, and he’d get back to them when he can cry about it all without feeling camera shy. It was so lighthearted and yet so personal, and it felt 200% like a Jaemin thing to do.

The last page is mostly blank, with just a rectangular placeholder in the middle. Jaemin has made doodles around it as well, like cute hearts and stars.

His note on that page reads: Last (?) photo together

That one makes Jeno smile the widest.

He shows it to the camera, letting it zoom to the page. “It says that this is for our last photo together.” Jeno looks over at Jaemin, who’s watching his motions. “I doubt it will be.”

Jaemin smiles back at him, looking like relief has washed over him. 

It doesn’t matter what happens after all this. Jeno knows that no matter what, he can have that photo, and a thousand more after.

♡

For the last segment, they’re made to stand together, with their hands together in the middle. At the count of three, they’ll raise their hands and yell “divorce!”, officially ending their week as a married couple.

The stylists buzz about them, adjusting little things that will make the whole shot look better. The camera is moved back a little as well, to get them both in frame. Everyone is milling about for now, making the most of the little break. Jaemin and Jeno are just standing in the middle, waiting. Jisung is swinging their arms, jumping around as he waits for something to happen.

“Hey,” Jeno whispers, not even facing Jaemin. “We did pretty well this week.”

He hears Jaemin hum beside him. “Yeah, we did, honey.”

A week ago, Jeno would’ve slapped him on the arm for the name, but he doesn’t mind it now. It’s cute. He can (maybe) tolerate it.

Leaning in closer, Jeno says, “I’ll bet you dinner that there’ll be fanfiction of us within six hours of them posting the vid.”

Jaemin chuckles softly, also leaning in. “I’ll bet you dinner and a movie that it’s from one of the people in this room.”

Jeno laughs at that, hiding the sound behind his hand. “I’ll take that offer.”

Soon enough, everyone’s settling down, getting ready to film the last bit. Donghyuck looks like a proud parent beside the camera, encouraging his two favorite kids to get a little closer for the photo. Jaemin hoists Jisung up into his arms, pointing at all the cameras and the lights.

Putting their hands in the middle, Jaemin and Jeno wait for the go signal from Renjun. Once he gives it, they both raise their hands, yelling out, “Divorce!”

For some reason, it makes them both giggle. It’s about as ridiculous as their first day. 

“So we’re officially divorced now,” Jaemin says to the camera.

“But you know, we’re still friends,” Jeno continues. He feels Jaemin throw an arm around him, pulling him closer. Jisung is now clinging to him too, going from his father’s arms into his. The gesture soon turns into a hug, and Jeno’s balance is thrown off for a bit as Jisung squirms excitedly in his arms.

Tilting his head towards Jeno, Jaemin says, “This has been Neo Videos.”

Jeno nuzzles him affectionately with the side of his head. “And this has been ‘Married for a Week’.”

The director says cut, and Jaemin at least drops an arm. They’re still standing pretty close, watching as the staff clap and chat with each other about finishing this shoot.

Jeno breaks away a little to look at Jaemin, who looks back at him. He heaves a sigh, a happy one. 

It was the end, but it didn’t quite feel like that.

Jaemin is looking at him with that smug look, his eyebrows raised and his smirk showing off the dimple he has, the exact expression that Jeno would have pointedly avoided before a week ago. Now, well…

He can kiss that expression off his face later.

And also maybe forget about moving out, just for another day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaa thank you for reading up to here! it's been a journey ;; it's my first nomin ever, and my first chaptered nct fic that i finished, so it means quite a lot to me~
> 
> if you liked this work/chapter, do leave a kudos, comment, bookmark! i appreciate every single one of them ♡
> 
> talk to me: [twt](https://twitter.com/bundoie) | [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/bundoie)


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